Jan
6

Sermon: Genesis 3:6-8: The Fall

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 3:6-8

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths. And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.” (Genesis 3:6–8, ESV)

New Testament Reading: Romans 5:12-21

“Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned— for sin indeed was in the world before the law was given, but sin is not counted where there is no law. Yet death reigned from Adam to Moses, even over those whose sinning was not like the transgression of Adam, who was a type of the one who was to come. But the free gift is not like the trespass. For if many died through one man’s trespass, much more have the grace of God and the free gift by the grace of that one man Jesus Christ abounded for many. And the free gift is not like the result of that one man’s sin. For the judgment following one trespass brought condemnation, but the free gift following many trespasses brought justification. For if, because of one man’s trespass, death reigned through that one man, much more will those who receive the abundance of grace and the free gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man Jesus Christ. Therefore, as one trespass led to condemnation for all men, so one act of righteousness leads to justification and life for all men. For as by the one man’s disobedience the many were made sinners, so by the one man’s obedience the many will be made righteous. Now the law came in to increase the trespass, but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more, so that, as sin reigned in death, grace also might reign through righteousness leading to eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 5:12–21, ESV)

Introduction

As we begin to consider Genesis 3:6-8 today it would be helpful to remember that this scene is the central scene in the section which runs from Genesis 2:4 through to the end of chapter 3. The narrative of Genesis is highly structured. At first glance you might only see a series of words, sentences and paragraphs. But upon closer examination it becomes evident that the entire book is carefully structured.

I have already mentioned that the book is divided into ten parts after the prologue of Genesis 1:1-2:3. Each of the ten parts begins with the heading, “these are the generations of…”, or something similar. But it is interesting and also helpful to recognize that structure can be found within each of these sections. The structure of the narrative does impact meaning, for it focuses our attention and gives emphasis to certain elements of the text.

1 – 2:5-17 – narrative – God the sole actor, man passive
2 – 2:18-25 – narrative – God main actor, man minor role, woman and animals passive
3 – 3:1-5 – dialogue – snake and woman
4 – 3:6-8 – narrative, man and woman
5 – 3:9-13 – dialogue – God, man and woman
6 – 3:14-21 – narrative – God main actor, man minor role, woman and snake passive
7 – 3:22-24 – narrative – God the sole actor, man passive

I’m not sure that you would remember this, but as we began to study Genesis 2:4 and following back in September of 2018 I pointed out that Genesis 2:4-3:24 is highly structured. This section is divided into seven scenes which form a chiasm, with scene 1 corresponding to scene 7, scene 2 to scene 6, and scene 3 to scene 5. The fourth scene – the scene positioned at the peak or climax of the chiasm – is the scene that we are considering today in 3:6-8. These structures that are found within Genesis help to focus the reader upon the main point of the text. And what I am saying to you is that this passage that we are considering today which describes to us the fall of man is at the heart of the narrative of Genesis 2:4-3:24. We’d better pay attention.

1 – “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…
2 – she took of its fruit and ate…
3 – and she also gave some to her husband who was with her…
4 – and he ate.
5 – Then the eyes of both were opened,
6 – and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.
7 – And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.” (Genesis 3:6–8, ESV)

Furthermore, it should be noticed that this little section which is at the heart of the narrative of Genesis 2:5 – 3:24 also has a chiastic structure to it. The first half of the chiasm is marked off by a series of verbs – “saw”, “took”, and “gave” which culminate with the statement, “and he ate”. 1 – “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…”, 2 – “she took of its fruit and ate…”, 3 – “and she also gave some to her husband who was with her…”, 4 – “and he ate.”

This little phrase, “and he ate”, is at the heart of the passage that we are considering today. In fact, this little phrase, “and he ate”, is at the heart of the entire narrative which runs from 2:5-3:24 given that this scene is positioned as the central scene of that narrative. And it should come as no surprise to us, for the question, will Adam eat or not eat? has been on our minds ever since we read the words, “And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die’” (Genesis 2:16–17, ESV). This tree was a tree of testing. The question was, would Adam pass the test? Would Adam remain faithful and true to his God? Would he obey. The central scene of the narrative of Genesis 2:5-3:24, and the central phrase of that scene, answers that question with the words, “and he ate”.

The remainder of the chiasm corresponds to what was was said to us at the beginning of verse 6 concerning the woman’s hope for eating of the tree. Having listened to the voice of the serpent she began to look at the tree differently. The “woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…” She therefore “took and ate” and “gave” and “he ate”. Their hopes were high. They had grown convinced that there was no real danger in this tree, but that it would good for them, just as all the other trees of the garden were. In fact, this tree would open their eyes and make them wise, making them as powerful as God. The backside of the chiasm corresponds to this hope of theirs and shows that it was a false hope. Adam and Eve were terribly mistaken. 5 – “then the eyes of both were opened”, but it was not what the expected. They expected enlightenment, but instead they experienced the shame of their guilt. 6 – “And they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.” The serpent had convinced them that there was no danger in this tree, saying, “you will not surely die”. He convinced them that this tree was a harmless as all the others. But after eating from it “they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden” (Genesis 3:6–8, ESV). Instead of enjoying sweet communion with their Maker, they were terrified by his presence, for now they were in sin and were deserving of God’s just condemnation.

Having now provided an overview of this passage, let us now consider it piece by piece.

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…”

In verse 6 we read, “So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…” It was after this that she then took of its fruit and ate.

Notice, then, where Eve’s fall into sin began. The serpent brought the temptation to her (this we considered last week), but her fall into sin began within her mind and heart as she perceived that the forbidden tree was in fact the good and beneficial tree. She “saw” or “perceived” that the tree was good for food, etc., etc., and after this she ate.

And so it is with all our sin. When we sin, we sin from the heart. When we disobey God’s word, we do so from a mind that is bent out of shape. When we listen to another voice and go our own way it is because we have “perceived” that someone or something else is worthy of our obedience and devotion.

Eve’s rebellion began within her heart as she saw or perceived or decided within herself that the serpents way was in fact better than God’s.

She “saw that the tree was good for food…” In other words she had come to believe the tree of the knowledge of good and evil was not a danger to her as God had said, but would in fact be for her good at the serpent said. In terms of its danger it was like all of the other trees of the garden – it too was “good for food”. Eve perceived that tree was good for food and so she was no longer cautious about approaching it. In fact the tree that was once a terror to her (remember she had resolved not even to touch it) was now a “delight to [her] eyes”.

And do you not reason in the same way when you sin? Do you not first of all convince yourself that there is really no danger in the thing that God has forbidden? Yes, I know that God has said “be not drunk with wine”, but is there really any harm in drinking to the point of drunkenness with my friends so long it is only occasional and responsibly done? Or yes, I know that God has said that the gift of sex is to be reserved for the marriage bond, but really what is the harm? Or yes, I know that God has said to honor the Lord’s Day Sabbath and to not forsake the assembly, but certainly my situation is different. Brothers and sisters, you sin against God only after you have convinced yourself that God’s word may be disregarded. It is possible that you do this without realizing it, but I am sure that you have done it. If God’s word is in you, then you must explain it away, minimize it or set it aside somehow if you are to disobey it.

Eve convinced herself that the forbidden tree was in fact “good for food” and then it became a “delight to [her] eyes.” You and I are naturally drawn to that which we perceive to be good and right and are repulsed by that which we perceive to bad or evil. You can see the progression, I’m sure. First Eve decided within herself that the forbidden tree was in fact good. Then afterwards the tree that once seemed repulsive to her looked beautiful to her, and she was drawn to it.

Lastly Eve perceived that “the tree was to be desired to make one wise.” Things progressed even further. Not only did the forbidden tree seem harmless and beautiful in appearance to Eve (just like all the other trees), but it now seemed to her that eating from it would in fact give her wisdom and insight. In other words, Eve had convinced herself that the serpent was right and that God was wrong. Instead of bringing death as God said, this tree would open her eyes, and she would “be like God, knowing good and evil” (Genesis 3:5, ESV).

I will say it again: Our acts of obedience to God and our acts of disobedience against him begin in the mind and in the heart. Our behavior is largely determined by our perception of things. We live within God’s world and we are constantly perceiving things. We are constantly observing the world around us and making judgements concerning what we see. This thing we perceive to be good, and this evil; this right and this wrong; this beautiful and that ugly; this true and that false. And we decide to do this thing or that based upon those perceptions.

This is why Jesus said what he said in Matthew 6:22: “The eye is the lamp of the body. So, if your eye is healthy, your whole body will be full of light, but if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!” (Matthew 6:22–23, ESV)

What is Jesus encouraging when he urges us to have eyes that are healthy so that our whole body might be filled with light and not darkness? He is urging his followers to perceive the world around them aright. God’s people ought to interpret the world around them according to his word. God’s law should be so engraved upon our hearts that we love what God loves and hate what he hates. What he calles good and right and true, we should call good and right and true. What he calls evil, we should call evil. And we should believe it to the heart.

Where did Eve’s rebellion begin? It began in the heart and in the mind. She would eventually eat of the forbidden tree, not because her hand and mouth rebelled, but because her eye rebelled. She began to slip in her perception of things. What God called evil, she began to perceive as good – this she did in the mind and heart. She found herself in agreement with a voice other than the voice of God.

Brothers and sisters, this is why sound doctrine is so vital to the Christian life. This is why developing a biblical and godly worldview is essential if we are walk before the Lord in holiness. This is why the Apostle says, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2, ESV). And again the same Apostle says, “But I am afraid that as the serpent deceived Eve by his cunning, your thoughts will be led astray from a sincere and pure devotion to Christ.” (2 Corinthians 11:3, ESV)

“She took of its fruit and ate…”

The woman, after coming to see the tree as good, as delightful, and as desirable then took of it’s fruit and ate. This statement is simple enough. Here the sin of Eve is described. But I will take the opportunity to ask the question, where is Adam?

Adam was the one commanded by God to guard and keep the guarden temple. Eve was given to Adam as his helper. And yet Adam is missing from this narrative. He is nowhere to be found. The snake approached Eve. The snake spoke to Eve. Eve considered the serpents words and came to be of his opinion. And then Eve took of the fruit of the tree and ate. And where is Adam? He is absent.

We should not minimize the sin of Eve, for she knew the law of God herself. She decided to commit sin. But we should also highlight Adam’s failure. When Eve ate she sinned a sin of commission, having violated the law of God by her action. But when Eve ate Adam sinned a sin of omission. He failed to do what God had called him to do by his negligence.

Brothers and sisters, we should be mindful not only of sins of commission, but also sins of omission. In other words, not only should we take care to not commit sin, but we should also take care to not fail to do that which God has called us to do in his word. James 4:17 addresses sins of omission, saying, “So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.”

“And she also gave some to her husband who was with her…”

Notice that Eve’s rebellion continues. Not only did she come to see that the forbidden tree was the good and desirable tree, and not only did she herself take and eat of it, but she also gave the fruit to Adam so that he might eat of it as well.

Eve, instead of standing up to the tempter, became the agent of temptation for Adam. The snake did not speak to Adam. He spoke to Eve, and then Eve gave the fruit to Adam. It was Eve who convinced Adam to eat.

Brothers and sisters, we should be mindful of the way that our sin affects those around us.

Most do not like to be alone in their sin, and so they encourage others to sin with them. Most do not drink to drunkenness alone, but they bring others along with them. Sexual sin is always this way. A partner is required. Peter speaks to this in 1 Peter 4:3 and following when he says, “For the time that is past suffices for doing what the Gentiles want to do, living in sensuality, passions, drunkenness, orgies, drinking parties, and lawless idolatry. With respect to this they are surprised when you do not join them in the same flood of debauchery, and they malign you; but they will give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead” (1 Peter 4:3–5, ESV). Those who live in sin love to have company.

And the sins that you commit personally rarely affect only you. Others are impacted somehow and in someway by your decision to violate God’s law. Friends, do not rebel against God for your own sake, but also for the sake of others. We love God when we keep his commandments, and we also love one another when we keep God’s commandments.

Eve, though she was designed by God to function as Adam’s helper, became a hindrance to him by her rebellion. Eve was deceived, and through her the temptation came also to Adam.

“And he ate…”

And now finally we come to the climax of the passage with the words: “and he ate.” Adam was commanded by God not to eat of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, but he too decided to eat.

Let me make a few observations about Adam’s eating:

First of all, Adam ate being tempted by Eve, and not deceived by the serpent. Paul makes this most clear in 1 Timothy 2:13-14 when he says, “For Adam was formed first, then Eve; and Adam was not deceived, but the woman was deceived and became a transgressor.” The serpent deceived Eve, and Eve convinced Adam to eat of the forbidden fruit.

Secondly, notice that humanities fall into sin was not complete until Adam ate of the fruit. Adam functioned as a federal head or representative for all humanity. The Romans 5 passage that we read at the beginning of this sermon makes that clear when it says, “Therefore, just as sin came into the world through one man, and death through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned…”, etc. When Eve sinned, Eve sinned. But when Adam sinned, all sinned, for Adam appointed by God to function as a representive for all humanity.

Thirdly, it obvious that God created man (and also the angels) with freewill. That man was created a volitional creature with the ability to act upon choice was strongly implied by the fact that God set apart two trees in the garden as unique – the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, and the tree of life – and then commanded Adam and Eve to choose the one and not the other. Man’s freedom was implied by the choice that was set before them. But now it is most obvious that these creatures were created by God with the freedom to choose. By this time some of the angels had chosen to rebell against God (thus the serpent who was found opposing God’s rule), and now Adam and Eve have clearly chosen a path of rebellion. Adam and Eve were created with freewill.

Our confession is correct when it says in chapter 9 paragraph 1 that “God hath endued the will of man with that natural liberty and power of acting upon choice, that it is neither forced, nor by any necessity of nature determined to do good or evil.” Paragraph 2 also pertains to the passage today, for speaks of the ability that Adam and Eve had prior to their rebellion when it says, “Man, in his state of innocency, had freedom and power to will and to do that which was good and well-pleasing to God, but yet was unstable, so that he might fall from it.”

To be human is to have freewill. To be human is to have the “liberty and power of acting upon choice”. When Adam was innocent he had the ability, or the “freedom and power to will to do that which was good and well-pleasing to God, but yet was unstable, so that he might fall from it.” After Adam fell from innocency and into sin he, and all who would descend from him, still possessed the “liberty and power of acting upon choice.” Hear me now – what we lost at the fall was not the freedom to choose, but the ability to chose that which is right and pleasing to God. Chapter 9 paragraph 3 of our confession is helpful when it is say that “Man, by his fall into a state of sin, hath wholly lost all ability of will to any spiritual good accompanying salvation; so as a natural man, being altogether averse from that good, and dead in sin, is not able by his own strength to convert himself, or to prepare himself thereunto.” This is the state that Adam and Eve fell into. And this is the state into which all are born in this world. All humans have by nature the ability to choose, but now that we are fallen, we are in bondage under sin.

Paragraph 4 of that same chapter rightly says, “When God converts a sinner, and translates him into the state of grace, he freeth him from his natural bondage under sin, and by his grace alone enables him freely to will and to do that which is spiritually good; yet so as that by reason of his remaining corruptions, he doth not perfectly, nor only will, that which is good, but doth also will that which is evil.” This is the state that those who have faith in Christ are in. Having been regenerated by the power of the Holy Spirit these have been freed from their “natural bondage under sin, and by his grace alone [enabled to]… freely… will and to do that which is spiritually good…” though corruptions remain. Our confession is also right in paragraph 5 when it says that” this will of man is made perfectly and immutably free to good alone in the state of glory only.”

What is the common denominator present in each of these states of being – innocence, sin, grace and glory? The common denominator is that human beings have freewill. They possess the “liberty and power of acting upon choice”. To be human is to have freewill. What changes in each of these states of being? Man’s ability changes. Adam in innocence was able to obey or to rebel. Adam in sin is able only to rebel. Adam in grace is able to “will and to do that which is spiritually good”, yet corruptions reman. Adam in glory will be made “perfectly and immutably free to good alone.”

When Adam ate he and his wife died, and so too did all of his posterity. Though the went on living for a very long time, the entered into a state of sin and death when they rebelled against their Maker. They fell from innocency, and into sin. And the wages of sin is death. This is our condition apart from Christ. We are dead in our trespasses and sins. If we are to live, then God must make us alive through Christ.

“Then the eyes of both were opened…”

Verses 7 and 8 make all that I have just said concerning man’s fall into sin and death abundantly clear. Remember that the backside of the chiasm corresponds to the false hopes that Eve had for the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

Remember that she thought by eating of the tree she and Adam would be made wise. And what was the result of their eating? Indeed, their eyes were opened, but not as they thought.

“And they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.”

Instead of bringing delight to the man and the woman, they now experienced the shame of their sin. They immediately “knew that they were naked.” Shame was something that neither of them had experienced before, and now a sense of shame rushed over them.

And notice their response. Their impulse was to cover their shame. They “sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.” Were the situation not so serious, it would be comical. Immagine Adam and Eve frantically sewing together coverings for themselves out of leaves.

And this is what we do with our sin. Instead of confessing it to God and to one another, we are tempted to conceal it. But God’s word says, “Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy.” (Proverbs 28:13, ESV)

And not only does sinful man conceal his sin, he also seeks to provide his own remedy for his sin. And here is the difference between true and false religion. True religion has God and his word as its authority. True religion looks to God and God alone and places all of its hope in him. False religion has the wisdom of man as its source. False religion sets its hope upon the things of this world – things that are manmade.

Adam and Eve ate of the forbidden fruit. And having sinned against God, they hid. And while they hid, they franticly worked to provide atonement for their sins, but as we will see, they could not. Those fig leaves would prove to be inadequate.

“And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.”

Eve had hoped that the forbidden tree would be harmless – “good for food” like all of the other trees of the garden. But what did she find? Both Adam and Eve found that the tree brought death, just as God said that it would. Verse 8: “And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.”

Notice a few things about this verse:

First of all, notice that God is here called the LORD God. This name for God (Yahweh Elohim) emphasizes that God is the covenant making and covenant keeping God – the God who is near to and intimate with his people. God has been called by this name throughout Genesis 2 and 3. I failed to mention it last week, but it should be noted that when the serpent spoke to Eve of God he did not call him “the LORD God”, but only “God”. “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil” (Genesis 3:5, ESV), he said. By calling God “Elohim” instead of “Yahweh Elohim” the serpent was minimizing God’s nearness. But now God is called Yahweh Elohim again. He is still the the covenant making and covenant keeping God, but now the covenant has been broken. He is still the God who is near to and intimate with his people, but now his people are in sin.

Secondly, notice that the LORD God had a habit of walking with Adam and Eve in the garden. Adam and Eve had enjoyed the presence of God in that place prior to their sin. And this corresponds to all that has been said in previous sermons about the garden being a temple with Adam as priest. The garden is where Adam and Eve enjoyed God’s presence – and that is what makes a temple a temple – God’s presence with his people.

Thirdly, notice that God’s presence was no longer a comfort and joy to Adam and Eve after they had sinned. Now God’s presence was a terror to them. Again, “they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden.”

Conclusion

This passage should cause sinful man to weep and to tremble. What a terrible and heinous thing it is for creatures to rebel against their Creator – a Creator who is nothing but good and generous and kind. And what a sad thought that the relationship that was once a joy to man has become a terror to him. To think of Adam and Eve running and hiding from the sound of the LORD God and from his presence should cause our hearts to ache.

Oh, how far we have fallen. We were made to live for God’s glory and to enjoy him forever and ever, but we have fallen short of the glory of God and are now by nature children of wrath. This is true for all the children of Adam who are still in their sins.

Friends, this bad news. But good news is coming. Soon we will see that LORD God is gracious. He will graciously clothe Adam and Eve and pronounce good news to them, that a Savior would be provide. He is Christ Jesus our Lord. Let us look to him. “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23, ESV). “If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9, ESV).

Tags: Genesis 3:6-8

Posted in Sermons Genesis 3:6-8
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Dec
30

Sermon: Genesis 3:1-5: The First Temptation

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 3:1-5

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’ And the woman said to the serpent, ‘We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’’ But the serpent said to the woman, ‘You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.’” (Genesis 3:1–5, ESV)

New Testament Reading: John 8:31-47

“So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed him, ‘If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.’ They answered him, ‘We are offspring of Abraham and have never been enslaved to anyone. How is it that you say, ‘You will become free’?’ Jesus answered them, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who practices sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son remains forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. I know that you are offspring of Abraham; yet you seek to kill me because my word finds no place in you. I speak of what I have seen with my Father, and you do what you have heard from your father.’ They answered him, ‘Abraham is our father.’ Jesus said to them, ‘If you were Abraham’s children, you would be doing the works Abraham did, but now you seek to kill me, a man who has told you the truth that I heard from God. This is not what Abraham did. You are doing the works your father did.’ They said to him, ‘We were not born of sexual immorality. We have one Father—even God.’ Jesus said to them, ‘If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and I am here. I came not of my own accord, but he sent me. Why do you not understand what I say? It is because you cannot bear to hear my word. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks out of his own character, for he is a liar and the father of lies. But because I tell the truth, you do not believe me. Which one of you convicts me of sin? If I tell the truth, why do you not believe me? Whoever is of God hears the words of God. The reason why you do not hear them is that you are not of God.’” (John 8:31–47, ESV)

*****

Introduction

It has been a while now since we have been in the text of Genesis given that we took nine sermons to explore the topic of marriage, divorce and remarriage. It would be good for us to remember where we are in this book which, I will remind you, is highly structured.

The book of Genesis is divided into eleven parts. There is a prologue which spans from Genesis 1:1-2:3 which describes the creation of the heavens and the earth. And then there are ten sections, each of them beginning with the phrase, “these are the generations of…”, or something like it. We are currently in the first of these ten sections.

Remember that in Genesis 2:4 we read, “These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens” (Genesis 2:4, ESV). It is not until Genesis 5:1 that we will again encounter this heading with the words, “This is the book of the generations of Adam… (Genesis 5:1, ESV).

Each of these ten headings found in the book of Genesis names some person or persons and then tells us about their offspring – the generations of Adam; the generations of Noah; the generations of Shem, Ham and Japheth; etc. The one exception is the first of the ten headings, for there it is not a person named, but a place – namely, “the heavens and the earth”. Again, Genesis 2:4 says, “These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens.”

It should be remembered what the phrase “the heavens and earth” is referring to. “Earth”, both in Genesis 1:1 and in 2:4, is a reference to the earthly, physical realm that is visible to us. This is the realm that you and I live in. “Heaven”, both in Genesis 1:1 and 2:4, is a reference to the heavenly, spiritual realm which is presently invisible to us. Therefore, this section that runs from Genesis 2:4 through to 5:1 tells us about that which descended from the earth and heavens which God created in the beginning.

First, we learned that God formed Adam out of the earth. Remember Genesis 2:7: “Then the LORD God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature.” (Genesis 2:7, ESV). After this God formed Eve from Adam. Genesis 2:21-22: “So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man” (Genesis 2:21–22, ESV). What was generated from the earth? Genesis 2:4-25 reveals that the God of heaven brought plants and animals, birds and fish, and supremely Adam and Eve from the earth. We should also remember that God entered into a covenant with the man that he had made. After placing Adam in the garden, and after giving him access to all the plants and trees to have as food, he strictly forbid him from eating from one tree – the tree of the knowledge of good and evil (Genesis 3:15-17). He also gave Adam a task. He was to work and keep the garden (Genesis 3:15). This he was to do for a time. Having successfully accomplished his work he would have been permitted to eat from the tree of life and to enter into glory. What I am saying is that Genesis 2:4 through to 3:1 describes to us the generations of the earth. From the earth God brought forth, among other things, Adam and Eve and entered into a covenant of life with them.

But what about the generations of the heavens? Remember, this section has the heading, “These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens.” What is it that happened in the heavenly realm as it pertains to the story of Holy Scripture?

Now, it must be admitted that our knowledge of the history of the heavenly realm is much more limited than our knowledge of the history of the earthy realm, but God does not leave us entirely in the dark. His word does reveal to us something of the history of heaven.

We know that the heavenly realm was created by God on day one of creation. We know that heaven is God’s throne, the earth his footstool – heaven is where God’s glory is shown forth in splendor. We know that heaven is filled with heavenly hosts, that is to say, angels – seraphim and cherubim. And we know that there was a rebellion in heaven. Jude 6 refers to this rebellion, saying, “And the angels who did not stay within their own position of authority, but left their proper dwelling, [God] has kept in eternal chains under gloomy darkness until the judgment of the great day…” (Jude 6, ESV). In 1 Timothy 5:21 Paul refers to the angels in heaven as “elect angels” indicating that there are also angels who are non-elect and fallen. The scriptures refer to these fallen angels as demons. The prince of these demons is called by many names: Satan, the Devil, Beelzebub, and Lucifer.

In Isaiah 14 we find an oracle concerning the fall of the once powerful king of Babylon. But most would agree that the fall of this earthly king is stated in language reminiscent of the fall of Satan himself, establishing a similitude between the fall of these two powerful beings, one human and the other angelic.

Listen to Isaiah 14:12-16 and keep in mind that this passage is about the fall of the king of Babylon but is stated in such away to remind us of the fall of Satan: “How you are fallen from heaven, O Day Star, son of Dawn! How you are cut down to the ground, you who laid the nations low! You said in your heart, ‘I will ascend to heaven; above the stars of God I will set my throne on high; I will sit on the mount of assembly in the far reaches of the north; I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High.’ But you are brought down to Sheol, to the far reaches of the pit. Those who see you will stare at you and ponder over you: ‘Is this the man who made the earth tremble, who shook kingdoms…” (Isaiah 14:12–16, ESV).

The scriptures are clear that there was a rebellion in the realm of heaven. Some of the angels fell, whereas others kept their proper position as servants of the living God. It appears that Satan led this rebellion, being motivated by envy and pride.

But when did this rebellion in the realm of heaven occur? The answer is that it happened at some point between the end of day six of creation, and the temptation of Adam and Eve as described to us in Genesis 3:1 and following.

In the beginning God created the heavenly realm and the earthly realm.

The earth was at first without form and void and dark.

Job 38:7 tells us that the angels of heaven witnessed the formation of the earth as it is described to us in Genesis 1 and “shouted for joy” when they saw it – this means that the angels must have been created on the first day of creation.

And at the end of day six we are told that “God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good” (Genesis 1:31, ESV). Everything was as good in the heavenly realm and in the earthly realm at the end of day six of creation.

But in Genesis 3:1 we read, “Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’” (Genesis 3:1, ESV).

It is impossible to know for sure how much time elapsed from day six of creation to this act of treason on the part of one of God’s creatures. I tend to think that it was not long at all. But the important thing to notice is that Genesis 3:1 describes an act of rebellion. One of God’s creatures is here found rebelling against its maker.

*****

“Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made.”

In Genesis 3:1 we read the words, “Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made.”

This is an interesting introduction to the narrative that will follow. Clearly, this statement is a reference to a literal snake. The serpent, when compared to all of the of other beasts of the field, is more crafty.

“Crafty” is an appropriate word to use when describing the snake. To be “crafty” is to be subtle and shrewd. The Hebrew word translated by the English word “crafty” does not carry with it positive or negative connotations. In fact, the same Hebrew word is used throughout the Proverbs to describe one who is wise. The wise person is crafty, subtle and shrewd. Craftiness, therefore, can be used for good, and it might also be used for evil. Remember how Christ taught his disciples saying, “Behold, I am sending you out as sheep in the midst of wolves, so be wise as serpents and innocent as doves” (Matthew 10:16, ESV).

Genesis 3:1 is a simple and straightforward statement concerning snakes. Snakes are crafty creatures. They move in quietly. The are well camouflaged. And they are opportunistic predators who lie in wait for their prey. They are even mesmerizing. It is no wonder, then, that Satan – a heavenly and spiritual being – would use the snake – an earthly creature – to bring temptation to Adam and Eve.

*****

“He said to the woman, ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’”

In the second half of verse one something surprising happens. The serpent speaks. “He said to the woman, ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’”

This narrative that we are considering today is very brief, but it is packed full of meaning. Notice a few things about the second half of verse 1:

One, notice that the person at work within the serpent is not named. Clearly, some power is at work within the snake, for snakes do not ordinarily speak. But the person is not named, for he is not worthy of it. He is only called a snake. The rest of the narrative, and the rest of scripture, will make it clear that this is the voice Lucifer.

Two, notice that this is the first voice heard in the narrative that opposes God and his sovereign rule. Up until this point everything was good, indeed very good.

Three, notice that the serpent spoke, not to Adam, but to Eve. This is very significant given that it was Adam who was given the task to “ work… and keep” the garden (Genesis 2:15). Eve was to function as his helper. Here the craftiness of the Evil One is put on display. He subtly entered the garden, appearing out of nowhere. And he approached the woman, avoiding Adam the Federal Head. It is true that Eve could have stomped the head of the serpent. She, as Adams helper, could have resisted the temptation or alerted her husband concerning the intruder. But the tactic of the Evil One is easy to see. He tempted Adam, not directly, but through his wife. The serpent was crafty in his approach.

Four, notice the words of the serpent. “He said to the woman, ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’” The serpent called God’s word into question – “Did God actually say…?” And the serpent also misquoted God ever so slightly. ‘Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?’” Can you recognize the subtlety of the serpent? He began to call into question the goodness and the character of God, not directly, but by way of implication and suggestion. Buried within the serpents carefully crafted question was the subtle suggestion that perhaps God was too harsh, unreasonable and not particularly interested in the ultimate good of Adam and Eve. “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”

I hope that you are beginning to understand the purpose of this text. More than a straightforward retelling of the temptation of the first man and women, this text also gives us insight into the character and the tactics of the Evil One – tactics he uses to this present day. Satan it still eager to undermine our confidence in God’s word and to erode or trust in God as one who is good and generous, gracious and kind. This he often does in subtle and cunning ways, by speaking half truths and by way of suggestion.

*****

“And the woman said to the serpent, ‘We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’”

In Genesis 3:2-3 we find the woman’s reply: “And the woman said to the serpent, ‘We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’”

Notice a few things about Eve’s reply:

One, she does correct the serpent. The serpent suggested that God forbid the man and the woman from eating from any of the trees of garden. Look at how stingy and oppressive God is, was the suggestion of the serpent. He has set you down in the mindst of this lush and fruitful garden and has placed restrictions on you. Eve was right to say, no, “we may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden…’”

Two, notice that Eve does begin to slip a bit as she minimizes God’s generosity. For what did God actually say to Adam? Genesis 2:16: “And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden…” Eve omitted the word “every”, and this is significant.

Three, notice that Eve slips even more when she adds to God’s word saying, “neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” Never did God command Adam and Eve not to touch the tree, only that they should not eat of it.

It is apparent that Eve was on a dangerous path. She should have been much more firm with the serpent. In fact, she should have done what Christ did when tempted by the Evil One in the wilderness. And what did Christ do? Three times over he replied to the lies and the distortions of Satan with the words, “it is written…”, “it is written…”, and finally, “Be gone, Satan! For it is written… ‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve’” (Matthew 4:10, ESV). Eve was far too gentle with the serpent. She allowed him to speak. She gave him a hearing. And her devotion to God began to slip. She began, ever so slightly, to minimize his goodness and to exaggerate his severity.

I wonder if some of you are not on this same path even now. You have listened to the lies of the evil one. You have failed to confront his voice with the word of God. And you have begun to doubt that God is indeed good, and gracious, generous and kind.

*****

“But the serpent said to the woman, ‘You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.’”

In verse 5 the serpent replies to the woman with these words: “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”

Notice that the tactics of the Evil One have transitioned from being sly and subtile, to aggressive and direct. Just as a snake at first moves slowly as it waits for its pray and then quickly strikes when the moment is right, so too the Evil One will tempt us subtly, and only after he has brought us to a vulnerable place will he deliver his deadly blow.

The interesting thing about the words of Satan in verse 5 is that they contain truth — they are half truths, mind you. They are twisted truths. But the words of Satan will prove to be true, in a way.

“You will not surely die”, the serpent said. Notice how direct he is now. Before it was, “has God actually said…” Now it is, “you will not surely die…” — a direct challenge to God’s word. But do see that there was some truth in what the serpent said. God said, “but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die…” (Genesis 2:17, ESV). But as we progress in the narrative we will find that Adam, though he would eat of the forbidden fruit, did not die until he was 930 years old. So, in a way, the serpent was right. Adam and Eve did not immediately die. Of course he was wrong in two respects. One, Adam would eventually dies. And Two, Adam did die in the day that ate of the forbidden fruit — he died spiritually, having been cast out of the garden from the presence of God. This is why Paul could write to Christians who were alive physically and say, “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience…” (Ephesians 2:1–2, ESV). What did Paul mean? These Christians were alive physically, but spiritually they were dead because of sin prior to being brought to faith in Christ. This was true of Adam also. Though he would live for 930 years, he truly died in the day that he ate of the forbidden fruit.

Some of you are living in this state even now. You are alive according to the flesh, but spiritually you are dead because of you sin. Christ can make you alive.

The serpent then said, “For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” This statement also contains truth.

Were the eyes of Adam and Eve opened when they ate of the forbidden fruit? The answer is, yes! But not in the way they expected. After eating of the fruit we read in 3:7 that “the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths” (Genesis 3:7, ESV). Their eyes were opened when they ate, but not unto enlightenment as the serpent had suggested, but unto shame.

And did Adam and Eve become like God, knowing good and evil when they ate? In a sense they did, but not as they expected.

The suggestion of the serpent was that by eating of the forbidden tree the first man and woman would come to experience something greater than what they had experienced up to that point. The implied accusation against God was that he was holding out on them. God forbid them from eating of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil because he knew that if they ate of it they would become as powerful as him. In essence the Evil One managed to make the tree of the knowledge of good and evil seem as if were in fact the tree of life. Satan convinced the couple that by eating of the forbidden tree and abstaining from the the tree of life they would advance to a higher order of life. God was holding out on them. The opposite of what he said was the truth. What Adam and Eve needed to do what to cast off the bonds of their oppressive God and to decide for themselves what is right and what is wrong. Only after obtaining this knowledge would they be truly enlightened, and become gods themselves.

As the narrative unfolds it will become clear that the serpent was a lier. Adam and Eve did not become like God in the way they expected. Instead, the image of God that was theirs by creation was greatly marred. After eating they were still human, but they were fallen humans, given over to death. Clearly, Satan was wrong.

But notice that his words were proven to be true in a sense. In 3:22 we read, “Then the LORD God said, ‘Behold, the man has become like one of us in knowing good and evil. Now, lest he reach out his hand and take also of the tree of life and eat, and live forever—’ therefore the LORD God sent him out from the garden of Eden to work the ground from which he was taken” (Genesis 3:22–23, ESV). There is a sense in which Adam and Eve became like God when they ate, but not as they expected. They took to themselves a right that only God should have, that is to determine that which is good and that which is evil. In this sense, they became like God. But the end was death, and not life.

All who are not in Christ live this way continually, deciding for themselves what is true and false, and what is right and wrong. The one who is in Christ is submits to God in all things and confesses that his word is true.

*****

Conclusion

What difference should this little narrative make in our lives today?

This is more than a story of the temptation of Adam and Eve. In this brief story we see the tactics of the Evil One on display.

Thd child of God would be wise to remember that the Evil One is still at work within the world and that he is crafty — his tactics are still the same.

He will see to undermine God’s word.

He will call into question his goodness towards you.

He will suggest that the good life is found when we cast off God’s restraints and live according to our own standards.

But we should remember that his way is the way of death. Abundant life is found in Christ as we walk in obedience to his commandments.

Our first parents fell. We too have fallen and will fall for the lies of Satan. But we should remember that Christ, who is the second Adam stood strong on our behalf saying, “Be gone, Satan! For it is written… ‘You shall worship the Lord your God and him only shall you serve’” (Matthew 4:10, ESV). This he did faithful to the ned of his life. When he did, he died not for his own sins, but for the sins of those given to him by the Father so that through faith in him we might have life in his name.

Tags: Genesis 3:1-5

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Dec
23

Sermon: John 20:24-31: What does it mean to have faith in Christ?

Scripture Reading: John 20:24-31

“Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, ‘We have seen the Lord.’ But he said to them, ‘Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.’ Eight days later, his disciples were inside again, and Thomas was with them. Although the doors were locked, Jesus came and stood among them and said, ‘Peace be with you.’ Then he said to Thomas, ‘Put your finger here, and see my hands; and put out your hand, and place it in my side. Do not disbelieve, but believe.’ Thomas answered him, ‘My Lord and my God!’ Jesus said to him, ‘Have you believed because you have seen me? Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.’ Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of the disciples, which are not written in this book; but these are written so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name.” (John 20:24–31, ESV)

Introduction

Dear brothers and sisters, I realize that this might seem like an unusual text to highlight on the Sunday prior to Christmas. In fact, if this text were to be associated with one of our traditional holidays it would be associated with Easter – the day upon which the church traditionally gives special attention to the resurrection of Christ – for here in John 20 we encounter the risen Christ.

The reason that I have decided to highlight this particular passage on this Sunday prior to Christmas is so that I might urge you to do more than remember the birth of Christ during this holiday season. Of course, I do hope that you would remember his brith. I hope that you would stand in awe of the wonder of the incarnation. In fact, if you join us on Christmas Eve we will give special attention to the birth of Christ by reading through the narrative of Christ’s brith from one of the Gospels. But as we remember the birth of Christ, I pray that we would also be mindful of his life, his death, his resurrection, his ascension and all that he has accomplished thereby. And, having considered Christ in this way – that is to say, not only Christ in the manger, but also Christ in the world, on the cross, in the tomb, and in the clouds – I pray that you would understand what it is that he has accomplished on behalf of sinners and come to place your faith in him.

Friends, understand that Christ was born into this world in order to accomplish something. His birth marked the beginning of the accomplishment of a mission given to him by God before the world was created.

Christ himself spoke of this mission when he prayed to God before his disciples as recorded for us in John 17, saying, “Father, the hour has come; glorify your Son that the Son may glorify you, since you have given him authority over all flesh, to give eternal life to all whom you have given him. And this is eternal life, that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent. I glorified you on earth, having accomplished the work that you gave me to do. And now, Father, glorify me in your own presence with the glory that I had with you before the world existed. I have manifested your name to the people whom you gave me out of the world. Yours they were, and you gave them to me, and they have kept your word (John 17:1–6, ESV).

When this prayer of Christ is considered in its entirety it is clear that Christ was born into this world to redeem those given to him him by the Father from before the foundation of the world. This was his mission – to accomplish the salvation of God’s elect, to reveal himself to them, and to bring them safely home to the Father.

This is the work that Christ accomplished through his active and passive obedience. He actively kept the law of God. This he did on behalf of sinners like you and me who are unable to keep God’s law for themselves. And Christ also passively obeyed God. He suffered on behalf of sinners like you and me who deserve to suffer because of their sin. Christ suffered in the whole of his life, but particularly on the cross.

We might also say that Christ accomplished the redemption of God’s elect through his humiliation and exultation. He became low for us. He was born into this world and placed in a lowly manger. Indeed, “he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8, ESV). But having died, and having been placed in the grave, this same Christ was also exulted for our redemption. “God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father” (Philippians 2:9–11, ESV).

Brothers and sisters, the Christ was born into this world in order to accomplish the redemption of people from every tongue, tribe and nation. Christ accomplished this redemption when he was born into this world, by his life, his death and resurrection. There is nothing more to be done, for he himself said, “it is finished.”

But the question remains, how do we come to partake of the redemption that Christ has accomplished for us? How does that thing that Christ has earned for his elect come to be theirs? How do lay ahold of, or benefit from, what Christ has purchased?

This question should sound familiar to you, for it is a question raised by our catechism. The answer comes in two stages.

Question 32 of the Batist Catechism asks, “How are we made partakers of the redemption purchased by Christ?” And the answer given is that “We are made partakers of the redemption purchased by Christ, by the effectual application of it to us, by His Holy Spirit.”

This is a good and biblical answer. God the Father sent to the Son to earn our redemption. God the Son came to accomplished our redemption. And God the Holy Spirit is the one who applies the redemption that Christ has earned to the elect of God by his effectual calling.

Question 33 brings more clarity to the issue by asking, “How [does] the Spirit apply to us the redemption purchased by Christ?” And the answer is that “The Spirit [applies] to us the redemption purchased by Christ, by working faith in us, and thereby uniting us to Christ in our effectual calling.”

Notice two things about these questions and answers:

First of all, in order for a person to partake of the redemption purchased by Christ, the Spirit of God must do a work within them and upon them. This is the true teaching of Holy Scripture. Man, now that he is fallen into sin, is said to be spiritually blind, deaf, lame, and dead. Left to ourselves we do not naturally run to God, but away from him. Indeed, now that we are fallen, we are inclined by nature “to hate God and [our] neighbor” (see Heidelberg q. 5). Do fallen humans have the ability to make free choices and to act upon those choices? Yes they do! But do to they have the ability to run after God, to please him, or to believe upon him? No, we do not have this ability within ourselves naturally, now that that we are fallen into sin.

This is why Christ himself said, “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him. And I will raise him up on the last day” (John 6:44, ESV). And again “he said, ‘This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted him by the Father” (John 6:65, ESV). If any one come to Christ it is only because the Father has granted this privilege to him. If anyone comes to Christ it is only because the Father has drawn that person to himself. And how does the Father draw sinners to himself? We know that it is through the preaching of the gospel and by the effective working and wooing of the Holy Spirit.

Do you remember the words of Christ spoken to that man Nicodemus as recorded in John 3? Nicodemus came to Jesus by night wondering about how he might enter God’s kingdom. And what did Jesus say to him? “Jesus answered him, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born again he cannot see the kingdom of God’” (John 3:3, ESV). And again, “Jesus answered, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, unless one is born of water and the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit” (John 3:5–6, ESV). For a person to “see” and for a person to “enter” God’s kingdom the Spirit of God must do a work upon them. That person must first be born again. Why? Because we are by nature dead in our trespasses and sins and unable to do that which is necessary to enter into God’s kionghdom.

This is why Paul said what he said to the Christians living in Ephesus. In Ephesians 2:1 we read, “And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world… “ And a little bit later he says that these Christians “were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 2:1–7, ESV).

If a person is to partake of the redemption purchased by Christ the Spirit of God must do a work in them and upon them. The Spirit must make them alive to God. And the Spirit must draw them to Christ.

Secondly, notice that Baptist Catechism question 33 indicates that there is something we must do. It is true that God must do a work in us by the power of his Holy Spirit, but it is also true that there is something for us to do, namely believe.

Listen again to Baptist Catechism question 33 which asks, “How [does] the Spirit apply to us the redemption purchased by Christ?” The answer: “The Spirit [applies] to us the redemption purchased by Christ, by working faith in us, and thereby uniting us to Christ in our effectual calling.”

What is it that unites us to Christ? What is it that brings about our actual partaking of the redemption purchased by Christ? Stated differently, what is that turns a guilty sinner into a saved sinner – a child of wrath into a child of God? The scriptures are clear (and our catechism is correct) that faith is the instrument that brings about our enjoyment of the redemption that Christ has accomplished for us.

Christ accomplished the redemption of the elect long ago – this is true, and this is finished.

And the Spirit of God must regenerate and effectually call sinners if they are to come to Christ – this also is true, but this work is not finished. “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him”, Christ said. And the Spirit of God is still at work, renewing sinners and calling them to repentance.

And it also true that faith – that is, the ability to believe upon Christ – is a gift from God. Did you hear our Catechism? “The Spirit [applies] to us the redemption purchased by Christ, by working faith in us, and thereby uniting us to Christ in our effectual calling.” The Spirit is the one who works faith in us. This agrees with the words of the Apostle Paul who said, “For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast” (Ephesians 2:8–9, ESV). Faith – that is, the ability believe in Christ – is a gift from God. It is something that the Spirit of God works in us.

But let me ask you, who is the one that must do the believing? Is it God or man? The answer should be obvious to all. It is man who must believe if he or she is to partake of the redemption purchased by Christ. Faith is gift from God – this is true. But faith is something that must be exercised by the human if he or she is to be saved.

This is the clear teaching of scripture. We find the scriptures everywhere urging men and women, boys and girls to turn from their sins and to believe upon Christ for the forgivness of sins. Do you remember the question that the Philippian jailer asked of Paul and Silas? “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” And what was their answer? “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.” (Acts 16:31, ESV)

And perhaps you noticed that this was very reason that the Apostle John stated for the writing of his Gospel when he said, “Now Jesus did many other signs in the presence of the disciples, which are not written in this book; but these are written so that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name” (John 20:30–31, ESV).

The Son has accomplished our redemption according to the will of the Father. The Spirit is applying the redemption earned by Christ to the elect. But men and women, boys and girls must be urged to believe. And that is what I am doing on this Sunday before Christmas – I am urging you to believe upon Jesus the Christ who was lain in a manger at the time of his birth; who lived and died and rose again for sinneres; who ascended to the Fathers right hand, from wince he will one day return to judge the world in righteousness.

But let me raise another question – and this will be the question that we focus on for the remainder of this sermon. What does it mean to have faith in Christ? What does having true and saving faith involve. I have four brief points to make.

I. To have true and saving faith you must know the gospel.

First of all, to have true and saving faith you must know the gospel.

I wish for the emphasis to be upon the word “know”. To have true and saving faith a person must know certain things.

I have noticed that some in the world talk about faith as if the only thing that matters is that you have some faith, that is faith… in something. The important thing is that you believe… in something, they say. It is as if the act of believing in something… anything at all, is what matters.

But that is not what the scriptures mean when they say, “by grace you have been saved through faith.” True and saving faith is faith in something particular. Even more specifically, true and saving faith is faith someone particular, namely Jesus the Christ.

It should be recognized that the scriptures often use the word faith to refer, not to the act of believing, but to a collection of set doctrines. For example, when Jude wrote to Christians regarding their common salvation he appealed to them to “contend for the faith that was once for all delivered to the saints” (Jude 3, ESV). This has always been the case for Christians. To have faith in Christ means, among other things, to enter into the the faith, that is to know (and believe) the collection of doctrines that Christ entrusted to his apostles, and they to us.

The simple point that I am making is that knowledge matters. Doctrine matters.

To believe in something does not bring you salvation if the something you are believing in is the wrong thing, even if you believe in that thing strongly.

To have true and saving faith you must know the gospel, which is is the good news of Jesus the Christ. And if the good new of Jesus Christ is to be understand, the story that is told in the Bible from beginning to end must be understood.

Let me state the gospel succinctly. The gospel is that Jesus the Christ has atoned for his death and resurrection so that sinners, through faith in him, might have their sins forgiven and be reconciled to God the Father. That is the gospel stated succinctly – very succinctly – perhaps too succinctly. But do you see that a person must know something of the message of the Bible from beginning to end if they are to understand even this succinct gospel message.

Without any knowledge of the Bible the will have to ask, who is God the Father? What is sin? Why must my sins be atoned for by another? Why through the shedding of blood? Who is this Jesus and why is he called the Christ? Etc., etc.

The point that I am making is that in order for faith to be true and saving faith certain truths must be known and understood.

And what in particular must we know for our faith to be true and saving faith? This is neither the time nor the place to give a thorough answer to that question. My intention here is simply to make that point that knowledge does matter. But some of the creeds and confessions of the church are helpful here.

Our Orthodox Catechism, which is very much like the better known, Heidelberg Catechism, asks this in question 22: “What then must a Christian believe? The answer: “Everything God promises us in the gospel. That gospel is summarized for us in the articles of our Christian faith–a creed beyond doubt, and confessed throughout the world.” And then question 23 asks, “What are these articles?” The answer: “I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth. I believe in Jesus Christ, his only Son, our Lord, who was conceived by the Holy Spirit and born of the virgin Mary. He suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died, and was buried; he descended to hell. The third day he rose again from the dead. He ascended to heaven and is seated at the right hand of God the Father almighty. From there he will come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy catholic (not Rome, but universal) church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and the life everlasting. Amen.” This is the so-called Apostles Creed. It has provided the church with a brief summery of essential Christian doctrine for a long, long time now.

And so I ask you, do you know the gospel? Do know what the word of God teaches concerning God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Do you know what the scriptures have to say regarding our great sin and misery? Do you know what the Bible says about Jesus the Christ – his birth, life, death, burial, resurrection, ascension and the significance of these things? For some of you, now is the time for you to grow in you knowledge of these basic and essential truths.

You cannot say that you have faith if you do not know these things. It may be that you have true faith even if your knowledge of these doctrines is small and limited, but you cannot say that your faith is true if your knowledge of the teaching of holy scripture is non-existent. Furthermore, I wonder if there is not a correlation between strong faith and a deep knowledge of these truths, and weak faith and a meager knowledge of these truths.

Do you know the word of God? Do you know the gospel of God?

II. To have true and saving faith you must believe that the gospel is true.

Secondly, to have true and saving faith you must believe that the gospel is true.

Here I simply wish to point out that there are many in the world who know the teaching of Holy Scripture and yet do not believe it. These have knowledge, but they do not have faith.

It appears that our friend Thomas was in this place for a while. He had heard the word that Jesus had risen from the grave – he had been exposed to true doctrine having sat under the teaching of Jesus for three years – but he did not believe it, at least not for a time. “Now Thomas, one of the twelve, called the Twin, was not with them when Jesus came. So the other disciples told him, ‘We have seen the Lord.’ But he said to them, ‘Unless I see in his hands the mark of the nails, and place my finger into the mark of the nails, and place my hand into his side, I will never believe.’” (John 20:24–25, ESV)

I suppose there are many in this world who have been exposed to the teaching of Holy Scripture, perhaps by their parents, by some other, or by their own reading of the text, who refuse to believe that what it says is true. These have knowledge, but they do not have faith. These might even know a great deal about the scriptures. Perhaps their knowledge of the Bible is even greater than yours and mine, and yet they refuse to agree with its teaching. Knowledge does not save, friends. Faith does. Not only must we know the Bible, we must agree with its teaching and submit to it.

III. To have true and saving faith you must trust in Christ as offered in the gospel.

Thirdly, to have true and saving faith you must trust in Christ as offered to us in the gospel.

Let me quote R.C. Sproul here. He writes, “The crucial, most vital element of saving faith in the biblical sense, is that of personal trust… [that is] a fiduciary [trusting] commitment by which I put my life in the lap of Jesus. I trust him and him alone for my salvation. That is the crucial element, and it includes the intellectual and the mental. But it goes beyond it to the heart and to the will so that the whole person is caught up in this experience we call faith” (Excerpt from, “What Does It Mean to Believe?” by R.C. Sproul).

Friends, do you see that it is possible to know what the Bible teaches, and even to agree intellectually with what the Bible teaches, but to not have saving faith because there is no personal trust in Christ. If there is no putting your “life in the lap of Jesus”, to quote Sproul, then there is no true and saving faith. To have true faith in Christ is to say from the heart, I am in great need, and no one and nothing can meet that need except Christ alone. I set all of my hope and place all of my trust in him for my salvation.

I sometimes wonder how many people gather with Christ’s church even on a weekly basis who have this kind of false faith. They have head knowledge – maybe even a lot of it. And they truly think that the things they they know are true and factual, which is fine and good. But they do not trust in Christ and in Christ alone. Instead their hope is set upon some other thing – perhaps their own righteousness.

IV. Obedience to God’s commands is evidence of true and saving faith.

Fourthly, and lastly, obedience to God’s commands is evidence of true and saving faith.

Here I wish to very briefly address the question that some of you might be thinking, which is, how can I know that I have true and saving faith? This is the question of assurance. How can I have a sense of assurance that I really do know Christ, and that my faith is true?

In a way this question is not difficult to answer.

Let me ask you, do you know the teaching of Holy Scripture? Do you know the gospel? Do you understand it intellectually?

Furthermore, do you confess that the teaching of Holy Scripture is indeed true?

And more than that, have you placed your trust in Christ? Are you believing upon him for the forgiveness of your sins, resting and hoping in him alone and the work that he has accomplished for you? Have you confessed that Jesus is Lord through the waters of baptism according to the command of Christ?

If so, then it seems to me that your faith is true.

But you and I know that some who answer all of these questions in the affirmative may still struggle with assurance. True Christians may struggle with confidence concerning the genuineness of their faith, even after answering “yes” to the questions stated above.

How is it that we grow in our assurance that our faith is true and that we know Christ truly?

The scriptures do speak to this issue. In essence they say that obedience to God’s commands is evidence of true and saving faith.

I could take you to that famous Matthew 7 passage where Jesus says, “You will recognize them by their fruits” (Matthew 7:15–23, ESV). In that text Jesus is talking about how to identify false teachers, but the principle applies. Just as a good tree will produce good fruit, and a bad tree bad fruit, so too the one who is truly in Christ will produce Christlike fruit.

We could also go to that passage in James 2 where James says that faith without works is dead. Clearly, there is a kind of faith that is true and a kind that is untrue (dead). “Even the demons believe and tremble”, James says. In other words, even the demons have a kind of faith. They know all about God and Christ. But clearly they do not trust in and follow after Christ, bearing fruit in keeping with repentance. Obviously the faith of the demons is not true and saving faith, but this is the kind of faith that many in the world have – fruitless faith; faith without works – this kind of faith is dead.

My favorite passage on the subject of assurance is 1 John 2:3-6 which says, “And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments…” And a little further on John says, “by this we may know that we are in him: whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked”. It is clear that the Apostle is addressing the issue of assurance here. “And by this we know that we have come to know him”, he says. If I were to rephrase that into a question it would sound like this – “how can a person know that they know Christ truly?” Or “how can a person be sure that their faith in Christ is true?” And what answer does the Apostle give? “…if we keep his commandments…” And again, if we “…walk in the same way in which he walked”.

The same Apostle is clear that true Christians do struggle will sin. No Christian is perfect in his or keeping of the commandments of God. None walk in the way that Christ walked perfectly. With that said, the point the Apostle is making is the same one that Jesus made – true Christians will be known by their fruits. Holy living is an evidence of a heart that has been made holy by the grace of God. Christlike living is a testimony to a true and lively faith.

Conclusion

As we consider baby Jesus this Christmas season may we also consider the whole of his life, his death, burial resurrection and ascension. May we stand in awe, not only of the virgin birth and the incantation, but also of all that Christ has accomplished for those given to him by the Father from before the foundation of the world. And having considered all that Christ has accomplished – namely, our redemption – may be never forget how it is that we come to partake of the redemption purchased by Christ. It is through faith in him. Faith it is a grace, this is true. But it is something that we must exercise.

Friends, I am calling you to place your faith in Christ. I am calling you, just as the scriptures do, to turn from your sins and to believe upon Christ for the forgiveness of your sins.

If you are in Christ, I am calling you to persevere in the faith and to urge other to believe as well. May the Lord give us opportunity to do that very thing this Christmas season. As we set our attention upon the baby Jesus may we have opportunity to say to ourselves and to others, “behold the Lamb of God who has taken away the sins of the world. Believe upon him for the forgiveness of your sins.”

Tags: John 20:24-31

Posted in Sermons John 20:24-31
Comments Off on Sermon: John 20:24-31: What does it mean to have faith in Christ? Posted by Joe

Dec
16

Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Remarriage

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24–25

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:24–25, ESV)

New Testament Reading: Mark 10:2-12

“And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?’ He answered them, ‘What did Moses command you?’ They said, ‘Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.’ And Jesus said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.’ And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’” (Mark 10:2–12, ESV)

*****

Introduction

In the introduction to the previous sermon I mentioned that there was a time when I held to permanence view of marriage, which is the view that the one flesh union established by God in the marriage covenant lasts for life, death being the only thing that can dissolve it. Back in 2010 I preached a sermon stating that though divorce is permitted under some circumstances, remarriage is not (at least not until the death of the spouse). No longer do I hold to that view. I had doubts about it shortly after preaching that sermon in 2010, those doubts grew progressively stronger, I abandoned the permanence view a few years ago, and am now publicly disavowing it as I present a view that I believe to me true to teaching of scripture.

If you were to compare what I stated last week and what I am about to say today with the statements that I made all those years ago you would probably be struck by the similarities between the two positions. Truly, the view that I held to then and the view that I hold to now do share many things in common, but the point of difference is very significant.

Is divorce ever permitted? Both then and now I say, though God’s revealed will is that marriage is to last for life, divorce is permitted in the case of the sin of adultery or when a believing spouse is abandoned by a non-believing spouse.

Does a Christian sin if he or she files for divorce? Both then and now I say, the Christian does not sin if they divorce with biblical grounds. When the scriptures say that “God hates divorce” it is in reference to divorce that is unjust and without biblical grounds. God hates divorce because divorce is always the result of some sin. But not everyone who divorces sins, for sometimes divorce is justified according to the scriptures.

And does a Christian sin if he or she remarries after divorce? Here is where my view has changed. Back in 2010 I said yes, for the one flesh union remains for life. A certificate of divorce may protect the innocent husband or wife, but it does not dissolve the one flesh union. Only death can do that. But now, when asked does a Christian sin if he or she remarries after divorce? I say, it depends. It depends on whether or not the divorce was valid according to the scriptures. To divorce without biblical grounds and to remarry is to commit adultery. But when a person divorces with biblical grounds, he or she is free to remarry, for the valid divorce does in fact bring the marriage to covenant to an end.

When is a Christian permitted to divorce according to the scriptures? Last week we learned that the Christian is permitted, but not required, to divorce if their spouse has committed adultery. Also, the Christian is permitted to divorce if they have been abandoned by a non-believing spouse. These are the two grounds for divorce stated in the New Testament for the New Covenant people of God. And what I am saying now is that if the divorce was with biblical grounds, remarriage is permitted given that a valid divorce does indeed put an end to the marriage bond.

Let us consider these things more carefully in two points: One, ordinarily, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery. And two, remariage is permitted if the divorce was valid and with biblical grounds.

*****

I. Ordinarily, To Divorce And Remarry Is To Commit Adultery

First of all it must be understood that ordinarily, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery. This is the clear teaching of the New Testament. Ordinarily, and as a general rule, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery.

There are few New Testament texts that we need to consider which clearly communicate this general rule. And ask we consider these texts perhaps you will understand why the permanence view of marriage seemed compelling to me all those years ago.

First, let consider two passages which state, without exception, that to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery.

The first is Mark 10:10-12. Remember the context. Jesus was being pressed by some Pharisees concerning his view on divorce and remarriage. In Mark 10:2 we read, “And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?’” Jesus’ answer was clear. Moses permitted divorce due to the hardness of their hearts,“but from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh.” Jesus stated the ideal that the marriage covenant last for life. And then we read these words in verse 10, “And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. And he said to them, ‘Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.’”

Jesus taught that for a man or woman to divorce his or her husband or wife and to marry another is to commit adultery. No exception is found in this text.

Something similar is communicated in Luke 16:18. There we hear the words of Christ, “Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.”

The same principle that was communicated in Mark 10 is also communicated here – the one who divorces and remarries commits adultery. But notice that something different is communicated in the second half of Luke 16:18 – “he who marries a woman divorced from her husband [also] commits adultery”. Notice that no exception is stated in this text.

And so after reading Mark 10 and Luke 16 we are left with this understanding of the subject of divorce and remarriage – to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery, and to marry one who has been divorced is to commit adultery. In other words everyone agrees that when a husband or wife steps out on their spouse and joins themself to another sexually, it is adulterous. But Jesus’ view is that to divorce and to join yourself to another, even if it be in the bonds of a another marriage covenant, is also to commit adultery.

Can you see why I have said that “ordinarily, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery”? And can you see why some hold to the permanence view of marriage which I myself held to for a time? These two passages clearly teach that marriage is to last for life, and to that ordinarily, to divorce and to remarry is to commit adultery.

The question that we must ask is, are there any exceptions to this general rule? Are there any circumstances where a husband or wife would be permitted to divorce and also free to remarry?

There are two other New Testament texts that we must consider. And it must be recognized that these two texts do cite exceptions to the general rule established in Mark 10 and Luke 16, that ordinarily to be divorced and to remarry is to commit adultery.

The first is Matthew 5:31-32. There we hear Christ saying, “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” (Matthew 5:31–32, ESV)

First of all, notice that Matthew 5 perfectly agrees with what is found in Mark 10 and Luke 16. Mathew 5 clearly states that to marry a divorces woman is to commit adultery (by the way, it reasonable to understand each of the texts as applying both to men and women husbands and wives – the scriptures apply the same standards to each). So again, Mathew 5 clearly states that to marry a divorced person is to commit adultery. It also says that when a husband divorces his wife he “makes her commit adultery”. What does that mean? It means that when a husband divorces his wife he puts her in a very difficult position. She will likely remarry (at least this would be the norm in Jesus’ day), and when she remarries she would commit adultery.

But there is an exception to this rule. “Except on the grounds of sexual immorality”, the texts says. Listen again to 5:32: “But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery…” Why the exception? Well, in this case it is obvious. If the wife was sexually immoral then she has already committed adultery. It cannot be said, therefore, that the husband makes her to commit adultery when he divorces her, for she has already done it. The husband does not do wrong when he divorces his wife because of her sexual immorality, and neither does a wife do wrong if she divorces her husband because he is an adulterer. This is how we are to understand the exception clause of Matthew 5.

There is one last text that we must consider: Matthew 19:8-9. This text also contains an exception clause. And this exception clause makes it clear that the one who divorces his or her spouse on the grounds of sexual immorality (adultery) is also free to remarry. Listen again to the words of Christ as he interacted with the Pharisees concerting the topic of divorce and remarriage. “He said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives [that is, under the Old Covenant and according to Deuteronomy 24], but from the beginning it was not so [according to Genesis 2:24-25]. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.’”

This passage also agrees with all the others. Ordinarily, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery. Stated differently, to divorce without grounds – that is, to divorce for no good reason according to the scriptures – and to marry again is to commit adultery. But what is the exception? “Except for sexual immorality”. If a spouse commits sexual immorality her or she commits adultery. The Greek word translated “sexual immorality” is πορνεία. It is used interchangeably with the Greek word translated as “adultery”, which is μοιχεία, throughout the LXX (the Greek translation of the Hebrew Old Testament). What I am saying is that πορνεία and μοιχεία are nearly synonymous. For a married person to commit the sin of sexual immorality means that they have been adulterous. Adultery is grounds for divorce. And if one has divorced because of sexual immorality, he or she is also free to remarry.

What is the general rule communicated in each of these passages?

Ordinarily, to divorce and remarry is to commit adultery.

But are there exceptions to this general rule?

Yes, the exception is when the divorce is the result of the sin of sexual immorality. In that case the innocent spouse does not sin when he or she divorces and remarries.

Friends, it was as true in Jesus’ day as it is our own – many divorces are for no good reason. Men in Jesus’ day, and men and women in our day, often divorce for no good reason and then marry another. This is what Jesus called adulterous. This was the kind of divorce that Malachi the prophet said that God hates. To divorce for no good reason and to remarry is to commit adultery. This is the clear and undeniable teaching of holy scripture.

But more needs to be said.

*****

II. Remariage Is Permitted If The Divorce Was Valid And With Biblical Grounds

Secondly, it must be admitted that remarriage is permitted if the divorce was valid and with biblical grounds.

If the divorce was the result of marital infidelity then remarriage is permitted.

This is clearly communicated by the exception clause of Matthew 19:9 which again says, “whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

Why isn’t that exception included in Mark 10 and Luke 16? Because the focus of those passages is slightly different. There in those passages remarriage after illegitimate divorce is the thing being condemned. There a general rule is established. But sometimes there are exceptions to general rules. And the exceptions only need to be stated once for the exceptions to be valid.

As a general rule it is wrong to take a human life. Generally, this is called murder. But there are exceptions to this rule. Think of self defense, righteous war, and capital punishment. These are exceptions to the rule, and those who take a life in these circumstances are not guilty of the sin of murder. Do the exceptions have to be stated every time the scriptures forbid murder? No! But the exceptions stand even if they stated only once.

And here is where the permanence view of marriage begins to break down in my mind. It does not adequately account for the exception clause Matthew 19. Yes, I am aware of the argument that Matthew 19 has divorce during the betrothal period in view, and not divorce during marriage. But that interpretation seems very strained to me now. In the context the Pharisees are clearly asking about divorce in the context of marriage, and not betrothal. I am also aware that some claim there is a significant difference between the terms πορνεία and μοιχεία. This argument also begins to crumble under closer scrutiny. And there are still others that try to do away with the exception clause by arguing against it from textual criticism. But none of these arguments seem compelling to me now.

It is better that we allow the exception clause of Matthew 19 to stand.

The New Covenant exception of divorce and remarriage being permitted in the case of adultery makes perfect sense given the transition from the Old Covenant to the New. Under the Old Covenant divorce was permitted for more reasons than adultery given the hardness of Israel’s heart, whereas the sin of adultery was to punished bye death. Under the New Covenant the penalty for adultery is relaxed given the new distinction between church and state – the church does not wield the sword under the New Covenant, remember. But the grounds for divorce are greatly restricted. The New Covenant people of God should not have hard hearts, for under the New Covenant all of God’s people have his “law within them” for he writes “it on their hearts” and they “shall all know [him], from the least of them to the greatest, declares the LORD” (Jeremiah 31:33-34, ESV). What I am saying that divorce and remarriage being permitted in the case of adultery makes perfect sense given the transition of the Old Covenant to the New.

The scriptures are clear, remariage is permitted if the divorce was valid and with biblical grounds, and the sin of adultery is valid grounds for divorce.

Paul is also clear that the Christian who has been abandoned by a non-Christian is free to let them go (permit the divorce) and to remarry.

Listen to Paul’s word s in 1 Corinthians 7:12. “To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.” (1 Corinthians 7:12–16, ESV)

Here is the principle that seems to underly the biblical teaching on the subject of divorce and remarriage. The one flesh union is not what makes a marriage a marriage, but the marriage covenant is the thing that makes a marriage a marriage, and the marriage covenant is breakable.

Notice that not all one flesh unions are permanent.

“Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, ‘The two will become one flesh’” (1 Corinthians 6:16, ESV). But a man does not enter into marriage with a prostitute when he becomes one flesh with her, for there is no covenant. And this is what make sexual intimacy outside of marriage such a sinful and destructive thing. The one flesh union is to be enjoyed within the bounds of the marriage covenant. The covenant is what makes the union lasting. Without the covenant the union is only temporary.

Notice that the marriage covenant is a breakable covenant. What do a husband and wife do when the take their vows. Do they not promise to be faithful to one another in good times and in bad, till death do them part? This promise should not be broken, but sometimes it is. And this corresponds to what Jesus said concerning marriage. “‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:5–6, ESV). Notice Christ did not say that they could not be separated, but that they should not be. Husband and wife should enjoy their one flesh union for life. This is made possible through the marriage covenant, and that covenant should not be broken.

One last point needs to made in support of the possibility of remarriage after a divorce that is valid. God himself is divorced and remarried. Here I have in mind those Old Testament passages that speak of God divorcing Israel for her unfaithfulness and the fact that God has entered into a New Covenant.

Take for example Jeremiah 3:6-8. The the prophet writes, “The LORD said to me in the days of King Josiah: ‘Have you seen what she did, that faithless one, Israel, how she went up on every high hill and under every green tree, and there played the whore? And I thought, ‘After she has done all this she will return to me,’ but she did not return, and her treacherous sister Judah saw it. She saw that for all the adulteries of that faithless one, Israel, I had sent her away with a decree of divorce. Yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear, but she too went and played the whore” (Jeremiah 3:6–8, ESV).

Throughout the Old Testament the sin of idolatry is compared to the sin of adultery. When God’s people are idolatrous – when they run after other god’s instead of being faithful to their God, the one true God – it is like when a wife is unfaithful to her husband. Israel was spiritually adulterous. And what did God do? After being patient with her for a very long time he did finally divorce her and enter into a New Covenant.

If divorce and remarriage were always sinful for us then it would be a very inappropriate to speak of God as one who had divorced his people and married another. And yet this is what he has done. He has divorced Old Covenant Israel and has entered into a New Covenant with people from every tongue, tribe and nation.

Clearly, there is such a thing as a valid divorce. And when divorce is valid, then remarriage is permitted.

*****

Conclusion

As I have said before it is one thing to understand the teaching of scripture on this subject, but it is another thing altogether to apply this teaching to the often difficult, complicated and messy situations that people get themselves into. The application of these truths is the more difficult thing, in my opinion.

Some situations are rather black and white.

For example, if a husband or wife has committed adultery and is unrepentant then it quite clear that there will be a divorce and that the innocent party is free to remarry. I believe that the innocent party should proceed with great caution, but I am saying that the innocent party does not sin when he or she divorces, and that they are free to remarry in a black and white situation such as this (Matthew 19).

The same can be said of a situation where a Christian is abandoned by a non-believing spouse. “If the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace” (1 Corinthians 7:15, ESV). This is black and white.

But many situations are more complicated than these.

What if, for example, a husband or wife has committed adultery but appears to be truly repentant? I will say again what I said last Sunday – the innocency spouse is permitted to divorce, but they may also choose to remain in the marriage. True forgiveness will need to be extended. The couple will need to work diligently to restore the marriage and to rebuild trust. At some point the innocent party will need to lay aside his or her right to divorce. Certainly the church will need to be involved. Pastoral care will be needed.

And what if, for example, two Christians separate from one another but with without biblical grounds? Should the Christians be separated? Well, no they should not, for they do not have grounds. Listen to Paul’s words: “To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:10–11, ESV). If you are Christian and you have separated from or even divorced your spouse without biblical grounds, and if neither of you have remarried, you are not free to remarry, but should have reconciliation as your only goal.

And what if a Christian husband or wife has been abandoned, not by an unbeliever, as in the situation addressed by Paul in 1 Corinthians 7:15, but by a spouse who claims to be a Christian. Here is a situation that illustrates why it is so important to be a part of a church that exercises biblical church discipline. If a person claims to be a Christian and has separated from his or her spouse without biblical grounds, then church discipline must be done according to Matthew chapter 18. And if the one who claims to be a Christians and has abandoned his or her spouse without grounds will not repent when called by the church to repent then that one should eventually be put out of the church and be viewed as a non-believer, for with their mouth they claim to be one of God’s people, but by their fruit the prove not to be. Then, after the process of church discipline is carefully, patiently and lovingly carried out, the one who has been abandoned would be free to go through with the divorce and to remarry, for in fact he or she has been abandoned, not by a believer, but by an unbeliever. This is what Paul directly addresses in 1 Corinthians 7.

And what about abuse within the marriage relationship. Is abuse grounds for divorce? I hesitate to even bring this up because I know that some will be tempted to misuse what I am about to say. Let me be clear – I am talking about real abuse here. I am not referring to an unhappy marriage. I am not referring to a marriage that is marked by conflict. I am here referring to a truly abusive relationship, either emotionally or physically. Determining what constitutes emotional abuse can be difficult. Here is why these situations should be dealt with with the help of others. If there is emotional abuse the church can help. If there is physical abuse the church should be involved, but also the civil authorities. A Christian is not obligated to remain in a truly abusive situation but is right to remove themselves from it, especially to protect the children if they are present. It is our opinion that abuse may fall under the category of abandonment as mentioned in 1 Corinthians 7. In other words, we believe that it is possible for a person to thoroughly abandon the marriage covenant while at the same time refusing to leave the home. I have seen it. Why would someone do such a thing? I’ll tell you. Some care about the opinions of those within the church and community. They abuse behind closed doors, but they don’t leave. If they left people would think poorly of them, and so they remain and hide their sin. Others enjoy the benefits that come along with the marriage relationship. They enjoy the intimacy, the meals, the nicely kept home, and so they abuse and yet refuse to leave the home. Other reason could be given. These situations are very complex, friends, and we should proceed with caution, but a Christian is not obligated to remain in a situation where he or she is truly being abused.

And what about a Christian with and invalid divorce in his or her past. Perhaps the divorce happened while a young Christian, or perhaps it happened while an unbeliever. I would ask, have you been remarried? Has your former husband or wife been remarried? If the answer is no, then it may be that pursuing reconciliation would be appropriate. But even this is questionable. Were you both unbelievers when you divorced? Are you a Christian now and he or she an unbeliever? If so, then I probably would not recommend that you remarry, for then you would be a Christian marrying a non-Christian, which the scriptures forbid. Have they remarried, our have you? If so, then there is nothing to be done except to confess you sin and to seek for forgiveness for wrongs committed. Once new unions have been forged, they should not be undone. Also, the scriptures forbid taking a spouse back once they have married another, which is the point of Deuteronomy 24.

And what about a Christian with an adulterous past? It should be remembered that though the sin of adultery has it’s consequences, adultery is not an unforgivable sin. Some will reason to themselves, if adultery is forgivable, then I’d might as well commit it. But such is the thinking of a wicked and godless person. If you have committed adultery, turn from your sin and believe upon Christ. Pursue him with all that you are from this day forward. There may be consequences to your sin that never go away, but adultery is not an unforgivable sin.

Brothers and sisters, as our culture continue to deteriorate around us, the church must pursue holiness. My belief is that the gap between conservative churches and liberal “churches” is only going to grow wider in the decades to come. By conservative I mean those churches that believe that the scriptures are the words of God and are to govern our beliefs and our practices. And by liberal I mean those traditions (I do not believe that they are Christian, but are another religion all tother) who’s doctrine and practice are governed, not by the word of God, but by other things: rationalism, pragmatism, societal evolution and the like. The gap between these traditions is only going to grow wider as our culture deteriorates more and more. Those who are conservative will remain where they are, and those who are liberal will follow the world wherever it goes. And I believe that our view of marriage will be a central issue in the decades to come. And here is why I have devoted nine sermons to the topic of marriage, divorce and remarriage.

Brothers and sisters, may our marriages be distinctly Christian. May we define marriage as scripture defines it. May we understand the purpose of marriage – that is the glory of God and of Christ. May we live holy within our marriage relationship, fulfilling the roles that God has called us to take as husband and wife. And if the issue of divorce and remarriage should arise within our midst, may our divorces and our remarriages also be governed by God’s most holy word.

May the Lord help us in these things and receive all the glory, honor and praise. Amen.

Posted in Study Guides
Comments Off on Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Remarriage Posted by Joe

Dec
9

Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Divorce

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24–25

New Testament Reading: Matthew 19:1-9

“Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there. And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, ‘Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?’ He answered, ‘Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.’ They said to him, ‘Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?’ He said to them, ‘Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:1–9, ESV)

*****

Introduction

Over the years I have preached many sermons. And there have been many times when after having preached a sermon I thought to myself, I could have preached that text or that topic much better than I did. I readily admit it, I have preached some poor sermons. But there was one sermon that I preached years ago that I wish I had never preached. That sermon was on the text of Matthew 19 and on the subject of divorce and remarriage.

I actually dug up the outline to that sermon and found that it was dated August 22, 2010, about a year prior to the founding of Emmaus. In that sermon on Matthew 19 and on the topic of divorce and remarriage I presented something like what is called the “permanence view” of marriage. In essence the permanence view is that the one flesh union established by God in the marriage covenant is permanent, death being the only thing that can dissolve it. And so although divorce may be permitted under certain circumstances, remarriage never is, for the one flesh union remains intact until the death of one of the spouses. To divorce and remarry under any and all circumstances, therefore, is to commit adultery according to the permanence view.

J. Carl Laney is a proponent of the permanence view. Listen to how he defines marriages in his book, “No Divorce and No Remarriage”. Marriage is “God’s act of joining a man and a woman in a permanent, covenanted, one-flesh relationship” (Laney, 20). In the same book he also says, “I believe Scripture teaches that marriage was designed by God to be permanent unto death, and that divorce and remarriage constitute the sin of adultery” (Laney, 16). John Piper is also a proponent of the permanence view of marriage. His view is that the “New Testament [prohibits]… all remarriage except in the case where a spouse has died” (Piper, Divorce and Remarriage: A Position Paper).

As I have said, I wish that I had never preached that sermon. Over the past eight years I have come to see that my knowlede of the subject was very limited and my study was rushed. If my memory is correct the one thing I did do in that sermon that brings me some comfort was to acknowledging that I was not sure of myself and could be wrong. I preached being open and honest about my uncertainty. Actually, I do not believe that a pastor should ever preach with uncertainty. If he is uncertain then it would be better for him to keep his mouth shut. But given that I failed to keep my mouth shut, I am at least glad that I was honest about my uncertainty.

Emmaus was established in June of 2011. And as I started off in full time pastoral ministry I found that this topic of divorce and remarriage kept popping up. One situation after another would arise which had this issue of divorce and remarriage either at the center of it or in the background. Brothers and sisters, I do not like this subject, but I couldn’t get away from it. Those who know me best could tell you that over the years (and especially in the early years of Emmaus) I often had a book on the subject of divorce and remarriage out on my desk. I was constantly being driven back to this topic by the situations I was encountering as a pastor.

Thankfully, I began to have strong doubts concerning the permanence view of marriage early on in Emmaus’ history. But it did take me some time to fully shed that view and to develop firm convictions of my own concerning this difficult subject. I have been settled in my view for a few years now. I’ve had discussions with some of you about my view on the subject. The elders of Emmaus have also considered the issue and are of the same mind. And now the time has come for me to publicly repent of the erroneous views that I presented back in 2010 and to present teaching on this subject that is faithful to scripture.

Brothers and sisters, please forgive me for my careless handling of scriptures back in 2010 on this subject of divorce and remarriage. I know that it has caused some unnecessary angst for some of you, and I do seek your forgiveness.

The teaching that I present today and on the next Lord’s Day is the result of years of thought and study on this subject. I am happy to no longer feel uncertain about the teaching of scripture, but that does not mean that I no longer find the issue of divorce and remarriage very challenging. Understanding what the scriptures say on the subject is one thing. Applying the truth of scripture to the often complicated circumstances that arise within the lives of God’s people is another thing all together. This subject is a difficult one for pastors, and it always will be. We should proceed with great caution and with humility.

Todays sermon is on the subject of divorce. The sermon next Sunday will be on the subject of remarriage. These two sermons really need to be considered together.

I should also say that the elders have read Jim Newheiser’s book “Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage” and agree with his handling of this very difficult subject. I will only be able to say so much in these two sermons. If you have questions about divorce and remarriage that are not addressed in these two sermons I would urge you schedule a meeting with me and/or to grab a copy of Newheiser’s book. He does address a number of difficult questions, and he does so in a clear and concise manner.

So what does the Bible say about divorce?

*****

I. God’s Design For Marriage Is That It Last For Life

First of all, it must be stated that God’s design for marriage is that it last for life. There is a sense, therefore, in which me might say that God’s will for us is that we never divorce.

This point has already been established in this sermon series, but it needs to be restated here. Remember that we have defined marriage as “a lifelong covenant of companionship between a man and a woman that has been established under God and before the community.”

Understanding this basic principle – that God’s design for marriage is that it last for life – will help us to understand much of what the scriptures have to say on the subject of divorce and remarriage.

As a general rule, marriage is to last for life. As a general rule, it is “till death do us part”. This does not mean that there are no exceptions to this general rule (we will look at those exceptions momentarily), but the general rule must be established before the exceptions can be stated and understood. And so the scriptures time and time again establish the general rule that marriages are to last for life.

Remember the words of Christ in Matthew 19. When answering the question of the Pharisees, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause? He answered, ‘Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” (Matthew 19:4–6, ESV)

What is God’s ideal for marriage? That it last for life.

And take for example that famous text in Malachi 2:16 where we are told most bluntly that the “LORD God of Israel says that He hates divorce…” (Malachi 2:16, NKJV). Is it true that God hates divorce? Well, yes it is true, for the scriptures clearly say that he does. But we must pay careful attention to the context lest we misunderstand what is being said here.

In Malachi 2:13 we read, “And this is the second thing you do: You cover the altar of the LORD with tears, With weeping and crying; So He does not regard the offering anymore, Nor receive it with goodwill from your hands. Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’ Because the LORD has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant. But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth. For the LORD God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence, Says the LORD of hosts. Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.” (Malachi 2:13–16, NKJV)

Why does God hate divorce? Because it is a violation of his design for marriage – marriage being a life long covenant of companionship. Whenever there is divorce someone has violated the marriage covenant, either by committing the sin of adultery, or by divorcing without just cause. This is thing that God “hates”. This was the thing being addressed by Malachi the prophet – men were putting away their wives for no good reason. They were dealing “treacherously” with their wives, and as a result the alter of the LORD was being covered with tears – the tears of the wives and children presumably.

There are many passages in the holy scriptures which speak strongly against divorce and forcefully in favor of marriage lasting for life. Why? Because this is the ideal. This is God’s revealed will.

*****

II. Under Some Circumstances Divorce Is Permitted

Secondly, we must recognize that under some circumstances divorce is permitted.

This point should be considered in two parts. One, divorce as it was permitted for those under the Old Covenant. And two, divorce as it is permitted for those under the New Covenant.

First of all let us consider that divorce was permitted under the Old Covenant. In other words the people of Israel were permitted to divorce. The law of God given to them through Moses permitted divorce, and also regulated it.

It would be good for you to turn with me to Deuteronomy 24. There we read in verse 1, “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the LORD. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.” (Deuteronomy 24:1–4, ESV)

A few things should be noticed about this passage. One, divorce was by no means commanded or encouraged under Moses. Two, divorce (and remarriage) was permitted under Moses. And three, divorce (and remarriage) was regulated under Moses. In fact that is what this Deuteronomy passage is most about – the regulation of the existing practice of divorce. If a man was going to divorce his wife, or a wife her husband, a certificate of divorce would need to be given. What would the purpose of that certificate be except to show that the marriage had in fact been dissolved, that the man or woman was not longer obligated to fulfill martial duties, and that the divorced person was free to remarry. And what is expressly forbidden in this passage? Notice that the law of Moses did not forbid divorce (or even remarriage after divorce), but a woman returning to her first husband after the divorce once she had married another. That is thing forbidden under Moses – a divorce, and new marriage, and then a returning back to the first spouse if the second marriage ended in either divorce or in the death of the second spouse. What we see here in Deuteronomy 24 is the regulation of the practice of divorce.

We know that in the days of Jesus there were questions about valid grounds for divorce. There were some who held the position that a man was free to divorce his wife for just about any reason, and there were others who believed that valid reasons for divorce were much more limited in number. It was that debate concerning valid grounds for divorce that gave the Pharisees of Matthew 19 the opportunity to put Jesus to the test by asking “is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause? (Matthew 19:3, ESV)”. The Jews in Jesus’ day debated over the law on this point. They wondered, how are we to understand Deuteronomy 24 and the words, “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce… etc., etc.”(Deuteronomy 24:1, ESV). The Jews in Jesus’ day debated over what Moses meant when he said, “if then she finds no favor in his eyes”, and “because he has found some indecency in her.” What does that include? Can a man divorce his wife because she is a bad cook, for example? Or does the offence need to be more severe? What are the valid grounds for divorce according to the law? That was the question they debated over, and that was the question that they put to Jesus. Jesus, what is your understanding of the law of Moses on this point? They hoped to trip him up and entangle him in this messy debate.

Jesus’ answer surprised the Pharisees.

First of all, He refused to approach Deuteronomy 24 as if it answered their questions regarding divorce but went instead to Genesis 2:24-25. In other words the Pharisees were focused on Deuteronomy 24 thinking that that passage answered the question of valid grounds, but Jesus took them to another text – one that was earlier and more foundational. Jesus replied to the Pharisees saying, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:4–6, ESV). Jesus presented God’s ideal for marriage established at creation by quoting Genesis 2:24-25. Jesus, when is it appropriate for a man to divorce his wife?, the Pharisees asked. And what was Jesus’ answer? God’s ideal is that they remain together forever.

The Pharisees pressed him further saying, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” (Matthew 19:7, ESV). Clearly these man had Deuteronomy 24 in view. Their question is reasonable. It is as if they said, if it is true that marriage is to last for life then how are were to understand the words of Moses in Deuteronomy 24 which speak of divorce but do not forbid it outright?

Jesus’ answer: “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so” (Matthew 19:8, ESV).

This is a very important verse in helping us to understand divorce as it was under the Old Mosaic Covenant. Jesus’ interpretation of the law was that marriage was to last for life, that divorce was permitted (or tolerated) under Moses due to the hardness of the people’s hearts, and that it was regulated by Moses. In other words, the Pharisees were laboring to understand the grounds for divorce from Deuteronomy 24 and Jesus essentially said, you will not find them there. Deuteronomy 24 has to do with the regulation of the practice of divorce which was tolerated under Moses due to the hardness of the people’s hearts, but God’s ideal is that marriage last for life. “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate”

It should be remembered, brothers and sisters, that Old Covenant Israel was a mixed people. There were many – indeed, very many – within Israel who did not know the Lord. They were of Israel externally, but not inwardly. They were circumcised according to the flesh, but not of the heart. The law of Moses which was used to govern this mixed multitude included laws which regulated the practice of divorce, but did not forbid it altogether. This was due to the hardness of their hearts. Divorce was tolerated under the Old Covenant, but even then the ideal for the marriage relationship was that it be permanent.

One last thing that needs to be said before we move on to consider divorce under the New Covenant. We should not forget that under the Old Covenant the penalty for the sin of adultery was death. The adulterer and the adulteress were to be put to death under Moses. Leviticus 20:10 says, “If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall surely be put to death” (Leviticus 20:10, ESV). The sin of adultery is such a violation of God’s moral law and such a violation of the marriage covenant that under Moses the adulterer and the adulteress were to be put death. I was tempted here to go off on a tangent concerning the law of Moses and how we are to understand it now that we are under the New Covenant and in Christ, but that will have to wait for another time. For now, let this fact stand – under Moses the sin of adultery was to be punished by death.

Under the New Covenant two things happen that have a direct impact on this subject of divorce and remarriage.

First of all, with the transition from the Old Covenant to the New we find that civil laws that governed Israel no longer govern God’s people. To put it differently, under the Old Covenant church and state were united as one, but under the New Covenant church and state are distinct. No longer does God have a particular nation that is his own, but is calling his elect from all the peoples of the earth. His kingdom is expanding to the ends of the earth through the proclamation of the gospel. This is not accomplished through military conquest, but by the word and Spirit. The expansion of Christ’s kingdom has nothing to do with boarders, but souls rescued from the kingdom of darkness and transferred into the kingdom of light. And under the New Covenant God’s people (the church) do not wield the sword – the state does. It is not the churches job to enforce civil law. It is not the churches job to try criminals and to punish. The state has the responsibility to do so, but not the church. Under the New Covenant God’s kingdom is not of this world. The weapons of his kingdom are not sword and spear, but word and Spirit.

How does all of this apply to the subject of divorce (and remarriage)? Well, it is very important to recognize that the sin of adultery, which under the Old Covenant was punishable by death, is no longer punishable by death under the New.

Let me put the matter this way. If under the Old Covenant the subject of divorce (and remarriage) was being discussed the question of the sin of adultery being a valid grounds for divorce and remarriage would not have arisen, for the penalty for adultery was death. But under the New Covenant this question does arise, for the New Covenant people of God are not governed by the civil laws of Old Covenant Israel. The Israel of God (the church) under the New Covenant is governed by the civil laws of the nations where God has placed them providentially. You have probably noticed that the civil laws under which we live do not have death as the penalty for adultery. In fact, in most States there is no penalty at all for the sin of adultery (I believe it is true that there are 20 States in our Union in which adultery is still a crime, but it is very rare for there to be any prosecutions).

So under the New Covenant this question must be addressed. Is the sin of adultery a valid ground for divorce for the Christian? And the answer is yes.

Jesus says so most directly in the Matthew 19 passage that we have been considering. Verse 9: “And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery” (Matthew 19:9, ESV).

Ordinarily, marriage is to last for life. To divorce and remarry is to commit adultery. The one exception given by Christ is in the case of the sin of adultery, or sexual immorality, committed by ones spouse. The sin of adultery so violates the marriage covenant that divorce (and as we will see, remarriage) is permitted.

There is one other situation in which a Christian is free to divorce (and as we will see, remarry), and that is in the case of abandonment by a non-believing spouse.

Listen to Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 7 and starting in verse 8: “To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord [this means that this is something that Christ addressed in his ministry]): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife [this is the general rule – divorce is not an option for the believer, with the one stated exception being the sin of adultery]. To the rest I say (I, not the Lord [in other words, Jesus did not address this directly, but Paul is addressing it here) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?” (1 Corinthians 7:8–16, ESV)

Paul’s teaching agrees with Jesus’, as you would expect it to. But Paul is here applying the teaching of Christ to the difficult circumstances that arrise within the church. What does he add? Ordinarily, marriage is for life. If a believing husband and wife do separate they should not remarry but work towards reconciliation. And if a Christian is abandoned by his or her unbelieving spouse, “let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved.” I take this to mean that the brother our sister does not sin by going through with the divorce. It probably also means that the abandoned Christian is also free to remarry, though I would urge the Christian to proceed with caution here. It is likely that the non-believer who has abandoned the Christian will remarry. By remarrying he or she will commit adultery, leaving the abandoned spouse free to remarry, with no doubt.

*****

Conclusion

Brothers and sisters, this is such a complicated subject. I’ll admit that it is difficult to understand the teaching of scripture concerning divorce and remarriage. I struggled to understand it, as I said. But this subject is made exceedingly complicated by the difficult situations that people (even Christians) get themselves into because of their sin. In this sermon I have only presented the basic teaching of scripture concerning divorce. I understand that I have left many questions unanswered. You can probably think of dozens of hypothetical situations and ask, “what if…?” Please bring those questions to me so that we can work through them together.

Let me close by making a few points of application.

First of all, it must be said that although divorce without Biblical grounds is a sin, it is not an unforgivable sin. To the one who has sinfully divorced in the past I would say, acknowledge your sin, turn from it, do everything in your power to undo the dammage that has been done (which might involve reconciling with your previous spouse provided that neither of you have remarried) and look to Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Christ is able to cleanse you and to restore you. Run to him.

Secondly (and this point is going to sound very strange to you at first), it must me recognized that divorce is, under some circumstances, and in a certain sense, good. True, God hates divorce. True, divorce is always the result of some sin. True, divorce will always be accompanied by a great deal of sorrow. But with that said, there is a sense in which it is good. It is good in that it protects the innocent spose from being joined for life to a spouse that is unfaithful. Here is that way that Jay Adams put it: “Even though all divorces are the result of sin, not all divorces are sinful” (Adams, Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage in the Bible, 30). To put it more directly, if you have divorced with Biblical grounds – due to adultery or abandonment – you need not feel the least bit guilty about that. You will likely feel grief and sorrow over the divorce, but you need not feel guilt.

Thirdly, it should be recognized that although divorce is permitted the case of adultery it is not required. A husband or wife who has been sinned against in this way may choose to remain in the marriage. Of course this would require repentance from the adulterer. This would require forgiveness from the one sinned against. And this would require a great deal of effort as the husband and wife would need to work to restore the marriage and to rebuild trust. Though this road may be difficult, it is not impossible, especially with Christ at work within the midst of it.

Consider this. A Christian must forgive those who have sinned against them from the heart even if there is no repentance. If there is repentance, that forgiveness must be transacted – forgiveness must be extended. Extending forgiveness does not mean that everything goes back to how it used to be. In other words, a Christian is not obligated to take his or her adulterous spouse back just because they say the words “I’m sorry, please forgive me” – adultery is a valid grounds for divorce. But if the repentance is true the Christian spouse does have an opportunity to extend a grace to the one who has sinned and to keep the marriage in tact. In my opinion, this would be a very beautiful reflection of the love of Christ for his church. We have been so terribly unfaithful to our God, and yet takes us back time and time again in Christ Jesus.

I will say one more thing about keeping a marriage intact after the sin of adultery. If a husband or wife chooses that rout (to continue on with the marriage despite the sin of unfaithfulness), then the threat of divorce needs to be set aside after that decision is made. Do you have grounds for divorce if your spouse has been unfaithful? Yes you do. Must you divorce? No, you may remain in the marriage if your spouse is repentant. But if you choose to stay married the sin of adultery needs to be forgiven and not held against your spouse any longer. In other words, at some point (and I’m not sure how long this will take) the one has been sinned against needs to say, “I forgive you, I’m staying, I no longer have grounds for divorce. Till death do us part.” It should not be difficult to understand why this would be important.

Fourthly, if you are a Christian and a member of a church that takes the responsibility of exercising biblical church discipline seriously (every Christian should be), the church must be involved in the process of determining whether divorce is permissible. I feel for the Christian who attends a church without membership and without discipline when deep troubles within the marriage arise leading to divorce. Marriage is instituted publicly and before witness. The decision to divorce should also involve witnesses. If a Christian man or woman has committed adultery the church must be involved. If a Christian man or woman abandons his or her spouse the church must be involved. If a Christian is considering or going through a divorce the church must be involved to either oppose or support the decision.

Fifthly, let us do everything in our power to protect our marriages, brothers and sisters.

Posted in Sermons Joe Anady Genesis 2:24-25; Matthew 19:1-9
Comments Off on Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Divorce Posted by Joe

Dec
2

Sermon: Genesis 2.24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Communication

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24–25

New Testament Reading: James 3:1–4:3

“Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body. If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so. Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water. Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice. But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace. What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” (James 3:1–4:3, ESV)

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Introduction

This is now the seventh sermon in this series within a series on the subject of marriage, divorce and remarriage. So far we have only addressed the subject of marriage, and the same will be true of the sermon today. Teaching concerning the difficult but important subject of divorce and remarriage will be presented in the weeks to come, Lord willing. Today we are once again asking the question, how can we build marriage relationships that are healthy and God honoring?

My original intention for this sermon was to address common problems that arise within marriages. Couples often struggle to show love, to resolve conflicts, and to develop physical and emotional intimacy. It is common for conflicts to arise over issues such as parenting, time management, and finances. Indeed, if we were to make a list of the problems prevalent within marriages the list would be quite long. But instead of saying a little about a lot of common problems I have decided to say a lot about one issue in particular, and that is the issue of communication.

I have three reasons for focusing in upon the issue of communication.

One, in my experience this is the thing that couples struggle with the most in marriage. Husbands and wives often struggle to communicate. Their communication may be either nonexistent, superficial, or hostile.

Two, if my reasoning is sound, improving communication will also bring improvements to the other issues that husbands and wives face. I think you would agree that husbands and wives can work through many things, even very difficult things, if they only had the ability to speak the truth to one another in love.

Three, communication is the lifeblood of every relationship. The health of your relationship is directly tied to the health of your communication.

You cannot say that you have a relationship with someone if you have never spoken with them. If someone asks you, “do you know so and so…” you cannot answer in the affirmative unless you have at some point and in some way communicated with that person. If you have never communicated with them you may say, “I know of her”, but you can say I “know her…” But if there was communication in the past, even if it was only a brief exchange, then you may say, “I know her”. Communication is the thing that establishes a relationship. You pass by people every day. You make eye contact with some of them. But you do not have a relationship with any of them, unless you talk. And the more frequent and substantial the communication, the deeper the relationship. You may rightly say that you know a person that you met only once years ago, but you cannot say that you know them well. How do you come to know someone well? It is by frequent and substantial communication. This is true of your relationship with God. A person’s relationship with God may be called “strong” when that person knows God’s word, walks according to it, and lives in constant and prayerful dependence upon him. It is also true of our relationships with one another, and especially husbands and wives. The health a marriage relationship is directly tied to the health of the couples communication. Communication is the lifeblood of every relationship.

I have five points to make that I hope will help us to improve in our communication with one another, particularly within the marriage relationship.

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I. Husbands and Wives Must Resolve to Communicate Well with One Another

First of all, husbands and wives must resolve to communicate well with one another.

A couple of things are implied in this point.

First of all, it is implied that good communication requires effort.

Why is it so difficult for us to communicate well? Why does good communication require so much effort? The answer is that we are fallen. Communication is difficult for us because of the sins, weakness and immaturities that are in our hearts.

Stringing together a series of words in a coherent fashion is not difficult for most people. This we learned to do at a very young age. Communication becomes difficult when there is some sin or weakness in the heart of the one speaking or in the heart of the one listening.

Things like pride and fear make good communication difficult. A judgemental or harsh spirit is a hindrance to good communication. The same may be said of the one who is defensiveness or overly sensitive. These sins and weakness are barriers to healthy communication.

It seems to me that this point is illustrated in the narrative of Genesis chapters 2 and 3. We have read this text many times now, and so it should be familiar to you. In that passage where the institution of marriage is first mentioned we read, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed” (Genesis 2:24–25, ESV). Adam and Eve were created to enjoy intimacy in the marriage relationship. They were joined together by God in a covenant of companionship. And we know that they did in fact enjoy this intimacy – that they were in fact close companions – for we are told that “the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.”

What is meant by this? Well, first of all it simply means that they were physically naked and felt no shame about that. But the narrative of Genesis 3 will make it clear that their physical nakedness and lack of shame corresponded to their spiritual, emotional and relational nakedness and lack of shame. Adam and Eve stood before one another completely naked and exposed in every way as husband and wife, and they felt no shame. They knew one another truly and thoroughly. They did not hide anything from one another for there was nothing to hide. Before sin entered into the world there was no shame. This was true for Adam and Eve in regard to their relationship before God, and this was true of to their relationship with one another.

But as we will see all of this changed when the couple fell into sin. In Genesis 3:7 we read, “Then [that is, after the ate of the forbidden fruit] the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths” (Genesis 3:7, ESV). The couple then hid from God. And what happened to the blissfulness of their one flesh union? Their perfect and shameless companionship was corrupted and marred by conflict.

God confronted Adam concerning his sin, and what did Adam say? He shifted the blame, saying, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate” (Genesis 3:12, ESV). And do you remember the curse pronounced upon the woman? “To the woman [God] said, ‘I will greatly increase your labor pains; with pain you will give birth to children. You will want to control your husband, but he will dominate you’” (Genesis 3:16, NET).

What am I saying? Well, simply this: do not be surprised that good communication will require effort this side of the fall and this side of the new heavens and new earth. I trust that you are able to string words together in a coherent fashion – that is not the problem. The problem is the sin that resides within our hearts. We can harsh, judgmental, defensive, uncaring, disengaged in our communication, and this is due to our sin.

The secondly thing implied by this first point, husbands and wives must resolve to communicate well with one another, is that many are in fact complacent in the their poor communication.

You and I have developed communication habits, I’m sure of it. And I am also confident that some of those habits are bad habits. Some have the habit of not really listening. Others have the habit of speaking harshly. And others have the habit of shutting down when the conversation goes in a direction they are not pleased with. I could go on and on with a list of bad communication habits.

At some point we simply have to decide that we are going to make good and Godly communication a priority. At some point we must say, God and Christ are Lord, not only over that which I think and do, but also over my speaking and even my listening. Tell me, friend, do you speak to the glory of God? And do you listen to others to the glory of his name?

I will not develop this thought too much for the sake of time, but I am convinced that one of the ways that we can glorify God the most is through our communication. God is a communicating God. One of the things that it means for us to be made in his image is that we are able to communicate with him. And one of the things that it means for us to be a part of the human species is that we are able to communicate with one another. Eve was made to correspond to Adam. The two could, among other things, communicate with one another and together they could commune with God. Marriage was instituted to serve as a picture of God’s covenantal relationship to his people. Marriage is in fact an analogy of Christ’s relationship to the church. If the relationship between husband and wife is to function as a picture of the relationship between God and his people, then we had better pursue intimacy in our communication, for God has communicated to us through his Son and has reconciled us to himself through our union with him. Let us resolve to glorify God, not only in our thoughts and actions, but also in our communication. Let us speak and listen in a way that gives glory to God.

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II. Husbands and Wives Must Communicate in Love

This brings us to the second point in this sermon which is, husbands and wives must communicate in love.

Let us communicate being driven by our love for God and our love for one another.

I would assume that many when they hear the exhortation to speak the truth in love, they assume it means to speak in a gentle and loving tone. And while it is true that our tone should usually be gentle and loving, I can actually think of instances where it is good and right and, dare I say, most loving to speak in a firm and confrontational tone. Did not our Savior do this? Did not the prophets do this? Did Christ and the prophets sin when they spoke firmly with the rebellious of their day? No! For though their tone might have been harsh, their words were spoken in love. They said what they said in the way that they said it out of a true love for God and out of a true love for their neighbor. Now, I would imagine that it would be on very rare occasions that a husbands and wives would need to be so firm and dirrectr with one another. But the point I am making is this: to “communicate in love” is to communicate being driven and governed by a sincere love for God and a sincere love for the one you are communicating with.

What is motivating your communication? When you listen and speak to your spouse or children (or anyone for that matter), what is driving you? What principle is governing you?

Two things should be driving and governing all of our communication. First of all, love for God. And secondly, love for one another.

I will ask the question again, are you seeking the glory and honor of God in your listening and in your speaking? Are you mindful of this question as you communicate with others: is God pleased with the way that I am listening and speaking?

And secondly, are you seeking the good of your neighbor (your spouse) in your communication? Is your communication with others driven and governed by love?

I am convinced that most of our failures in communication can be traced back to a failure to love the one we are communicating with. Instead of loving and serving the other with our ears and mouth, we love and serve ourselves.

There have been times where as a father I have spoken too harshly to my children. I’ve grown impatient with them and have barked at them. And when I have analyzed those instances of sinful communication I have often come to the conclusion that I was simply being lazy as a father. Instead of being driven by my love for God and love for my children I was driven by love for self. Instead of asking the question, what do my children truly need right now? I asked the question (though I didn’t realize it at the time), what will be easiest for me? What did my children really need? What would have been most beneficial them? They probably needed their father to intervene in the situation (whatever it was) in a calm manner. They needed their father to listen so as to truly understand the situation (whatever it was). And they probably needed their father to offer advice and maybe even discipline so that the problem might be truly resolved and so that the sin (whatever it was) might truly be addressed and repented of. That is what my children really needed. But that would have required a lot of time and effort, and I was tired, and so I carelessly communicated. Instead of listening and seeking to understand before speaking (maybe even firmly), I just yelled at them. Instead of being driven and governed by a true love for God and a true love for my children, I was driven by love for self.

And what can I say about arguments that I have had with my wife? The same principle applies. If my communication with her was always driven and governed by my love for God and my love for her then I dont think we would ever fight. We might have differences of opinion, but those differences of opinion would never turn into arguments or fights if we were being driven and governed by love as we communicate with one another.

I don’t think Lindsay and I are unique in this. There have been times where after having an argument we look back upon the argument and have a hard time remembering what the argument was about. Maybe it was a difference of opinion about money or what color to paint the walls or where to go for dinner, but the argument became an argument, not because of money or paint or a restaurant, but because of a failure to love. At some point someone started to be selfish. Someone started to be driven by pride. Someone decided that they would have to have it their way. And that is what caused the fight, not the difference of opinion.

James 4:1 poses the question, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you?” Listen carefully to the answer that James gives. “Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask. You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.” (James 4:1–3, ESV) It is selfishness or the sin of covetousness in the heart which causes quarrels and fights.

Brothers and sisters, our communication with one another must flow, not from selfish hearts, but from selfless and loving hearts. We should look into the eyes of the one we are communicating with and think, I am going to interact with this one in a way that is pleasing to God and in a way that will be for their good

Ephesians 4:15 says, “Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love” (Ephesians 4:15–16, ESV). This should be our goal in communication – to build one another up.

Spouses have been exhorted in this sermon series to love one another, that is, to live for the good of the other. What I am proposing to you now is that the greatest opportunity we have to love one another is through our communication. We love one another when we listen and seek to truly understand one another. Brothers and sisters, there is so much power in our words. Our words have the power to either build up or tear down. Husbands and wives must communicate in love.

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III. Husbands and Wives Must Learn to Listen Well

Thirdly, husbands and wives must learn to listen well.

When I say “communication” I would imagine the very first thing that comes to mind is talking. But really the beginning of good communication involves listening. And by listening I do not mean allowing the other person to make noise with their mouth so that your ear drums vibrate, but actually laboring to understand the other persons point of view before responding. Your first objective in communication should be to hear the other person so as to understand them. Most of our bad communication begins with poor listening.

This is why James says, “let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger…” (James 1:19, ESV). What is the thing that we should do first when communicating? We should listen! This is the thing that we should be eager to do – listen. We should labor to truly understand the perspective of the other person. And what is the thing that we should be willing to delay? Our speaking.

Proverbs 18:12 says, “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.”

Proverbs 29:20 says, “Do you see a man who is hasty in his words? There is more hope for a fool than for him.”

If we hope to have good communication we must learn listen well.

Here are a few things that you can do to become a good listener.

The first step is to actually want to understand the other persons perspective. Often times we do not make it past this step, but have winning the argument as a highest goal.

Secondly, be sure that you are giving full attention to the one who is speaking to you.

Thirdly, during especially important or sensitive conversations repeat back to the person what it is that you heard them say. You may say something like, “if I undestand you correctly this is what you are saying…”

Fourthly, it is also helpful to ask clarifying questions, saying, “is this what you meant when you said such and such?” We should be ever aware of the fact that we are prone to misunderstand what others are saying. Sometimes we take what they are saying in a way different from how they intended it. Sometimes we read in to what they are saying. Sometimes are defensive and overly sensitive. If our goal is to truly understand the other person then we will take the time to ask clarifying questions.

As I said before, the trouble is that our goal is often not to hear so as to understand the other, but to get our own way. Instead of listening carefully, repeating what we have heard and asking clarifying questions, we pick apart the words of the other, capitalize on every misstep and assume the worst so that we might have ammunition to use against the other to win the argument.

Brothers and sisters, “do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others…” (Philippians 2:3–5, ESV)

Let us love one another by truly listening to one another.

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IV. Husbands and Wives Must Learn to Speak Well

Fourthly, husbands and wives must learn to speak well.

Husbands and wives would be wise to say the right thing to one another at the right time and in the right way.

Husbands and wives should always say the right thing. We should always speak the truth to one another. Never should we lie. And sometimes husbands and wives will need to say difficult things to one another. If there is some weakness or sin that you see in your spouse, it should not be ignored.

Some, I have found, are prone to avoid difficult conversations at all costs. This mighty seem easier in the short term, but things will be more difficult in the long run.

Others are hasty and careless in their confrontation. They see a problem and address it immediately and often in a harsh manner.

We should be truthful with one another, but timing and tone matters.

Husband, if there is something you need to address with your wife be careful when you choose to do it. Do not address it when the two of you are tired, or in the middle of and already heated argument, or when the kids are around.

Wives, if there is something you need to address with your husband be careful when you choose to do it. Perhaps not the moment he walks in the door from a long and stressful day work.

Tone also matters. Confrontation does not have to involve conflict. We should be able to speak calmly to one another about difficult matters. We should be aware of our tone and also our body language when we communicate.

The goal should be to say what needs to be said at a time and in a way that gives the others person the greatest opportunity to listen well to what is being said.

Brothers and sisters, say the right thing, at the right time, in the right way.

Colossians 4:6: “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person”.

Proverbs 15:4: “A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit”.

Proverbs 15:23: “To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it is!”

I understand that some people (men in particular) struggle with communication in that they do not talk enough. Men, we need to talk. And we should be willing to talk with our wives about things that are deep and substantial.

But many more struggle with communication because their words are too numerous. Proverbs 10:19 says, “When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but whoever restrains his lips is prudent.”

Brothers and sisters, “let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear” (Ephesians 4:29, ESV).

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V. Husbands and Wives Must Communicate with Hearts Prepared and Pure

Fifthly, and lastly, husbands and wives must communicate with hearts prepared and pure.

It is so very important for you to understand this principle: the words that come out of your mouth come from your heart.

Listen to the words of Christ beginning in Luke 6:43: “For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, for each tree is known by its own fruit. For figs are not gathered from thornbushes, nor are grapes picked from a bramble bush. The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks” (Luke 6:43–45, ESV).

Are you struggling to controle your words? Then check your heart!

The same principle is communicated in the James 3 passage that was read at the beginning of this sermon.

James draws attention to the power that it is in the tongue. Though a very small part of our body, the tongue has great power. Like a bit that controls the direction of a powerful horse, like the the small rudder which steers a great ship, and like a small spark which sets a forrest ablaze, so the tongue, though very small has the power to do great harm or great good. The way we use our tongue in many ways determines the course of our life.

James also points out that tongue is the hardest thing of all to control. He says, “Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness. For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body” (James 3:1–2, ESV). And again in verse 7, “For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison. With our tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so” (James 3:7–10, ESV).

And why is it that we have such a hard time controlling the tongue? How can it be that we spew forth such evil and poison with our words? How can in be that in one moment we use or tongue to bless God and the next we use the same tongue to curse men made in the image of God? James agrees with Jesus. It is the heart that is the problem. “Does a spring pour forth from the same opening both fresh and salt water? Can a fig tree, my brothers, bear olives, or a grapevine produce figs? Neither can a salt pond yield fresh water. Who is wise and understanding among you? By his good conduct let him show his works in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic. For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice” (James 3:11–16, ESV).

A fresh water spring will produce fresh water, fig tree will produce figs, and a heart that is pure and well prepared will manifest itself in purity of speech, “for out of the abundance of the heart [the] mouth speaks” (Luke 6:45, ESV).

Prepare your hearts, brothers and sisters. Do this daily. But especially do it prior to confronting someone concerning sin. “First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” (Matthew 7:5, ESV)

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Conclusion

Dear friends, let us resolve to communicate well with one another.

Let our communication be driven and governed by our love for God and for one another.

Let us learn to listen well.

And let us learn to speak well.

Above all let us live with hearts that are pure and well prepared, “for out of the abundance of the heart [the] mouth speaks”.

The health of our marriages depend largely upon the health of our communication.

If we hope to have healthy and God honoring marriages we must learn to love one another ion our listening and in our speech.

Posted in Sermons Joe Anady Genesis 2:24-25
Comments Off on Sermon: Genesis 2.24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: Communication Posted by Joe

Nov
25

Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Wife

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24–25

New Testament Reading: 1 Peter 3:1-7

“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.” (1 Peter 3:1–7, ESV)

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Introduction

In this sermon we are again asking the question, how can we have successful and God honoring marriages? In the previous sermon all of the focus was on the role of the husband. Husbands are to lovingly lead their wives. A husbands love for his wife is to be like Christ’s love for the church. His love is to be unconditional, sacrificial, purifying, selfless, affectionate, understanding, and affirming. Christ loves the church with this kind of love. Husbands are to love their wives in imitation of their Savior. Today our attention turns to the wives.

Before we go there I should say that although only a portion of the congregation is being directly addressed in this sermon and in the previous one, all should be able to apply the principles that have been and will be communicated. I think you are doing this naturally. Someone did approach me after the sermon last week and said, “though I am not married, I had my relationship with my mother in mind the entire time. I need to love her with an unconditional, sacrificial, purifying, selfless, affectionate, understanding, and affirming love”. These principles, though they are being delivered to husbands in regard to their relationship with their wives, and to wives in regard to their relationship with their husbands, are truly applicable to all. For example, parents should love their children with an unconditional, sacrificial, purifying, selfless, affectionate, understanding, and affirming love. Christians should love their brothers and sisters in Christ with an unconditional, sacrificial, purifying, selfless, affectionate, understanding, and affirming love. Certainly the love that a husband is to have for his wife is special and, in some respects, unique. But love is love. All Christians are to love others with the love of Christ.

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I. Wives are to submit to their own husbands as to the Lord.

We know that husbands are called by God to lovingly lead their wives as Christ has loved the church. But what is the role that wives are to take in the marriage relationship? The answer is that wives are to submit to their own husbands as to the Lord.

This principle is clearly communicated in 1 Peter 3:1-7. There we find the words, “Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives” (1 Peter 3:1, ESV). Wives, we are told, are to “be subject” to their own husbands. And in verse 5 of the same passage we read, “For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening” (1 Peter 3:5–6, ESV). Wives are to “submit to their own husbands”, we are told.

The Greek word translated as “be subject” in 1 Peter 3:1 is ὑποτάσσομαι and it has this basic meaning: “to submit to the orders or directives of someone—‘to obey, to submit’”. And it is the same Greek word that is behind the phrase, “by submitting” in verse 5 – “For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands.” Also, notice that Sarah is put forth as an example of one of those “holy women” who adorned themselves with a “gentle and quiet spirit”. Sarah, we are told, “hoped in God” and therefore “did not fear anything that is frightening” when she “obeyed Abraham, calling him lord”. What does it mean, therefore, for a wife to “be subject” to her husband and “to submit” to him? It means that she is to honor and respect him as her head or “lord” and is to obey him in all things.

I’ve put the matter rather bluntly for a reason. Of course, more needs to be said about a wife’s submission. This call for a wife’s submission does need to be qualified. It is true, for example, that a husband should honor his wife and cherish her opinion while making decisions so that, in most instances, decisions are made together. And indeed, there are limitations to a wife’s submission. More needs to be said about this issue, and more will be said. But I am afraid that in our culture we are too quick to dismiss the clear and plain teaching of scripture on this subject. We are tempted to avoid it or to brush it to the side. We are quick to go immediately to the task of limiting or qualifying the call for a wife’s submission. We are quick to say, “Ya, well certainly the scriptures do not mean this or that when they say to the wife, ‘be subject’…” Or sometimes we run immediately to those hypotheticals, saying, “but what about when… is a wife still called to submit when…” What I am saying is that while these is certainly more that needs to be said concerning the submission of a wife to her husband, it is important that we first allow the clear and unambiguous teaching of scripture to stand. What role is the wife called to take in the marriage relationship? She is to be subject to her husband, submitting to him in all things.

1 Peter 3 is not the only place where this teaching appears. Paul addresses husbands and wives in Colossians 3:18 where he says, “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them” (Colossians 3:18–19, ESV). Here in this text the role of husband and wife is stated most succinctly. It is fitting, or right and proper, that a husband love his wife and that a wife submit to her husband.

We find similar words in Ephesians 5 in that passage that we considered last week. In verses 22 we read, “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands” (Ephesians 5:22–24, ESV). Notice that in this text Paul says that wives are to submit to their husbands “as to the Lord”. And again in verse 24, “Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands”. The wife is to submit to her husband in the same way that the church is to submit to Christ – in all things. This does not mean that a husband should micromanage his wife, but it does mean that he is to be honored as the head in all things, for he is the one who is responsible before God for his wife and family in all things.

Before we go any further it is important to recognize that “submission” does not mean “less significant” or “of lesser worth”. We see this principle on display throughout society. Children are to submit to their parents showing honor to them by virtue of their position of authority, but they are not less significant or of lesser worth. Citizens are to submit to those who govern showing honor to them by virtue of their position of authority, but they are not less significant or of lesser worth. When a wife is called by God to submit to her husbands it is not because she is less significant, of lesser worth, or of lesser ability. It is because of the order that God established at the beginning within the marriage relationship.

We even see this principle of submission on display in what the scriptures reveal to us concerning the Triune God. The scriptures reveal that in order to accomplish our salvation the Son of God submits to the Father, and the Spirit of God submits to the Father and the Son. This is significant. Within the Triune God we find the principle of subordination on display. Clearly, “submission” does not mean “less significant” or of “lesser worth”, for Father, Son and Holy Spirit are “the same in essence, equal in power and glory” (BC, Question 9).

Consider 1 Corinthians 11:3 which says, “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God” (1 Corinthians 11:3, ESV). Even Christ lives under the authority of another, namely God. And every husband lives under the authority of another, namely God and Christ. And every wife lives under the authority of another, namely God and Christ and her husband. When a wife submits to her husband, she ultimately is found living in submission to the Lord as she lives in obedience to him, and in reliance upon him.

What does it look like for a wife to submit to her husband?

A wife submits to her husband she looks to him as her head, allows him to lead in every area of life, seeks to help him fulfill his calling, and shows him honor and respect within the home and within the community.

As I have said before, this does not mean that a husband should micromanage his wife. Nor does this mean that the wife should have no say in family decisions. Ideally, a husband will trust his wife and will give her great freedom to use her God-given abilities to manage her responsibilities wisely (Newheiser, Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage, 97).

I do wonder what kind of wife people envision when they hear teaching like this on submission. Do they envision a woman who is weak, incapable and oppressed? Do they envision a woman who is controlled by her husband, free only to follow his every command? I certainly hope not! In fact we should expect that a godly woman who submits to her husband in all things will be strong, capable, wise and highly esteemed by her husband. We should expect that a submissive wife will have great freedom do choose and to do as she sees fit. It is possible, and may I add preferable, that as a wife learns to truly honor her husband as head, the husbands will grow in his esteem for her and will gladly give her freedom to run as she fulfills God’s calling for her life.

This is terrible what I am about to do. Rarely do I use illustrations, and I am about to use a football illustration in a sermon directed towards wives (even that sounded rather sexist, didn’t it?). Tell me, who is more valuable to a football team, the quarterback or the coach? It’s hard to say, isn’t it? Who has more freedom?nWell, they both have freedom don’t they, but of a different kind. And who is more impactful to the outcome of a game? Also, hard to say? But when I ask, who is to submit to who? the answer should be clear. The quarterback is ultimately to submit to the will of the coach.

When I think of a wife properly submitting to her husband I do not think of the kind of submission that a small child is to have before his parents, but instead the the kind of submission that a pro bowl quarterback should have before his coach, or a gifted manager before the owner of the company.

Before we move on I would like to read you that famous description of an excellent wife found in Proverbs 31. And as I read this description of an excellent wife ask yourself, does this sound like a woman who is weak, incapable and oppressed by a controlling by her husband, or one who is trusted, highly esteemed, and free?

“An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong. She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night. She puts her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle. She opens her hand to the poor and reaches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household are clothed in scarlet. She makes bed coverings for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sits among the elders of the land. She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant. Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: ‘Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.’ Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates” (Proverbs 31:10–31, ESV).

Wives are to submit to their own husbands as to the Lord. This they are to do in all things. This they are to do, not on the basis of their husbands worthiness, but in obedience to the command of God.

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II. Wives are to take the position of helper.

Secondly, notice that the woman was created by God in the beginning to take the position of a helper. Therefore, the command for wives to be subject to their husbands is rooted, not in culture, but in creation. I will keep this point brief given that I expanded upon a similar point regarding the headship of the husband in last weeks sermon. When Paul says, wives “submit to your husbands as to the Lord”, he is not saying “this is how we do things in our culture”, this is how God designed the marriage relationship to function from the beginning.

In the creation narrative we learn that Adam was formed first, and then Eve. And when the time came for the creation of Eve God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him” (Genesis 2:18, ESV). Eve was created to be Adam’s helper. Wives are to come alongside their husbands as helpers.

A wise and godly wife will recognize that an important part of her responsibility is to come alongside her husband to help him to thrive in whatever it is that the Lord has called him too.

Listen to Newheiser. He says, “this can be done through wise counsel and encouragement. She will work hard to make their home a place of joy and refuge for him, too (Titus 2:5). A wife has a very powerful influence over her husband, which can be used either for good or for evil. Few men can refuse to do what their wives want, even when they are wrong (see Gen. 3:6; 16:2). Conversely, a wife’s respect and affirmation are a powerful motivator. A godly wife ‘does him good and not evil all the days of her life’ (Prov. 31:12). Proverbs 31 implies that the husband of this excellent wife is successful, has an excellent reputation, and sits with the elders of the city because of the kind of wife God has given him (v. 23).”

Wives are to take the position of helper.

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III. Wives should submit to their husbands even when it is difficult.

Thirdly, it must be said that wives should submit to their husbands even when it is difficult.

Our sin makes a mess of everything, doesn’t it? Why is this teaching about headship and submission within marriage so difficult for us to swallow? Is it not because of sin? I think most would agree that if we imagine Adam and Eve living in paradise before sin entered the world this teaching about headship and submission does not seem difficult, but is in fact quite beautiful. Imaging Adam in his upright state perfectly loving and leading Eve as her head. And imagine Eve in her upright state perfectly submitting to Adam as his helper.

I hope that you would agree that this order of male headship and female submission is not in and of itself difficult or distasteful. It is difficult, and some even find it distasteful because of our sin. Truth be told, some wives make it very difficult for their husbands to lovingly lead because of their sin. And some husbands make it very difficult for their wives to lovingly submit because of their sin. Furthermore, some men have a very difficult time leading in a loving way because of the sin that is in their own heart. And some women have a very difficult time submitting to their husbands in love because of the sin in their own hearts. Put more simply, the order of male headship female submission would not be difficult for us or seem distasteful to us were it not for sin. If we were not in sin we would not gripe at the suggestion that husbands and wives should both lay down their lives and live for the good of one another.

In Genesis 3 we are told of Adam’s fall into sin. And there in that same passage we also hear God’s curse pronounced upon the servant, the woman and finally the man. Of particular importance to our topic today is the curse that God pronounced upon the woman. “To the woman he said, ‘I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you (Genesis 3:16, ESV).”

I grew up reading the NKJV. Here is how it translates the second half of Geneses 3:16: “Your desire shall be for your husband, And he shall rule over you” (Genesis 3:16, NKJV). The question we are left with is what does it mean for a wive’s desire to be “for” her husband. And what does it mean that the husband will “rule over” his wife.

We should remember that these words are words of judgment. God is saying, this is how things will be because you have chosen to rebel against my word and to go your own way. Whatever is communicated here, it is not good, but is a distortion of God’s original design for the marriage relationship. Put differently, it is only because our sin ands rebellion that a wife now has a “desire for” her husband, and that the husband will “rule over” his wife.

I think the ESV’s translation of Genesis 3:16 is good when it says, “your desire shall be contrary to your husband, but he shall rule over you.” I think the NET’s translation is even better when it says, “You will want to control your husband, but he will dominate you” (Genesis 3:16, NET). That, I think, is the sense of the verse. According to God’s design the husband is to lovingly lead his wife, and the wife is to lovingly submit to her husband. But here is the natural order of things now that we have fallen into sin: the wife will wrongly seek to control her husband, and the husband will wrongly attempt to dominate his wife.

Sin – the first sin of Adam, and our personal sin – messes everything up. It is now very hard for a man to lovingly lead, and it is also very hard for a wife to submit. But in Christ it is possible. That which was lost in the fall of the first Adam is restored by the finished work of the second Adam, Christ Jesus our Lord. We have been renewed in him. Our guilt has been taken away, and the power of sin has been broken. God is now at work in us to sanctify us by his word and Spirit. And I am convinced that God uses the marriage relationship to sanctify his people profoundly. It is in marriage that a man and woman learn to love one another selflessly with the love of Christ.

What should a Christian wife do if she is married to a man who makes submission very hard? The answer is that she should do her part. Wives should submit to their husbands even when it is difficult. Her impulse will be to control her husband, to manipulate his behavior, to self-protect. But this is not God’s will for her. A wife should lovingly submit to her husband even when it is hard. She should be like Sarah who trusted in God and did not fear anything that it frightening when she submitted to Abraham, calling him lord, despite his significant weaknesses and shortcomings.

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IV. There are limitations to a wife’s submission.

Fourth, it must be said that there are limitations to a wife’s submission.

If a husband asks the wife to do or say something that is contrary to God’s law, it is right for the wife to refuse.

If a husband is forbidding the wife to do that which God’s law requires, it is right for the wife to disobey her husbands.

If a husband is abusive the wife should remove herself from the situation. Though he may choose to stay in the home, the abusive man has abandoned his wife by his thorough violation of the marriage covenant.

Great care needs to be taken here. It is easy for someone who wants out of a marriage relationship to level the charge of abuse against their spouse. I have witnessed both husbands and wives claim that their spouse is abusive so as to have grounds for divorce. Upon closer examination it became clear that there was no abuse, only a difficult and unhappy marriage. A difficult and unhappy marriage is not grounds for divorce, but abuse is.

Lastly, if a husband is unfaithful to his wife she does not sin by divorcing him.

There are limitations to a wife’s submission.

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V. A wife’s submission is voluntary.

Fifthly, it should be said that a wife’s submission is voluntary.

I suppose there is a twofold exhortation in this point, one for the wives and one for the husbands.

Wives, how important it is for you to simply decide to honor your husbands in this way. At some point you simply need to choose to do it.

Husbands, you cannot make your wives submit. If your wife is disrespectful to you and unwilling to follow your lead the way to change her is not through domineering behavior, but through love. Your wife must won, brothers. Husbands, love your wives. Pray for them. Live with them in an understanding way. Yes, confront their sin! But do it with kindness. Love them with the love of Christ. Brothers, how did Christ bring you to the place of submission to himself? How did bring you the place of calling him Lord? Did he not gently woo you? Did he not draw you to himself with his love? Did he not win you so that you offered up your submission willingly?

A wife’s respect and loving submission should be won, for her submission must be offered up voluntarily.

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VI. God may use a wife’s submission change her husband.

Sixthly, it is important to reminder that God may use a wife’s submission to change her husband.

If a husband is living sinfully it is right for a wife to desire that he change for the good. The question is how to best bring about that change.

The worldly wife will seek to change her husband through nagging, withdrawing, withholding, threatening, and other manipulative tactics. The godly wife will seek to change her husband by her respectful and pure conduct.

Notice that I did not say that a wife’s submission will win her husband, only that a wife’s submission may win him. Why then should a wife be respectful to her husband if it is not a guaranteed method to bring about transformation? She is to do it, not because it is effective, but because it is right. The will of the Lord is that wives submit to their husbands. And God may use a wife’s submission to change her husband.

Wives, lovingly submit to your husbands and pray for them. It may be that God uses your respectful and pure conduct to win your husband. God may still win your husbands even if you choose the way of worldly manipulation, but he will win him in spite of you and not through you. If you wish to be used by God to win your husband, live a respectful and pure life before him, and pray for him always.

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VII: A word to single women: marry in the Lord.

Seventhly, and lastly, I have a brief word to the single women who hope to marry in the future. Sisters, marry in the Lord. Be resolved to marry a man who has made a credible profession of faith and shows evidence of pursuing true holiness in Christ Jesus.

When you say “I do” on that wedding day you agreeing to sit in the passenger seat of the marriage as you allow your husband to lead. Choose to marry someone who will drive responsibly. How important it is to marry in the Lord! How important it is to marry someone who has truly surrendered themselves to the authority of God in Christ Jesus.

Some women, I am afraid, are too picky when choosing a spouse. They are waiting for Mr. Perefect to stroll along. Sisters, he doesn’t exist! But others are far too naive. They are willing to marry the first thing that shows interest in them.

Sisters, marry someone who seems to be true Christ follower, one who is interested in growing in the knowledge of the Lord, in holiness and in grace, one who is willing to lead you in Christ Jesus according to the word of God.

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Conclusion

In conclusion, what is the wives role in the marriage relationship? She is to submit to her husband in the Lord. She is to take the position of “helper”. She is to submit even when it is difficult, entrusting herself ultimately to God. There are limitations, of course, and these have been stated. A wives submission must be voluntary. And do not forget wive’s, the Lord may use your submission to change your husbands. Finally, if you are single now and wish to marry in the future, be sure to marry in the Lord.

Posted in Sermons Joe Anady 1 Peter 3:1-7 Genesis 2:24-25
Comments Off on Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Wife Posted by Joe

Nov
18

Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Husband

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24–25

New Testament Reading: Ephesians 5:22–33

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:22–33, ESV)

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Introduction

In the previous sermon we began to address the question, how can we have a successful and God honoring marriage? Three answers were given: One, a husband and wife must learn to love one another in Christ Jesus. Two, a husband and wife must learn to extend mercy and grace to one another in Christ Jesus. And three, a husband and wife must be long suffering. These three answers were directed towards both the husband and wife. A marriage will be healthy if both the husband and wife decided to love one another, extend grace to one another, and are long suffering.

In this sermon we are again asking the question, how can we have a successful and God honoring marriage?, but the focus will be upon the particular role that husbands play in the marriage relationship according to the scriptures. Yes, there are general principles that must be applied by both the husband and the wife – both are to love, extend grace, be long suffering, etc. But the scriptures are also clear that husbands have a particular role to play within the marriage. How should we go about building successful and God honoring marriages? One, husbands must love their wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for her. Next week we will turn our attention to the wives and say, wives must submit to their own husbands as to the Lord.

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I. Husbands, Love Your Wives Just As Christ Also Loved The Church And Gave Himself Up For Her

Today our focus is on husbands.

The scriptures are clear that husbands are to take the lead within the marriage relationship. A husband is to view himself as responsible for the wellbeing of his wife and family, for this is how God views him. The husband is to do everything in his power to care for his wife and children physically, emotionally and spiritually (the words “in his power” are important, for there are some things that are beyond our control).

This principle is clearly communicated in Ephesians 5:23 which says, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior” (Ephesians 5:23, ESV). Paul says something similar in 1 Corinthians 13:3 where he writes, “But I want you to understand that the head of every man is Christ, the head of a wife is her husband, and the head of Christ is God” (1 Corinthians 11:3, ESV). The idea being communicated here is that the husband has authority within the marriage and the home. It is not absolute authority. God and Christ have authority over the husband. But the husband does have authority within the home. Put differently, husbands have a responsibility to lovingly lead their wives and their families in all things.

Now before we progress any further it should be noticed that this order of things is rooted, not in culture, but in creation. In others words, this statement, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church” is based, not upon the cultural norms of Paul’s day, but upon God’s design for the marriage relationship established at creation.

There are many even within the church today who would claim that the words of the Apostle Paul concerning male headship in the home do not apply to us today. And how do these so called “Bible believing Christians” defend their position? They claim that Paul’s words in Ephesians 5 and 1 Corinthians 11 simply reflect the predominate view of the culture in which Paul lived. According to their view this order involving male headship is not to be taken as timeless and unchanging, but has changed with the evolution of culture. A hallmark of liberal and progressive theology is the expectation that religion will and, more than that, ought to evolve over time. In their view our culture has progressed beyond the chauvinistic and misogynistic culture of Paul’s day, and is therefore to be preferred.

At least two things should be said in response to this view.

First of all, the scriptures do not in any way promote chauvinism or misogyny, but insist that men and women stand before God on equal footing. Both males and females are made in God’s image. They are equal in worth. The same Apostle who said, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church” also said, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28, ESV). Viewed from the standpoint of our worth and our position before God in Christ, there is no distinction between men and women. If we had the time it would not be difficult to demonstrate that Jesus himself had a view of women that was radically different from the one the was predominate within his culture. He honored women. And much could also be said concerning the prominent role that women played within the early church and the respect that was shown to them. It is in fact ignorant to claim that the scriptures, Old Testament or New, promote chauvinism or misogyny. They simply do not.

Secondly, the words of the Apostle concerning male headship are rooted, not in cultural norms, but in the order of creation. Are there some things described in the Bible that are cultural? Are there some instances where, upon studying a passage of scripture, it is right for us to say, “well, that was how they did things then, but we do things differently now, and that is okay”? Yes, of course! But we must prove that a thing was merely cultural, or that it was unique to the Old Covenant and is not for the New, before we disregard it. Some, I am afraid, disregard the clear teaching of scripture by using the excuse, “that was for then, but times are different now” while offering up no evidence at all for the thing being rooted in culture. The end result is that many truths that are in fact timeless and unchanging – truths that are meant to be believed and obeyed by the people of God in every generation – are carelessly thrown into the trash, and the results are devastating.

When Paul says, “For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church” he is not saying, “this is how we do things in our culture”. Instead he is saying, this should be true of every marriage – particularly Christian marriages – in every time and place because this is how God designed marriage to be. The marriage relationship was designed why God to function as a picture of Christ’s relationship to the church. The husband is to be to the wife what Christ is to the church, and the wife is to be to the husband what the church is to Christ. This is not a cultural phenomenon, but is God’s design for marriage established at creation.

In 1 Timothy 2 Paul addresses the role that men and women are to take within the church. What we find is that the role of men and women within the church mirrors the role of husband and wife in the home. It is the men who are to take the lead ands have authority in the home and in the church. Now, this is not a sermon about the role of men and women in the church, but I hope you are at least able to see the connection. And notice how Paul argues for male leadership within the church. Again, he does not argue from culture, but from creation, when he says, “I do not permit a woman to teach or to exercise authority over a man; rather, she is to remain quiet [as it pertains to teaching, I take it]. For Adam was formed first, then Eve” (1 Timothy 2:12–13, ESV). Much can be said about this, but for now notice that Paul roots his teaching concerning the roles of men and women within the church, not in culture, but in creation when he says, “for Adam was formed first, then Eve.” In essence he says, this is how things should be because this is how God designed it to be. Adam was formed first. Adam was the one responsible to keep the covenant. Adam was appointed to be the federal head or representative for all. Adam was to lead Eve, he was to guard her and protect her, and Eve was to be a help to him. This was God’s design at creation.

As I am saying all of this you are probably thinking to yourself, I know the story of the fall of man as recorded in Genesis 3. Didn’t the opposite of this happen? Didn’t the serpent approach Eve first? Wasn’t Adam absent? Didn’t Eve, instead of being a help to Adam, serve at the agent by which the temptation came to him? Yes! And that is the point. God designed Adam to function as the head of Eve, and for Eve to be his helper, but the opposite is what came to be. The man and the women decided to do things their own way. Indeed, this is what is at the heart of all our sin. We sin when we disregard God’s word and decide to go our way.

What does God’s word say concerning the proper role of the husband in the marriage relationship? God’s word says, “the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church…” The husband is to lead, therefore, just as a Christ leads his people. The husband is responsible for the wellbeing of his wife, just as Christ took responsibility for the wellbeing of his people. The husband is to do everything in his power to care for his wife physically, emotionally and spiritually. The husband has authority over his wife and family, just as Christ has authority over his church. “The husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church…”

I do sympathize with those in the world who shutter and cringe upon hearing the words, “the husband has authority over his wife and family, just as Christ has authority over his church”. I sympathize with them because I understand how easy and common it is for this principle of male headship to be misunderstood, misused, and even abused within marriage and family.

Is it true that the husband is head of the wife, and that the husband has authority within the home? Yes, we confess this is true. But what do sinful men often do with their God given authority? It is not uncommon for men to either neglect it or abuse it.

Many are negligent, irresponsible and even absent.

Some are domineering, oppressive, and even abusive.

This is the what many have experienced, and so it is no wonder that they have a more difficult time warmly receiving the words of scripture, “for the husband is the head of the wife”.

What we are proposing is that in Christ it is possible for a husband to lovingly lead. Authority and self-sacrificing love are not contrary to one another. In fact they should fit together hand in glove. Anytime a person is given authority, be it as a husband, a parent, a boss, or as an officer within Christ’s church, that authority should be characterized by self sacrificing love.

Do you remember what Jesus said to his disciples when talking about the issue of wielding authority? Jesus called his disciples to himself and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. It shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many’” (Matthew 20:25–28, ESV).

This is how the Christian is to wield authority, whatever authority it happens to be – the Christian is to lead as a servant. The Christian is to govern by laying their lives down for the good of those they govern. Though it might be true that the Christian has first place in some realm, be it in the home, in the work place, in government, or in the church, he or she is to make the wellbeing of those who are under their authority their highest priority, and they are to serve. This is what Christ did for us. “The Son of Man [who has authority over all] came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:25–28, ESV).

When the scriptures say that the husband is head of the wife, this is the thing that is envisioned – a husband who lovingly leads his wife and family with the heart of a servant being ever mindful of the fact that his authority is not ultimate, but that he himself lives under the authority of God.

Notice that in the Ephesians 5 passage husbands are called the “head of the wife” in verse 23, but in verse 25 they are commanded to “love”. Husbands are not commanded be the head of the wife, for this they are by virtue of the marriage covenant itself. But they are commanded to love. In others words, if you are a husband then you are the head of your wife and family. God views you as the one responsable for them. It is not something that you have a say in. A husband simply is the head of the wife, even if he does not realize it or act like it. But in verses 25 a command is delivered. So here is something that husbands must choose to do. A husband must choose to love his wife.

Verse 25: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.” (Ephesians 5:25–30, ESV)

Husbands are to love their wives in the same way that Christ loved church. The question that husbands should now ask themselves is, how did Christ love the church? If I am to love my wife in the same way that Christ loved the church then I must know something of the way that Christ loved the church if I hope to imitate him in the marriage relationship.

I have seven observations about Christ’s love for the church and its implications for the Christian husband. I will move through them rather quickly. I should also say that if you were to pick up Jim Newheiser’s book, “Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage” and open to chapter 12 you would notice that these seven points are the seven headings of that chapter.

First of all, husbands should love their wives unconditionally.

It should be remembered that when we are talking about love we are speaking, not of emotion primarily, but action. To love is to do good to another. Love does often involve feelings of affection, but affection is the fruit of love, not the root.

And what is unconditional love? It is love that is given without condition. It is love extended to another without requiring the one being loved to earn it or merit it in any way.

Ask yourself this question at a later time – is my love for my wife conditional or unconditional? In other words, do you love your wife only when she seems lovely to you, or do you love her irregardless of her loveliness? I would suggest to you that our love for others is often conditional love. “I’ll scratch your back if you scratch mine”, we say. Or I’ll love you so long as you love me. Or I love you provided that you are lovely.

But this is not how Christ loved us. Christ’s love for the church was and is unconditional. We did not earn Christ’s love at the beginning, nor must we earn it now that we are in Christ. Christ’s love for his church – that is, for all who are elect in Christ Jesus – is not conditioned upon anything within there creature, but is freely given. Aren’t you thankful that God’s love for us in Christ is unconditional? Those who understand the severity of their sin will admit that they could never earn God’s love. Thankfully, Christ has loved us unconditionally. “For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:6–8, ESV).

Conditional love will probably work just fine in the during engagement or on the honeymoon, but it will not make for a healthy and happy marriage. Truth be told, we are not always lovely. And if our love is conditioned upon the loveliness of our spouse, then we will find it difficult to love for the long haul. Remember the marriage vows. Did you not promise before God and man to love your spouse in sickness and health, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow as long as you both shall live? Truth be told, your spouse will change over time. Some of those changes will indeed be lovely changes, but some changes might be less than lovely. Our physical appearances change over time. Our personalities changes. Our physical heath might deteriorate. So too our mental health mighty deteriorate. Life has its ups and downs. Life is not always lovely. If our love is conditional, it will not endure in the face of difficulty. But if it is unconditional, our love for our spouse will thrive in good times and in bad.

This is there love that God has for us in Christ Jesus. This is the kind of love that a husband is to have for his wife – unconditional love.

Secondly, husbands should love their wives sacrificially.

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” (Ephesians 5:25, ESV), the text says. If a husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church he must lay his life down for her.

Brothers, this is not about taking a bullet for your wife. This is more about cleaning up after breakfast for her. This is not about pushing her off the tracks as the speeding train approaches. This is about choosing to speak to her kindly even if she has been rude to you. This is what it looks like for a husband to give himself up for his wife – he is die to himself daily, cloth himself with the garb of a servant, and live for her good.

Frankly, in some ways it would be easier to lay down your life in a moment of heroism than to lay it down daily in humble, servant hearted, self-sacrificing devotion. Heroic acts, though very good in and of themselves, do agree with our pride. But in order to daily lay your life down in humble, servant hearted, self-sacrificing devotion, you must put sinful pride to death. That is hard for men to do.

Christ did it. He humbled himself to the point of death. And so should we if we are in Christ Jesus. Husbands, “have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:5–8, ESV). Husbands should love their wives sacrificially.

Thirdly, husbands should love their wives with a purifying love.

Brothers, your wife’s faith and her growth in Christ is your responsibility. Now I am not denying that it is ultimately God who must give your wife the gift of faith and grow her up in it by the power of the Spirit. Nor am I denying that your wife has responsibility in the matter – she must choose to believe upon Christ and follow hard after him. What I am saying is that you also are responsible.

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish” (Ephesians 5:25–27, ESV).

Christ loved the church with a purifying love. He did not love us because we were lovely. He loved us to make us lovely. And husbands are to love their wives in this way. Husbands are to love their wives seeking always their sanctification in Christ Jesus.

Husbands, are you praying for and with your wives?

Are you ministering the word to them?

Are you encouraging them to regularly partake of the ordinary means of grace?

Are you promoting their love for God above all things?

Husbands should love their wives with a purifying love.

Fourthly, husbands should love their wives as themselves.

Christ summarized the whole law of God with these words: love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. And secondly, love your neighbor as your self. Husbands, your wife is your closest neighbor. You are to love her as you love yourself.

Notice the observations that Paul makes in Ephesians 5. When a husband loves his wife, he truly does bless himself given the one flesh union that exists between man and wife. “In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’” (Ephesians 5:28–31, ESV).

Husband, do you want to be blessed in life? Then love your wife! Pour yourself into her. Cherish her. Build her up. Encourage her. Labor to provide for her every need – physical, emotional and spiritual. Trust me brother, this will come back to you tenfold. “He who loves his wife loves himself”, given that you are in one flesh union with the women,. To bless her is to bless yourself.

Fifthly, husbands should love their wives with an affectionate love.

I have insisted that love is not an emotion in this series. I think it is important that this be stressed given that in our culture love is often mistaken for an emotion. Love is an action, a way of life, a choice that we make. This is why the scriptures command us to love – love is something we can choose to do. It is not an emotional state that we fall into and out of.

There are times when we must love out of duty. When a person loves an enemy he or she loves out of duty. Sometimes a spouse might seem to be an enemy. But brothers, our wives need more than to be dutifully loved. Husbands should love their wives with an affectionate love.

The marriage covenant is a covenant of companionship. When the marriage is healthy and husband and wife should consider one another friends. Romance should be present within the marriage. A husband should strive to be emotionally connected with his wife. He should rejoice over her. He should love here with an affectionate love.

Affection can be cultivated, friends. When a husband chooses to gives thanks to God for his wife, his affections for her grows. When a husband prays for his wife, his affection for her grows. When a husband chooses to show love to his wife, his affection for her grows. When a husband treats his wife with kindness and respect, his affection for her grows. When a husband praises his wife with his words and express his love and appreciation for her, his affection for her grows.

Love is not the same as affection, but our love should be affectionate. Be tender to your wives, men. Invest into her emotionally.

Sixthly, husbands should love their wives with an understanding love.

Men will often joke that they cannot understand their wives. Truth be told, if a man cannot understand his wife it is probably because he has not tried very hard.

Certainly we know that it is not impossible for a husband to understand his wife, for this is what God expects of husbands. 1 Peter 3:7 says, “husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7, ESV). Are you telling me that God’s word is here commanding us to do that which is impossible? Is God really threatening us with hindered prayers if we fail to do that which is exceedingly difficult? No! It seem much more reasonable to think that this command to “live with your wives in an understanding way” is something that is very doable. Every Christian man is capable of it. In fact, if you are not doing it, it because you have have chosen not to do it, which is why your prayers will be hindered according to the Lord. Husbands must seek to understand their wives.

Brother, do you know your wife? Do you understand her strengths and weakness? Do you know what brings her joy and what causes her to fear? Do you know what makes her feel secure? Can you discern when she is struggling spiritually and emotionally? Do you know what makes her feel loved? Do you live with her in an understanding way?

Notice that Peter refers to wives as a weaker vessel. I have pointed out before that the wife is the weaker vessel, in part, because of the position that she has been asked to take within the marriage, namely, one of submission to her husband. The other reality is that women are called weaker vessels because they tend to be more delicate and fragile when compared to men. They are more delate physically, and they tend to be more delicate emotionally. Men should never take advantage of this, but instead they should live with them in an understanding way, show honor to them, and handle them as they would a precious and delicate vessel.

Seventhly, and lastly, husbands should love their wives with an affirming love.

Let me simply read a quotation from Newheiser’s book, “Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage” to make this final point.

“Many husbands are very critical. They manage their homes by exception, ignoring what is done right, while carefully pointing out ways their wives fall short of their expectations. Constant criticism is like a cancer that eats away at a marriage. In contrast, the husband in Proverbs 31 praises his wife, saying, “Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all” (v. 29). Your wife is not perfect, but neither are you. Make every effort to affirm to her the good that God is doing for you and others through her. Ray Ortlund writes, ‘Deep in the heart of every wife is the self-doubt that wonders, ‘Do I please him? Am I whats he dreamed of and longed for? Will he love me to the end? Am I safe with this man I married? Will he cast me off? Even if we go the distance will he get tired of me?’ A wise husband will understand that that uncertainty, that question, is way down deep in his wife’s heart. And he will spend his life speaking into it gently and tenderly communicating it to her in many ways, ‘Darling, you are the one I want. I cherish you. I rejoice over you as no other… I love the thought of growing old together with you, hand in hand all the way. I will hold you close to my heart until my dying day’” (Newheiser, 92).

Husbands should love their wives with an affirming love.

*****

Conclusion

Brothers, in short it is time that we man up and love our wives as Christ loved the church. Any fool can be an irresponsible husband. Any fool can be a self-centered, domineering, manipulative, authoritarian husband. A Christian husband is the love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for he. This is something that you and I must simply decide to do.

The excuse “this kind of love was not modeled for me” will not do. It may be that your earthly father did not model it, but your heavenly Father has: “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.” (John 3:16, ESV)

Tell me friend, do you know the love of Christ?

Are you now abiding in the love of Christ, living in ongoing reliance upon his sustaining power?

Then let us love one another as he has loved us to the praise of his glorious grace.

Posted in Sermons Joe Anady Genesis 2:24-25; Ephesians 5:22–33
Comments Off on Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Husband Posted by Joe

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Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Wife

Sermon: Genesis 2:24-25: Marriage, Divorce, And Remarriage: The Responsibilities Of The Husband