Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24-25

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:24–25, ESV)

New Testament Reading: John 15:1-16

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. Already you are clean because of the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing. If anyone does not abide in me he is thrown away like a branch and withers; and the branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. By this my Father is glorified, that you bear much fruit and so prove to be my disciples. As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full. This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another.” (John 15:1–17, ESV)

Introduction 

Brothers and sisters, in this third sermon in this series within a series on the subject of marriage, divorce and remarriage I would like to focus in upon the subject of entering into marriage – how should a person prepare to enter into the marriage relationship? We have already devoted two sermons to answering the question, what is marriage? In the weeks to come we will address the marriage relationship itself as we ask, how can we have a healthy and successful marriage? And finally we will address the difficult and rather unpleasant subject of divorce and remarriage. Truly, the word of God is a light to our feet in all these matters, and so to the word of God we must go. Today, I wish to offer some brief remarks concerning entering into marriage. My objective is to help those who hope to marry in the future to prepare well for marriage beginning even now. 

I realize that by introducing this sermon in the way that I have it is possible that some will assume that this sermon will have nothing at all for them. 

To those who are young it might seem as if entering into marriage is a long, long way off. To the young I would say, little brother, little sister, time moves very quickly. Your wedding day might be here before you know it. You had better start preparing for it now. So listen up! 

Those who are married now might be thinking, how can a sermon on the subject of entering marriage possibly be for me given that I have already entered into it? Let me ask you two questions: One, do you have children, or do you plan to have children? If so, please understand that their wedding day might be here before you know it. One of your responsibilities as a parent is to prepare your children for marriage, whether or not it be the Lord’s will for them. This is something that we must always remember, parents: our objective is not to hold on to our children forever, but to raise them so that we might release them to establish households of their own. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”, the scriptures say. May the Lord use this brief sermon to help parents help their children to prepare will for marriage. Two, if you are married now would you be willing to consider that perhaps in some ways you entered into your marriage ill prepared? I do not want you to be discoursed by this. Instead my desire is that, having recognized what was lacking in the preparation, you would now work to remedy the weaknesses. May the Lord be pleased to use this sermon on entering marriage even to those who are married now. 

And still there are others who are single now and do not plan to marry, or who are married now but do not have children in the home. To you I would say, rejoice that these truths are being taught within or community, and pray for those who are to wed in the future, that they would prepare for marriage and enter into this holy union well and to the glory of our covenant making and covenant keeping God. Also, I trust and pray that plenty of principles will put forth in this sermon that you will be able to pick up and make your own, though they may not apply to you in the same way that they will apply to the one who is preparing for, or helping their children to prepare for, marriage in the future.

Well, enough of me trying to convince everyone to listen to this sermon. Let’s get on with it. How should a person prepare for marriage? What should a Christian think and do now so that he or she might enter into the marriage relationship (if it be God’s will for them to marry) well equipped and ready to thrive in it to the glory of God?

Pursue Holiness And Maturity In Christ Jesus In The Whole of Life

Pursue holiness and maturity in Christ in all that you think, say and do.

Pursue holiness and maturity in Christ in all that you think.

Pursue knowledge.

Pursue wisdom.

Cultivate purity of thought.

Pursue holiness and maturity in Christ in all that you say.

Have you learned to control your tongue?

Have you learned how to communicate?

Have you learned how to work through conflict without sinning?

Pursue holiness and maturity in Christ in all that you do. 

Have you learned the way of Christ, which is to die to self and to live for others?

Do you keep God’s law? Do you love God with all your heart, soul mind and strength, and your neighbor as yourself? Or do you selfishly love yourself, and live for your own pleasure?

These things can and should be cultivated, not after the wedding day, but well before it. Maturity in Christ should be developed today. 

Let me speak very directly now to the teenagers and preteens. amongst us. I know that some of you are thinking about marriage already. I’m no fool. I know that some of you, perhaps the girls in particular, have thought about marriage. And what I am saying to you is that you need to start preparing for it now. No, I’m not talking about finding a spouse. I’m not talking about planning the wedding day, or anything like that. I’m talking about you preparing yourself – you working on you, so that when the day (if the Lord wills) you are ready to be a good and godly husband, or a good and godly wife. 

How can you prepare? 

Do you know Christ?

Is God your first love?

Do you know God’s word? Do you have it in your heart? Do you read it for yourself? Do you pay attention when it is read to you and preached? Do you work to put it into practice. Mature and godly husbands and wives know God’s word and they seek to obey it in the whole of life.

Do you pray? 

Do you know how to love others? If you do not know how to love others now, why do you think you will be able to love your husband or wife after your are married? And what does it mean to love others? It involves you dying to yourself, and doing good for someone else. 

I’ll tell you what it looks like for a young man or young woman to be well prepared for marriage. When I see a young person notice a pile of dishes in the sink and begin to wash them with a good attitude and without being ask, that is a sign of maturity. That is an indicator this one has learned the joy serving others instead of the misery of living for oneself.

When I see a young man speak kindly to his siblings even if they have been rude to him…

When I see a young woman who is able to work through conflict…

The problems that arise within marriage relationships are not produced by the marriage, but by the sinfulness of those who are wed. The marriage relationship is simply the realm or the context in which the sinfulness of the husband’s heart and the wife’s heart are manifest. 

The problem is not the marriage, but the people who are wed. 

Imagine a truly godly and mature Christian man and a godly and mature Christian woman.  Now imagine that these two are married. And now try to imagine their marriage being bad. Can you do it?

It is difficult for me to imagine two godly and mature people having a terrible marriage. 

I can imagine a difficult marriage if one is godly and mature, and the other not.

I can imagine a marriage being very difficult if both husband and wife are ungodly and immature. 

But it is very difficult for me to imagine a marriage being anything less than good – even great –  if indeed the husband and wife have both cultivated personal holiness and have a mature walk with Christ. Will their marriage be perfect? No, for even the “godly” among us are not perfect. Will there be room for growth in this marriage? Yes! The godly and mature husband and wife will continually deepen in their understanding of God, of themselves, of one another and of the marriage relationship. But if they are godly and mature – if they love God supremely, if they have learned to walk humbly before him, if they know what it is to die to self and to live for the good of others, if they have self-control in thought word and deed, then it is difficult to imagine their marriage relationship being anything other than good and ever improving. 

Do you want a good marriage? Cultivate personal holiness and maturity in Christ Jesus.  

Heart transformation is needed. Sanctification is needed. Maturity in Christ is needed. All of this should be sought and cultivated well in advance of the wedding day. Sadly, many do not realize how weak, immature and self-centered they are util the marriage relationship is used by God to reveal it! Thanks be to God that he uses the marriage relationship to sanctify his people. We should rejoice in this. But wouldn’t it be better to prepare for marriage by walking in humble submission to God and his word, pursuing holiness and maturity in Christ prior to  marriage, so that we might enter into the union well equipped. Do your future spouse a favor and pursue holiness in the whole of life even now.  

Know What You Are Looking For In A Future Spouse

How should a person prepare for marriage?

Secondly, it is important for you to know what you are looking for in a future spouse.

Make a list. Prioritize that list. 

Tall, dark and handsome should not be at the top of that list. Thankfully those three things were not at the top of Lindsay’s, for I certainly wouldn’t have made the cut. 

Yes, it is somewhat important that we be attracted to the person we will someday marry. A bride and groom should be attracted to one another physically and emotionally.  

But I would suggest to you that other things besides physical appearance and even compatibility, so called, should be higher on our list.

Consider that many marriages throughout the world today are arranged marriages. And consider that most marriages throughout history were arranged marriages. The dating thing that we do in our culture is really quite unusual when compared to the rest of the world and to historical practices. And those arranged marriages work. Now, I am not advocating that we adopt the practice of arranged marriages. I will admit that the practice is more appealing than ever before now that my daughters are approaching adult hood. 

The point I am making is that marriages can be very, very healthy even if the issue of physical or emotional attraction is not at the very top of the list driving the relationship. In fact, think of how shallow and vain a relationship will be if physical and emotional attraction is the thing driving it.

It is far better to have other things – things of substance – at the top of your list and to allow the issue of attraction attraction and compatibly to round it out.   

For the Christian the thing that must be at the very top of the list is the question, are they in Christ? Are they united to Christ by faith?

This is not just the opinion or preference of your parents and your pastor, but is the very word of God. 

Do not be unequally yoked.

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said, “I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. Therefore go out from their midst, and be separate from them, says the Lord, and touch no unclean thing; then I will welcome you, and I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty” (2 Corinthians 6:14–18, ESV).

They must be in the Lord. 

“A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.” (1 Corinthians 7:39, ESV).

They must be truly in the Lord. 

“Thus you will recognize them by their fruits” (Matthew 7:20, ESV).

Some come to faith after marriage and thus find themselves a believer married to a non-believer. In such instances the Christian should remain, “For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?” (1 Corinthians 7:16, ESV). But here we are talking about entering into marriage. 

For the Christian, that the future spouse be a Christian – and truly a Christian –  must be at the top of the list. From there you should be looking for someone who is mature in Christ – someone who is sound in doctrine and faithful in his or her way of life. 

Be patient. 

If they must also be tall, dark and handsome, then good luck. I am not saying that such creatures do not exist, only that you should take great care in forming your list. Have the right things at the top, and the right things on the bottom, and be willing to abandon the non-essential things as you go along.

Know what you are looking for in a future spouse.

Approach Dating Relationships And Engagement In A Godly Way

Thirdly, and lastly, may I encourage you to approach dating relationships and engagement in godly way? Another way to say this is that a Christian should approach dating relationships and engagement in a way that is consistent with our faith in general, and our view of marriage in particular.

Pre-adults, respect your parents. They have experiences and wisdom that you don’t have. 

Courtship or dating? Engagement or betrothal? I don’t care what you call it! Engage these things in a godly way. 

Dating

Sexual purity

Emotional purity

Recognize that you are developing relational habits in your dating relationships. 

Date/court with a view towards marriage. 

Engagement

Engaged people are not married people. 

Maintain sexual purity 

No cohabitation

Engaged people should be preparing, not only for the wedding, but especially for the marriage. 

Conclusion

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24-25

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:24–25, ESV)

New Testament Reading: 1 Corinthians 7:12–16

“To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?” (1 Corinthians 7:12–16, ESV)

Introduction 

Brothers and sisters, in this sermon series within a series on the subject of marriage, divorce and remarriage we will eventually address topics such as entering into marriage, having a successful marriage, challenges in marriage, as well as the topic of divorce and remarriage, but today we are still addressing foundational matters. We are answering the question, “what is marriage?” Or, better yet, “what do we learn about the marriage relationship when we look to the pages of Holy Scripture?” 

I have three foundational observations to make. What is marriage? One, marriage is a covenant. Two, marriage is for the glory of God. And three, marriage is for the good of humanity.

Marriage Is A Covenant

It should be remembered that the first of these three observations was presented last week. What is marriage? Marriage is, first of all, a covenant. 

Remember the definition that was provided. Marriage is “a lifelong covenant of companionship between a man and a woman that has been established under God and before the community” (Newheiser, Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage, 6).

Marriage is a covenant. More specifically, marriage it is a covenant made between one man and one woman. It is a covenant made under God. It is a covenant is made before others. The marriage covenant authorizes sexual intimacy. And the marriage covenant is to last until death. All of this was presented in the previous sermon.But before we move on from this foundational point I would like to tease it out a bit more. 

I pray that you would comprehend how important it is to view marriage as a covenant. In marriage a man makes a promise before God and witnesses to be faithful to a woman. And the woman also makes a promise before God and witnesses to be faithful to a man. This they promise to do until separated by death. What a solemn thing it is to make such a promise. What a serious thing it is to enter into such a covenant. Truly, there is no other relationship on planet earth like the relationship that exists between husband and wife. Two individuals who were were at one time interlay unrelated are joined together by God as one flesh as they enter into this covenantal bond. The marriage covenant is the glue that holds the marriage relationship together. A husband and wife are to stick together though thick and thin, and for what reason? Because they made a promise to one another before God and before witnesses that they would. 

While I was growing up I remember being taught that divorce is not an option. I’m grateful to have been taught that lesson for, generally speaking, it is true – divorce is not an option.

I say “generally speaking” because there are, of course, exceptions to this rule. Divorce, as we will see later in this series, is an option in the case of adultery or abandonment (and I think it is right to see abuse as a form of abandonment – more on that later). If a spouse is sexually unfaithful then the other is permitted (but not required) to divorce them. If a spouse abandons the marriage then the other is permitted to divorce. But these two biblical grounds for divorce are exceptions to the general rule that divorce is not an option.

Think of the impact that these principles will have upon a marriage if they are believed and adopted. If a couple views marriage as being a lifelong covenant of companionship, and, connected to that, if a couple decides from the start that divorce is not an option for them, then that couple will have set their marriage relationship down upon a fairly firm foundation. 

More needs to be said, of course. For our highest goal is not simply to remain married to the end. No, more than that we wish to thrive in our marriages to the glory of God. But here is a firm foundation upon which to stand. Marriage is a livelong covenant of companionship. Divorce is not an option.    

Therefore, when we experience difficulties in the marriage relationship divorce should not even be on our minds. Certainly the treat of it should never be on our lips. Never should a husband or wife threaten divorce. 

As I said earlier the scriptures do permit divorce in two situations – when a spouse has committed adultery or in the case of abandonment (abuse being a form of abandonment). In these difficult situations  the spouse that has been sinned against is indeed free (not required) to divorce.  But think of it, even in these extreme instances divorce, though it be permitted, does not need to be threatened. The one who has been sinned against needs to make a decision with the help of godly counsel as to if they will divorce or remain, but he or she does not need to threaten divorce. Never should the threat of divorce be used as a weapon – as a way to gain the upper hand in an argument.

I’m afraid that many do have divorce on the mind and even upon their lips, not in the extreme cases of adultery and abandonment, but even when facing the ordinary and common struggles of marriage. 

Brothers and sisters, I hope that you would agree that this is ungodly behavior. If God created marriage to be a lifelong covenant of companionship, and if God has given only two instances in which divorce is permitted, then it is wrong for us to have divorce on our minds, in our hearts, and proceeding from our lips as a threat when the relationship is difficult and tumultuous. To ponder or threaten divorce when there are no grounds for it is to disobey God’s word on the matter.

Because marriage is a lifelong covenant of companionship ordinarily divorce is not an option. A husband and wife are to sick like glue to one another even if there are many factors and forces at work to pull them apart. And this is particularly true for the Christian. While it is true for all humanity that marriage is a lifelong covenant of companionship, the Christian should definitely know it this and live accordingly. And I would also argue that it is particularly possible for the Christian to live accordingly given our worldview. It is our worldview that makes it possible for us to stay through thick and thin. The Christian believes that there is a God to whom we must give an account. We believe that this God is our heavenly Father. He is faithful to his people and is willing and able to sustain his people. We believe that our God is able to change lives. How do you know, therefore, if your conduct will not lead to the salvation of your husband or wife? How do you know if your conduct will not lead to the sanctification of your husband or wife? The world is quick to leave, in part, because they do not have a biblical worldview. With God there is hope. And this hope enables us to persevere in the midst of difficulty. 

Marriage Is For The Glory of God

Secondly, marriage is for the glory of God.

What is marriage? Marriage is, first of all, a covenant. Secondly, marriage is for the glory of God. 

In just a moment I will make the point that marriage is for our good. Indeed, marriage is good. It is, in fact, very good. There is much to say about the goodness of marriage for the man and woman who enter into this union. But before we talk about how good marriage is for us, we must emphasize that marriage is for God’s glory. This is the proper order of things. What is the benefit of marriage? First, it is for the glory of God, and after that it is for our good. I’m afraid that we tend to have this backwards, though. We tend to enter into marriage for our enjoyment, and the idea that it is for God’s glory remains a distant afterthought. The truth is that the institution of marriage in general, and our marriage relationships in particular, are, above all else, for the glory of God. 

In fact the one who is mature in Christ understands that everything is for the glory of God. Everything that was made by God was made so that the glory of God might be manifest. “The heavens declare the glory of God, and the sky above proclaims his handiwork. Day to day pours out speech, and night to night reveals knowledge. There is no speech, nor are there words, whose voice is not heard. Their voice goes out through all the earth, and their words to the end of the world… (Psalm 19:1–4, ESV). Everything that we think, say and do is to be for the glory of God. “So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God” (1 Corinthians 10:31, ESV). Certainly, marriage is to bring glory to God.  

The institution of marriage itself is for the glory of God. It functions as a picture of God’s relationship to his people. Just as God entered into a covenantal relationship with his people at the beginning of time, so too the first man and woman were joined together in one flesh union by way of covenant. This was true in the beginning and in the garden prior to man’s fall into sin. And it remained true even after man’s fall into sin. God graciously provided a way for sinners to approach him. This was accomplished by way of the Covenant of Grace which was promised shortly after the fall and would be ratified in Christ’s blood. Marriage, therefore, functions as picture of God’s covenantal relationship with his people, particularly the union that exists between Christ and the church, God’s redeemed bride. 

This is the clear teaching of the New Testament. Paul, after discussing the marriage relationship in general, and the particular role of the husband and wife who are joined together in one flesh union, says, “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church” (Ephesians 5:32, ESV). In other words the one flesh union enjoyed by the husband and wife in the marriage bond is mysterious and really it is about – it pertains to and is a picture of – Christ’s union with the church. The covenant of marriage is itself an analogy of God’s covenantal union with his people brought about though the Redeemer. The institution of marriage is itself for the glory of God. It is a picture of God’s covenantal faithfulness to man. 

And certainly we bring glory to God when our particular marriages are as they should be. 

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we are faithful to one another just as God is faithful. 

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we act selflessly towards one another just as God in Christ was selfless, laying down his life for his bride, the church. 

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we are kind, tender and compassionate to one another just as God is kind, tender and compassionate towards his children. 

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we are gracious towards one another just as God is gracious to us in Christ Jesus. 

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we love one another just as Christ loves us.

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant when we truly forgive one another just as God has forgiven all our sins in Christ Jesus.

We bring glory to God in the marriage covenant we are united together as close companions as a reflection of our union with the Father through the Son and by the Spirit.  

The institution of marriage was itself designed to function as a picture of the covenantal union which exists between God and his people, but do you see that this institution is terribly marred by sin when the husband and wife live, not according to the design and will of God, but according to the wisdom and will of fallen man. The marriage relationship fails to give glory to God when approach it wrongly and live sinfully within it. 

Brothers and sisters, will you bring glory to God’s name through your marriage, or will you bring shame to his name? I would urge to stop settling for a mediocre, or worse yet, sinful marriage, and to strive for a marriage in which God is glorified. Be faithful to your spouse in thought, word and deed. Selflessly serve one another as God in Christ has served us – lay down your life for the good of the other. Be kind, tender and compassionate towards one another. Speak kind words. Be gentle. See to understand the other. Extend mercy and grace. Forgive from the heart. Cultivate closeness, intimacy, friendship. Love one as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. Stop settling for mediocre marriages and strive for one that is Christlike. Strive for a marriage that brings glory to God. 

As you strive for a marriage that is God honoring you will find that the world, your sinful flesh and the evil one himself will fight against you all along the way, but in Christ we have the victory. 

Marriage Is For The Good of Humanity

Thirdly, and lastly, we must confess that marriage is for the good of humanity. 

Much has been said in this sermon about the difficulty of marriage. Marriage can be difficult. It is important for us to teach that it is a covenant and that divorce is not an option so that we might persevere in the face of difficulties. Many do enter into the marriage relationship naively assuming that it will be happily ever after for them. This is a terrible mistake, and so we must warn that marriage will be challenging. When two sinful human beings are joined together in one flesh union there are bound to be challenges. 

But may this never obscure the fact that the marriage is really, really good. It is possible to have a great marriage in Christ Jesus. It is possible to mature in marriage to the degree that the relationship can be called “wonderful”. Again, or goal as Christians should not be to endure to the end so that we might say, “at least I was faithful!” Instead we should be striving after a good and godly marriage, one that is truly pleasant and satisfying.

I wonder if our marriage relationships do not remain mediocre because we have convinced ourselves that a good marriage or great marriage is not possible. 

The same is true regarding personal holiness. I wonder if we do not plateau in our walk with Christ because we have convinced ourselves that a good or great walk with Christ is impossible. Perfection is something we should not expect, but it is something we should strive after. It is true that Christian life will be characterized by ups and downs, but let us always strive after holiness, brothers and sisters.

Have you said to yourself, “this is just the way that I am, I cannot change”? Never should a Christian believe such a thing. Christ is able to change you from the heart. Are you impatient and rude? Are you short tempered? Are you self absorbed? And prone to bitterness? Are you a bad communicator? Never should the Christian say, “this is just the way that I am.” Instead, the Christian should pursue holiness – the Christian should expect to be sanctified by the word and Spirit. 

The same principle applies to the marriage relationship. Though it is true that marriage is sometimes difficult. Though it is true that a good marriage requires work. The Christian should expect to have a marriage that is good and even great. With Christ it is possible, my friends. 

Marriage is a covenant. It is for the glory of God. And it is for the good of humanity.

In what ways is the marriage relationship good?

First of all, in the marriage relationship a husband and wife are able to enjoy companionship. 

What a blessing it is to have someone to walk through life with. 

Remember that Eve was created by God to be a helper for Adam. She was not created to be his superior, nor was she created to be his slave. Instead she was designed to be a helper fit for him. 

When I say that a husband and wife are to enjoy companionship I mean that they ought to be relationally close and intimate. They should communicate with one another. A husband and wife should be good friends. 

Brothers and sisters, if companionship or friendship is lacking in your marriage, it can be cultivated. And how can friendship be cultivated in the marriage relationship? By being kind, caring, thoughtful and considerate towards one another.

Secondly, the marriage relationship is good for humanity in that it is good for society. 

The family is the building block of society. When families are healthy, the society is healthy. When the family breaks down, society begins to break down. God’s design is that children be raised in healthy families under the authority of a husband and wife, mother and father. 

It is possible, no doubt, for a single mother or a single father to do a wonderful job at raising their children alone. But here we are addressing God’s design, or the ideal. If the situation is less than is ideal, then a single mother or father would be wise to lean upon others for assistance in raising children. But here I am setting forth the ideal. 

Brothers and sisters, cultivating healthy marriages is very beneficial to society. 

Thirdly, and somewhat connected to the previous concept, the marriage relationship is good in that it is good for the advancement of the kingdom of God. 

The kingdom of God is advanced in this world when husband and wives, mothers and fathers, raise their children in the Lord. I know that in some traditions Christians are urged to be active within the church, serving within various ministries. May I suggest to you that the most important work of all for a husband and wife, mother and father, is the work that is done within the home. Brothers and sisters, do not allow yourselves to become so busy with activities, either in the church or in the community, that you neglect investing into your children particularly when in comes to spiritual things. This is especially important for fathers to hear in our day and age. Slow down, men, and pour into your children. Drop the hobbies, cut back on work, even pull back on service within the church if you must so that you might further God’s kingdom by proclaiming the gospel to your children and raising them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 

Fourthly, the marriage relationship is good in that it contributes the sanctification and holiness of the husband and wife. 

Please hear me, friends. One of the reasons that God has blessed you with your spouse is so that God might use your spouse to bring about your sanctification. What is sanctification? “Sanctification is the work of God’s free grace whereby we are renewed in the whole man after the image of God, and are enabled more and more to die unto sin, and live unto righteousness” (Baptist Catechism Q: 38). And I am saying that one of the primary means that God uses to sanctify his people is the marriage relationship.

At the heart of our sin is pride and self-centeredness. If we lived life all alone a great deal of our pride and self-self-centeredness would go unnoticed and unchecked. But you have probably noticed that it is through our contact with others that our pride and self-self-centeredness becomes evident. 

Friends, there is no closer relationship on earth than the one that exists between husband and wife – the two have become one flesh. If there is pride and self-self-centeredness in the heart it will quickly become evident in the marriage relationship. 

Here is another reason why threatening divorce is sinful. It short-circuits the sanctification process. Imagine the heat being turned up in the marriage – imagine the flames of the refiners fire growing more intense. And then imagine that one or both have the habit of jumping out of the kiln before the work of refinement is done.

Brothers and sisters, do not be surprised when God uses your marriage to refine you spiritually. When conflict arises within the marriage do not double down on your pride and selfishness, not recognize it for what it is, confess it as sin, walk humbly before your God and live for the good others, particularly your spouse.  This is one of the reasons the marriage relationship is good for us given our sinful condition – it will used by God to advance our sanctification.   

Conclusion

Friends, I have three questions to ask you by way of conclusion. 

One, seeing that marriage is a livelong covenant of companionship, are you truly committed to your spouse?  Are you devoted the marriage? Are you “all in” from the heart? Our marriages will be terribly unstable and tumultuous if we waver in our commitment to one another in the heart. Hopefully you meant what you said on your wedding day when you uttered the words, “I take you to be my wedded spouse, and I do promise and covenant before God and these witnesses to be your loving and faithful spouse in sickness and in health, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, as long as we both shall live.” If there was uncertainty in the heart then, or if their is uncertainty in the heart now, it is not too late to fix it. We can, even now, turn from the sin of unfaithfulness in the heart and grow in our resolve. Truly, the one who doubts in the heart will be tossed around like the waves of the sea, and the marriage itself will remain unstable. Are their grounds for divorce? Indeed there are! But let us put that issue to side for a moment and say the more general thing: husbands and wives, marriage is for life! It is a lifelong covenant of companionship.”

Two, seeing that marriage is for the glory God I ask, does your marriage glorify his name? When people look at your marriage (and this includes your children) do they see God’s love, compassion, tenderness, mercy and faithfulness on display? Do they see Christ’s self-less and self-sacrificing love for his church, and the churches reciprocal love for the Savior on display? Or do they see the way of the world? Brothers and sisters, let us do all things for the glory of God. Let us strive for marriages that bring honor to our great King. 

Three, seeing that marriages are for our good, are you pursuing a great marriage in Christ Jesus? Or have you grown content with one that is mediocre? Another way to say this is to ask, are your pursuing holiness in Christ Jesus? Are you pursuing holiness as an individual and in the marriage. 

Ephesians 4:17-32 is one of my favorite passages to use in marriage counseling. Though it does not mention the marriage relationship (Paul turns to marriage in Ephesians 5) it is deeply practical for husbands and wives.  Listen to Paul’s words, and you hear them, think of the marriage relationship. “Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity. But that is not the way you learned Christ!— assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil. Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:17–32, ESV)

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:24-25

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.” (Genesis 2:24–25, ESV)

New Testament Reading: Revelation 21:1–5

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.’ And he who was seated on the throne said, ‘Behold, I am making all things new.’ Also he said, ‘Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.’” (Revelation 21:1–5, ESV)

Introduction 

Brothers and sisters, I would like to take some time now to give attention to the topic of marriage. My plan (as of today) is to devote seven sermons to the topic of marriage, divorce and remarriage. 

Remember that I did something similar with the doctrine of the Sabbath. The creation narrative of Genesis 1 concluded by making mention of the Sabbath Day (Genesis 2:1-3). And after moving through the text of Genesis 1 verse by verse, I devoted 8 sermons to the doctrine of the Sabbath. 

Notice that something similar happens in the creation narrative of Genesis 2. There we find a description of God’s creative activities with special attention given to the creation of the  man and woman, and then the narrative concludes by making mention of the marriage covenant. 

Isn’t it interesting that both the creation narrative of Genesis 1 and the creation narrative of Genesis 2 conclude with institutions. After creating the heavens and the earth, God instituted the Sabbath. And after creating man, male and female – and having entered into covenant with man –  God instituted the marriage covenant. 

I would suggest to you that this pattern is deliberate.  It seems that the Sabbath command brings the creation narrative of Genesis 1 to a conclusion because the Sabbath functions as a sign of God’s creation of the heavens and earth and of the promise of eternal rest held out to the man who was made in his image. And so too the marriage covenant brings to conclusion the creation narrative of Genesis 2 because it functions as a sign of God’s covenantal relationship with his people. The Sabbath command and the marriage covenant, though they differ greatly from one another, share this in common: they signify or symbolize for all humanity truths concerning God and his relationship to man. Whenever the Sabbath day is properly observed something is symbolized concerning God’s relationship with his people. And whenever marriage is properly entered into something is symbolized concerning God’s relationship with his people.

I’ll leave it to you to think more about this. If I go any further this introduction will turn into a sermon all its own. For now I will simply say that I think it is appropriate for us to tease out the topic of marriage now that the principle has been introduced to us in Genesis 2:24-25 just as we teased out the topic of the Sabbath after it was introduced to us in Genesis 2:1-3. Both the Sabbath day and the marriage relationship were instituted by God at creation, they are for all humanity, and they are symbolic institutions.

Please note that the marriage relationship was instituted by God. God is the one who created the marriage relationship. He established it in the beginning when he created the first man and the first women and joined them together as husband and wife. I hope  you are able to recognize how foundational this idea is: the marriage relationship was instituted by God. 

You have noticed, no doubt, that people are very confused about marriage in this culture. There was a time when the majority of the population actually agreed that marriage was a covenant into which one man and one woman would enter for life. Things are different now. The popular view today is that two men may marry, or two women. Why it is that polygamy or polyandry is still taboo, I’m not entirely sure. I would imagine that it is only a matter of time before this is also tolerated – that is, unless God intervenes. Notice also that divorce is much more common and accepted within our culture today. People are very confused about the institution of marriage. 

But I want you to recognize that all of the differences of opinion that exist within our culture concerning marriage can be traced back to a more fundamental question, namely, where did the marriage institution come from? How did this thing that we call marriage come to be?

Many in our culture would say that the institution of marriage came from man. In other words, marriage is the product of societal evolution. A long time ago, someone, somewhere decided that it would be beneficial for man and for society to have this institution that we call “marriage”. Marriage, according to this view, arose spontaneously from the ooze of humanity. 

But what does the Christian say? Our view is that the institution of marriage came from God.  God created the marriage relationship. God is the originator of marriage, and he, therefore, is also the orderer of marriage.

It should not be difficult to see how these differences of opinion regarding the origins of marriage produce all of the other differences of opinion that exist within our culture. 

If the marriage institution was created by man, then man is also free to regulate it. If marriage is the product of societal evolution, then we should expect that the institution will undergo constant change. For many within our culture the legalization of gay marriage is viewed as progress. It fits perfectly with their presuppositions concerning the origins of the institution. They applaud the legalization of gay marriage because they have first believed that the marriage institution came from man and is constantly evolving. Who is authorized to decided what marriage is? Man is, according to this view!

But if marriage was instituted by God in the beginning – if it was designed by him – then we should not expect nor desire that it be changed. The Christian does not say, how might we improve this thing called marriage? but instead, Oh, Lord, help us to conform our marriages to your will. If God is the originator of the marriage institution, he is also the orderer of it. Our place is not to create new ways, but to conform our lives to the ways that our Creator has established.  

Do you want to have a marriage that gives glory to God? Do you want to have a marriage that is truly right and good? Do you want a marriage that is blessed of God? Then to his word we must go! We must begin by asking, what have you said, Lord, concerning marriage? And after that we must say, Lord, help us to conform our lives to your most holy word. 

What do we learn about the marriage relationship when we look to the pages of Holy Scripture? I have three foundational observations. One, marriage is a covenant. Two, marriage is for the glory of God. And three, marriage is for the good of humanity. I will elaborate on the first of these today and return to the last two next Sunday, Lord willing. 

First of all, marriage is a covenant. 

It is, to quote one author, “a lifelong covenant of companionship between a man and a woman that has been established under God and before the community” (Newheiser, Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage, 6).

To enter into a covenant is to make a solemn promise. To enter into a covenant is a very serious thing. To break a covenant is a grave sin. 

Notice that the word “covenant” does not appear in Genesis 2. There we simply read, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24, ESV). Clearly it is the marriage relationship that is being described. And though the word “covenant” is not found here, the rest of scripture makes it clear that the marriage relationship is established by way of covenant. 

Other passages could be sited, but Malachi 2:14 will suffice. There the prophet is found rebuking the man who has abandoned his wife, saying, “the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant” (Malachi 2:14, ESV). Marriage is a covenant. The relationship is established by making a solemn oath or promise.

I have five points to make concerning the marriage covenant. 

One, the marriage covenant is made between one man and one woman. 

Last Sunday I read from Mark 10 and that passage where Jesus was being questioned by the Pharisees concerning divorce. And I pointed out how Jesus appealed to this passage here in Genesis 2:24-25 in order to establish God’s ideal for the marriage relationship. Remember how Jesus replied to their questions, saying, “But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mark 10:6–9, ESV). In due time we will come to consider the topic of divorce and remarriage. For now I simply wish to demonstrate how Jesus himself interpreted the Holy Scriptures. When Jesus considered the narrative of Genesis 2 he understood it to be foundational. He understood that when God created the man and the woman and joined them together in one flesh union, it established a pattern to be followed. Where do we find God’s design for marriage? We find it beginning in Genesis 2. 

And what is God’s design for the marriage covenant? His design is that one man and one woman enter into it. It is not right for a man to marry a man. It is not right for a woman to marry a woman. It is not right for a man to marry multiple women. And it is not right for a woman to marry multiple men. All are violations of God’s deign for the marriage relationship. Marriage was instituted at creation. Adam and Eve entered into this covenant. This pattern, therefore, was established for all humanity living in all times and places. Have societies deviated from this design throughout the ages? Indeed they have! But insofar as they deviate from God’s design established at creation we must say that they are in error. 

Homosexuality is everywhere condemned as sin in the Holy Scriptures, Old Testament and the New. It should not be difficult to see that homosexual marriages are sinful and are not valid in God’s eyes when compared with the plain teaching of Holy Scripture. They are sinful relationships and they deviate from God design for the marriage covenant.

Do men sometimes feel attracted to other men? Do women sometimes feel attracted to other women? I do not doubt it at all. But this does not mean that it is right to act upon the feeling. What kind of world would we live in if we allowed ourselves to be governed by the rule “if I feel it then it must be ok for me to act upon it”? Even the homosexual would have to admit that they would not want this rule to govern all conduct. Tell me, what would you say to the drunkard who says, “I was born this way?” Would you not lovingly come alongside him and say, “friend, I understand that your desire to drink to the point of drunkenness is very strong, but you must fight against it.” And what would you say to the angry and abusive person who says, “I cannot help it! The feelings of rage are all consuming!” Would you not loving say to her, “friend, I understand that your desire to be given to rage is very strong, but you must fight against it.” What about the adulterer? The liar? The thief? Will you excuse their sin also when they say, “I was born this way”, or “the temptation is just to strong”? You will have compassion, I’m sure. But you will not excuse their sin. Why the different standard when it comes to same sex attraction? God calls homosexual acts sinful. Who are we to disagree with God. 

What those who experience same sex attraction need is Christ. Indeed, this is what we all need. We all know what it is to have our affections bent out of shape because of sin. We all know what it is to be tempted to sin. We have all experienced the powerful pull of the world, the flesh and of the evil one himself. No one is immune from this. All have acted upon it. All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. All need the Savior. All need to have their sins washed away. All need to be renewed by the word of God and by his Spirit. Oh, that sinners like you and me would come to have faith in Jesus Christ who is the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. 

Listen to God’s word: “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God.” Listen carefully to Paul’s words as he wrote to the Christians living in Corinth! He went on to say, “And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9–11, ESV). “And such were some of you”, he said. You Christians, prior to being “washed… sanctified… and justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ”, were those things. You were sexually immoral, idolaters, adulterers, men who practice homosexuality, thieves, etc., etc.

The scriptures are clear that it is a sin to practice homosexuality. Certainly, God does not view homosexual marriages as valid, for they are sinful relationships, and a distortion of his original design for marriage. 

The same may be said of polygamous or polyandrous marriages. They are a distortion of God’s original design.   

In the beginning God created one male and one female and joined them together in one flesh union. This is God’s design for marriage. This is the pattern to follow. The two became one in marriage and they were to stick together like glue. 

It is interesting to notice that many of the biblical patriarchs and heroes of the faith (so called), entered into polygamous relationships. Think of Abraham, Jacob, and King David, for example. These men took more than one wife. This would not be so difficult to understand if one would simply recognize, first of all, that not everything in the Bible is prescriptive, but is sometimes only descriptive. When the scriptures reveal that Abraham took Hagar as a wife alongside Sarah in his old age it does not mean that it was right, it simply describes what happened. And notice that the narrative itself suggests that it was wrong for him to do so. It was a foolish move, the result of unbelief, and a decision that resulted in much heartache. Abraham in this instance decided to go the way of the world and to act according to human wisdom instead of believing upon and following after his God. The same can be said for Jacob and David. Secondly, we must acknowledge that although there are some things about the lives of the patriarchs that are to be admired and imitated (namely, their eventual faith in the promises of God), the scriptures actually emphasis their sins and shortcomings in order to demonstrate that whatever good came from them was not the result of their own doing, but by the grace of God. Their polygamous marriages would be an example of this – they were wrong, even for them and in that day.   

Where do we find God’s ideal for the marriage relationship? Not in the life of Abraham, nor in the present trends within our godless society, but in the Holy Scriptures in general, and at creation in particular. The marriage covenant is to be made between one man and one woman.

Two, the marriage covenant is made under God.

There is a horizontal dimension to marriage, no doubt. A man and woman stand before one another and take vows. But there is also a vertical dimension. The man and woman make their vows before God. Listen again to Malachi 2:14 which says, “the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant” (Malachi 2:14, ESV). And listen again to Jesus’ words in Mark 10. commenting on the Genesis 2 passage, Jesus said, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mark 10:9, ESV). When a man and women enter into the marriage covenant God is involved. God is witness to the covenant being made. And God is the one who joins the man and women together in one flesh union so that two become one flesh. This is why Jesus offers these words of warning, “what therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mark 10:9, ESV). Those who participate in the undoing of a marriage covenant are in fact undoing a work that God has done. Notice that I did not say, “all who have been divorced” – for there are valid grounds for divorce given in the pages of Holy Scripture, as we will see – but “those who participate in the undoing of a marriage covenant”. These – and I have in mind here the unfaithful husband or wife, the seductive woman or man who draws the spouse away, or those who facilitate the ungodly act – these are in fact fighting against God and should expect his judgement. Lord have mercy on us. The marriage covenant is one made under God.

Three, the marriage covenant is made before others.

I suppose the only exception to this rule would be the wedding of Adam and Eve, for there were no other humans to witness it. I suppose we could say that God and the angels attended their wedding. But throughout the scriptures we do notice that marriage vows would be made before witnesses. Consider the wedding of Ruth and Boaz (Ruth 4). Consider that wedding events in the Bible are described as feasts involving the community. Consider that Christ preformed his first miracle at a wedding in Galilee when he turned water to wine.  When we take wedding vows we say them before God and man. Why? In part, because the marriage institution is for the good of society. 

The vows that we make in the wedding ceremony are very important, friends. The vows are what communicate the substance of the covenant being entered into. The most important part of the wedding ceremony are the vows. And may I suggest that traditional are the best. I would warn against novelty in the wedding vows. I would also warn against using them as a time for comedy. The wedding vows should be taken seriously. A bride and groom should say something like this to one another in the presence of God and man:

“I take you to be my wedded spouse, and I do promise and covenant before God and these witnesses to be your loving and faithful spouse in sickness and in health, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, as long as we both shall live.”

Four, the marriage covenant authorizes sexual intimacy.

Sex outside of the marriage relationship is a distortion of God’s design. Put more bluntly, it is sinful. The world scoffs at this idea, doesn’t it, but the scriptures are clear. And you would think that even the godless would be able to recognize the slew of troubles that come upon men and women when they engage in sex outside of the bonds of marriage. 

It is important to recognize that sex does not create the one flesh union that Genesis 2:24 and Mark 10 mention. The joining together of a man and women as one flesh does not happen through intercourse. Instead, it is the marriage covenant that joins a man and woman together as one flesh, and the act of sex is a sign and seal of that union. 

The reason that sex outside of the bonds of marriage is sinful is because it is a misuse of God’s gift. Sex is to be enjoyed by a husband and wife. It is symbolizes their union. It aids in their intimacy. It is the means of procreation, which is appropriate for those who have been joined together in marriage. To engage in sex outside of the bounds of marriage is a misuse of the gift of God. 

An illustration that a Christian would would understand would be that of the Lord’s Supper. Who should partake of the Lord’s Supper? The one who has faith in Christ should partake. Partaking of the Supper does not unite us to Christ – faith does. Instead, the Lord’s Supper is a sign of the covenantal and spiritual bond that exists between Christ and his people. It is highly inappropriate for someone who does not have faith in Christ, who has not been united covenantally and spiritually to Christ, to partake of the Supper, therefore. They are receiving the sign without the having the substance of the thing signified. It is a misuse of the gift of God. And so it is with sex outside the marriage covenant. It is to partake of the sign apart from the substance. It is a profaning of that which is holy. 

This is why Paul, when speaking against sex outside the bounds of marriage says, “Or do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh” (1 Corinthians 6:16, ESV). His point is that sexual intimacy is appropriate only for those who have been wed. 

Five, the marriage is a covenant is to last until death. 

In time we will come to talk about divorce and remarriage. The scriptures do say that there are valid grounds for divorce. Specifically, they are adultery and abandonment. In the case of adultery and abandonment divorce is permitted. We will come to deal with these things carefully in the weeks to come. Today I am making the more foundational observation that God’s ideal for the marriage relationship is that it last for life. 

Remember the definition of the marriage covenant that was given earlier. Marriage “a lifelong covenant of companionship between a man and a woman that has been established under God and before the community” (Newheiser, Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage, 6).

That the marriage convent is to last for life is also heard in the traditional vows which conclude with the words, “as long as we both shall live.”

And this was Jesus’ perspective also. When the Pharisees were asking him when divorce was permissible he decided to set forth the ideal for marriage when he said, “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Mark 10:9, ESV). 

This was Jesus’ interpretation of the passage that is before us in Genesis 2:24, which says, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24, ESV).

Jesus’ understanding of Genesis 2:24 was that it set forth God’s ideal for marriage. And God’s ideal is that a husband and wife would break with the household they were raised in, would establish their own household, and having been made one flesh, would stick to one another like glue. The word translated in the ESV as “hold fast” means “cling to, to join with, to stay with.” 

God’s design is that marriage be permeant. And how important it is for this to be said. It is important for those who hope to marry in the future to hear this. They need to understand now, and not after the fact, that when the stand before God and man to take their wedding vows they are not saying, “well, we will see how it goes.” No! They are making a promise – they are taking a vow – to be “loving and faithful” to the one standing opposite them for life. This they will do “in sickness and in health, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow, as long as we both shall live.” This is important for those who hope to marry in the future to hear. And it is also important for those who are married now to hear. It is good to for them to be reminded of these things. 

The trouble is that many do not mean what they say when they take their wedding vows. With their mouths they say I will be “loving and faithful, in sickness and in health, in plenty and in want, in joy and in sorrow”, but in their hearts they mean “I’ll stick around so long as you fulfill me. I’ll be faithful so long as things go well. I’ll remain so long as you make me happy.” Lord help us. In the marriage covenant we are vowing to be loving and faithful to other, even if things don’t go well. 

Application

Do you see that there is a connection between God’s covenantal relationship with his people and the covenant of marriage? Marriage is to function as a picture of God’s covenantal faithfulness to his people. Is your marriage a picture of covenantal faithfulness?

What is it that holds your marriage together?  Will it last so long as you feel satisfied? Or will it last because you have made a promise?

Are you selfless or selfish in your marriage? Do you look at your spouse and think, “I hope he or she pleases me today?” Or do you think, “I hope that I might please him or her”?

To those not married who hope to wed in the future, I hope that you would agree that it is important for you to understand marriage before entering into it. 

May God be glorified in our marriages. May the love of Christ be displayed as we serve one another and extend grace to one another in Jesus’ name.  

Old Testament Reading: Genesis 2:4-17

“These are the generations of the heavens and the earth when they were created, in the day that the Lord God made the earth and the heavens. When no bush of the field was yet in the land and no small plant of the field had yet sprung up—for the Lord God had not caused it to rain on the land, and there was no man to work the ground, and a mist was going up from the land and was watering the whole face of the ground— then the Lord God formed the man of dust from the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living creature. And the Lord God planted a garden in Eden, in the east, and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground the Lord God made to spring up every tree that is pleasant to the sight and good for food. The tree of life was in the midst of the garden, and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. A river flowed out of Eden to water the garden, and there it divided and became four rivers. The name of the first is the Pishon. It is the one that flowed around the whole land of Havilah, where there is gold. And the gold of that land is good; bdellium and onyx stone are there. The name of the second river is the Gihon. It is the one that flowed around the whole land of Cush. And the name of the third river is the Tigris, which flows east of Assyria. And the fourth river is the Euphrates. The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it. And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, ‘You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.’” (Genesis 2:4–17, ESV)

New Testament Reading: Hebrews 4:14–16

“Since then we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:14–16, ESV)

Introduction 

Brothers and sisters, I hope and pray that you are not growing tired of our rather tedious journey through the first few chapters of Genesis. All scripture is important, but there are some passages that are more foundational than others. Genesis chapters 1 through 3 are foundational. They communicate truths that are basic and seminal. These chapters lay down foundations necessary for a worldview that is biblical and true. And so it is good that we take our time here. 

It is so very important for us to have a worldview that is biblical and true. By “worldview” I mean the way in which we view the world. A worldview is a philosophy of life. A persons worldview is the sum total of what he or she thinks of life biggest questions. Where did we come from? What and who are we? What is our purpose and destiny? It is so important that our worldview be biblical and true, for it will undoubtably shape the way that we live our lives. By “true” I mean that we must have a worldview that corresponds to the reality of things. And by “biblical” I mean that our worldview must come ultimately from God’s word. 

I hope that you would agree that God is the only one capable of communicating to us a view of the world that is thoroughly true. Yes, unbelieving scientists, philosophers and theologians may seek to establish their own worldview independent from God through their observation of the natural world and by use of human reason, but they are terribly limited by their own smallness, their creaturely limitations and especially their sin. Do the unbelieving scientists, philosophers and theologians come to some true conclusions? I’m sure they do, for God does reveal himself to some degree through the world he has made. But there are many things that lay beyond our ability to comprehend apart from God’s word. This is due to our creatureliness, not to mention our sin which blinds our eyes and clouds our judgement. 

The true child of God happily acknowledges that we are dependent upon God for truth. He alone is qualified to communicate it. He has graciously revealed his truth to us, and we are to receive it happily and humbly. 

The same questions that God put Job are appropriate for us to consider here. In Job 38:4–7 God questioned Job, saying, “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding. Who determined its measurements—surely you know! Or who stretched the line upon it? On what were its bases sunk, or who laid its cornerstone, when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy?” God’s questioning of Job goes on and on in that passage, and we need not read it all to understand the point of it. “Where were you when [God] laid the foundations of the earth?” We must reply by saying, “Lord, I did not exist. I was not there to witness it.”

Who is qualified to reveal foundational truths to us? Can any man do it on his own? Can any man simply reason his way to the answers to life’s biggest questions? The Christian is content to say, “no, not infallibly.” But God can reveal truth to us infallibly, because he was there in the beginning. More than that, he himself is the source of all things. Just as we are dependent upon God for life and breath, so too we are dependent upon him for truth. If we are to know truth – ultimate truth – then he must reveal it us. 

Thanks be to God that he has revealed it, for “Long ago, at many times and in many ways, God spoke to our fathers by the prophets, but in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed the heir of all things, through whom also he created the world” (Hebrews 1:1–2, ESV). What a treasure the Word of God is! Brothers and sisters, let us treasure God’s word. May it be to us more “desired… than gold, even much fine gold; sweeter also than honey and drippings of the honeycomb” (Psalm 19:10, ESV).

Let us open God’s word often. And whenever it is opened let us listen attentively so that we might understand it, believe it and live accordingly. Friends, let us “put away all filthiness and rampant wickedness and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save [our] souls” (James 1:21, ESV).

What are the foundational truths that have been established for us so far in our study of Genesis 1 and 2. Among other things we have learned that God is the Creator and we are his creatures. I cannot think of a more basic truth than this, and yet so many live as if it were not so. Many live as if they were God, and God was theirs to create. No friends, God is God, and we are his creatures. We have been made by him and in his image. As image bearers of God we were created to commune with God. We were created to imitate him in his kingship. Man, as he came from the hand of God, was to exercise “dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth” (Genesis 1:26, ESV). The man and women together were to “be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it…” (Genesis 1:28, ESV). 

What does this have to do with you and me? It has everything to do with you and me for it reveals something of the purpose for which God created man.

In Genesis 2 we learned that God entered into a covenant with the man. It was a covenant of obedience or works. Evidently the man and women were placed under a time of testing. Two trees were set before them – the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  They were created with a free will. God created “man with that natural liberty and power of acting upon choice.” They were “neither forced, nor by any necessity of nature determined to do good or evil” (LBC 9.1). The man and women were put to the test. The reward for obedience was life – a higher order of life than they had experienced in the garden, eternal life, a glorified life. The stated consequence for disobedience was death – spiritual death, as well as physical. “God created man upright and perfect, and gave him a righteous law, which had been unto life had he kept it, and threatened death upon the breach thereof… (LBC 6.1). The two tree functioned as sacraments, symbolizing obedience and life on the one hand, and rebellion and death on the other. 

What does this have to do with you and me? It has everything to do with you and me, for it shows what it means to born into this world fallen and in sin. Though we have not yet come to this part of the story, you know it well enough. Adam did not keep the covenant, but broke it. And we are born in Adam. We are born under the covenant of works, which is broken. It cannot give life. It only brings death. 

What does this have to do with you and me? It has everything to do with you and me, for it also shows what Christ has accomplished. He, being the second Adam, has kept the covenant of works. He has paid the penalty for sin, which is death. And this he has done for all of God’s elect – for all who have and do and will believe upon his name.  

God planted a garden in a place called Eden and there he placed the man and woman whom he had formed. The garden was the place where this covenant was made. It was not just a garden, but it was a temple or sanctuary. There in that place man enjoyed communion with God, for God was present in that place. It was in the garden that man was to fulfill his purpose as he lived in perpetual obedience to the God who made him. it was in the garden that Adam was to keep the covenant. Adam and Eve were to worship and serve God there in that place. They were to reproduce and teach their children and their children’s children to worship and serve God there in that place. They were to fill earth with the image of God by bearing children and by working to expand the garden of God. This they were to do until the whole earth was filled with God’s glory.    

What does this have to do with you and me? It has everything to do with you and me, for it shows God’s original purpose for humanity. Also, it makes it possible for us to understand what Christ has earned. Not only has he earned the salvation of individuals, but also the new heavens and earth in which righteousness dwells. The first Adam was to accomplish this – he was to fill the earth with righteousness until heaven and earth became one – but he failed. Thanks be to God, the second Adam, who is Christ our Lord, has succeeded through his obedient life and his sacrificial death. He, by virtue of his life, death, burial and resurrection, has been “appointed the heir of all things” (Hebrews 1:2, ESV). He is the one who has earned the “new heavens and a new earth in which righteousness dwells” (2 Peter 3:13, ESV), for which we eagerly await. 

Understanding Adam’s original place in the garden also shows what has been restored to us if we are in Christ Jesus. If we are in Christ Jesus, being united to him by faith, then the image of God has been renewed in us. If we are in Christ we are again called sons of God, as Adam was. We again stand before God aright, our enmity with God having been wiped away by the blood of the Lamb. And so too our purpose has been renewed. We who are in Christ have this task, work towards the expansion of God’s kingdom to the ends of the earth. This was Adam’s task, and it is also ours if we are in Christ, the second Adam. The difference, of course, is that we must work towards the expansion of the kingdom of God in a world that is fallen, whereas Adam was originally woking in paradise. He was to work towards the expansion of the garden while also keeping it. When we expand the kingdom of God we do so m=by pushing back the gates of hell.  And we are to work towards the expansion of the kingdom of God, not by pushing out out the borders of the garden sanctuary of God and through reproduction, but through the proclamation of gospel, which is the good news that God has provided a Savior for sinners, Christ Jesus our Lord. And so our work looks different, doesn’t it? But our task is not altogether different from Adam’s original one now that we are in Christ. He was to works towards the expansion of God’s kingdom and so are we.   

All of this matters greatly, friends. When we handle the first few chapters of Genesis we handling things that are absolutely essential to a right understanding of our faith. I hope that you would agree. 

The foundational truth that I wish to emphasize today is a simple one. It is that Adam was not a farmer (as many suppose), but a priest in the garden temple of God. Put differently, Adam’s work was not only to dig irrigation canals and to plant and cultivate trees – his work was not only to bring order to the unordered parts of the earth – but he was also to function as a priest. He was to work and to keep the garden temple of God. His task was to drive away any intruder who would seek to undermine the proper worship of God in that place. Adam was to draw near to God, he was to live holy before him, he was to promote the worship of God, he was to keep the garden, driving away any who would attempt to defile its sanctity. He was to do the work of a priest.   

How do we know that Adam was a priest? By the way, remember that he was also a prophet and king. He was a prophet in that he was to proclaim God’s word to Eve and to his descendants, saying, “thus saith the Lord!” And he was a king in that he was to exercise dominion in imitation of his Maker with Eve his helper at his side. That Adam was a prophet and king seems obvious. But how do we know that Adam was a priest? I have four answers to that question, and then suggestions for application.

One, we know that Adam was a priest by paying careful attention to the narrative of Genesis chapters 2 & 3. 

Notice where Adam was placed after being created by God. He was placed within the garden which, as it was established in the previous sermon, was a temple or sanctuary of God. This is where priests work – in the temple.  

Notice also Adam’s proximity to God. Adam stood in the presence of God. God walked in the garden amongst the man and woman. His presence was in that place. 

Lastly, notice Adam’s work. God commanded him to “work” and to “keep” the garden. Genesis 2:15 says, “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it” (Genesis 2:15, ESV). This is precisely the work that the priests under the Old Covenant were to accomplish. The Levites were to “work and keep” the tabernacle, and later the temple of Israel.  

In Numbers 18 the work of the priests of Israel is described. And notice that their “So the Lord said to Aaron, ‘You and your sons and your father’s house with you shall bear iniquity connected with the sanctuary, and you and your sons with you shall bear iniquity connected with your priesthood. And with you bring your brothers also, the tribe of Levi, the tribe of your father, that they may join you and minister to you while you and your sons with you are before the tent of the testimony. They shall keep [šāmar – same as in Gen 2] guard over you and over the whole tent, but shall not come near to the vessels of the sanctuary or to the altar lest they, and you, die. They shall join you and keep [šāmar – same as in Gen 2] guard over the tent of meeting for all the service [ʿ^aḇôḏāh – noun form of verb, to work in Gen 2] of the tent, and no outsider shall come near you. And you shall keep [šāmar – same as in Gen 2] guard over the sanctuary and over the altar, that there may never again be wrath on the people of Israel. And behold, I have taken your brothers the Levites from among the people of Israel. They are a gift to you, given to the Lord, to do the service [ʿ^aḇôḏāh – noun form of verb, to work] of the tent of meeting. And you and your sons with you shall guard [šāmar – same as keep in Gen 2] your priesthood for all that concerns the altar and that is within the veil; and you shall serve [ʿāḇaḏ – verb, to work, same as in Gen 2]. I give your priesthood as a gift, and any outsider who comes near shall be put to death” (Numbers 18:1–7, ESV). 

The priests of Israel were to “work” and “keep” the tabernacle, and later the temple, just as Adam was to “work” and “keep” the garden. The terminology of “work” and “keep” is shared in common and deliberately so. Why? To show that the garden was a temple and Adam was a priest. The temple of Israel was a microcosm of creation and of Eden, and the priests of Israel were a reflection of Adam in is his original priestly function. 

Adam was to “work” in the garden to the glory of God, laboring towards its universal expansion. And he was to “keep” or to guard the garden from all intruders, preserving its sanctity.  

How do we know that Adam was a priest? First, by paying careful attention to the narrative of Genesis chapters 2 & 3.

Secondly, by observing the development of the theme of “priesthood” in the history of redemption. 

Adam was a priest. In fact the original design for humanity was that all would function as priests. By this I mean that Adam and all his descendants  were to minister in the presence of God. All were to live holy before him, promoting his worship while they preserved the sanctity and extended the bounds of his holy tabernacle.

But notice that after the fall God, by his mercy and grace, still appointed priests. I am thinking of Melchizedek and Arron, the Levites as well as others. What was the meaning of this? Can you see that the presence of priests after the fall communicated that a way to communion with God was still open, despite mans fall into sin. What an extraordinary thing this is! It fits hand in glove with what was said in the previous sermon concerning the temple. Eden was a temple, and the presence of temples after the fall communicated that a way to communion with God was still open, despite mans fall into sin. No longer could we work our way to God, but we could come to him through the offering up of a substitutionary sacrifice – animals at first, and then Christ, the Lamb of God who takes away the sins of he world. The fact that priests remained the world from Adam to Christ communicated that a way to communion with God was still open.  

But notice this, Aaron and the Levites – that is, the priests who ministered to God under the Old Mosaic Covenant in Israel’s tabernacle and temple – were not the first priests. They are the best known priests. Their work is most clearly described for us in the pages of holy scripture. But they were not the first, nor were they the last.  

Adam was a priest. All others are an echo of him. 

Adams children knew to make sacrifices to God. Cain did so badly, but Able got it right. Think about that for a moment. Where did they learn to bring sacrifices to the Lord? The text doesn’t explicitly say, but Adam must have taught them. Making sacrifices to God is priestly work, is it not? Able functioned as a kind of priest, then, as he offered up sacrifices to God as an act of worship before him. This he probably learned from Adam, his priestly father.

And then we have that mysterious figure, Melchizedek. He lived long before Moses, Aaron and Levi, and yet he was a priest of the Lord Most High, and the king of Salem. The book of Hebrews makes it clear that Christ was a priest in the line of Melchizedek, and not Aaron, as the priests of the Old Covent were.

Aaron and the Levites were not the first priests, nor were they the last. Christ himself is the High Priest. And we are priests in him, as we will shall see. 

To solidify the connection between the priests who minister after the fall and Adam as priest, simply consider the imagery of the tabernacle of Israel and the priests who ministered there. The high priest of Israel was to enter the most holy place once per year. He represented the people as he entered the most holy place into the presence of God through the shedding of blood. Picture it now. The priest would walk up to that large curtain embroidered with seraphim. He would enter the most holy place and there he would see the ark of the covenant with the two cherubim on either side guarding that place. Was this not an image of the priest walking back into Eden as it were? After the Adam and Eve were expelled from the garden and cherubim were appointed to guard the entrance. But under the Old Covenant the high priest was invited to enter. A sacrifice had to be made, prefiguring Christ. But a way to the throne of God was still open, thanks be to God. 

Not only did the Old Covenant priests of Israel point forward to Christ, they we also and echo of Adam.

Thirdly, we know that Adam was a priest by comparing Adam, who was a type, with Christ, our great high priest, who is the antitype. 

Paul says directly in Romans 5:14 that Adam “was a type of the one who was to come” (Romans 5:14, ESV), namely Jesus the Christ. 

What is a type? A type is a picture or model or foreshadow of something that yet to come. The Old Testament scriptures are filled with “types” that pointed forward to the coming Savior, who would then be the antitype, or the thing to which the type corresponds. 

C.J. Williams has some wonderful things to say concerning the typology. He says in his book, “The Shadow of Christ in The Book of Job”, that “the person and work of Jesus Christ was imprinted on the history that led to his incarnation, through people and events that were invested with prophetic meaning by God, offering glimpses of the coming Savior, and reassuring God’s people of the promise of his coming.” Another way to say this is that God communicated to his Old Covenant people that the Christ would come not only by speaking through the prophets, but also by types and shadows – historical people and events which “said” something about the coming Christ, but not through words. 

The historical person named Adam was a “type” of Christ. Certain things about him communicated things that would be true concerning the Christ once he arrived. Adam was human – the Christ would be human. Adam was a son of God – Christ would be the Son of God. Adam was born under the Covenant of Works – the Christ would be born under the Covenant of Works. Adam was head or representative of others – Christ would be a head or representative for others. Through Adam’s headship death came to all whom he represented – through Christ’s headship life would come to all he represented. At first it seems inappropriate to compare Adam with Christ. In some respects they couldn’t be more different given the terrible failure of the first and the wonderful success of the second. But the scriptures say that Adam was a “type” which pointed forward to Christ, the antitype. 

Here is the point. If Christ is our high priest, then wouldn’t that mean that Adam was also a priest. This they share in common. The difference between the two is that the one was faithful in his priesthood, whereas the other was found to be unfaithful. This is why there is only :one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus” (1 Timothy 2:5, ESV).

Lastly, and very briefly, we know that Adam was a priest by considering that in Christ we have been renewed to function as priests before our God.

The work of Christ is a work of renewal. Christ restores in us what was lost or marred at the fall. 

Adam was created a son of God. We, in our fallenness are by nature children of wrath (Ephesians 2:3) – children of the devil (John 8:44). In Christ we are restored, adopted as children of God by the Spirit by whom we cry out “Abba Father”. 

Adam was made in the image of God. We, in our fallenness, find that the image is greatly marred and distorted. In Christ the image of God is renewed. “Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator” (Colossians 3:9–10, ESV).

Likewise, Adam was created to live as a priest before God. This was God’s design for all mankind. In our fallenness we do live as faithful priests. But in Christs our priesthood is restored. 

Listen to the way that Peter speaks to the Christian. “As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house…” Ah, you are a God’s temple – do you see it? But there is more! “As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, you yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 2:4–5, ESV).

Did you hear it? If you are in Christ – if you are approaching God through faith in him – then you are God’s temple and you are a priest. What was lost with Adam has been restored in Christ. 

No longer is the priesthood restricted to only a few. Now that Christ, the second Adam, and our faithfully high priest has died and risen, the priestly role has been restored to all who are in him. You are sons of God, each one. You are being renewed in knowledge after the image of your creator. You are a priest before God, as was Adam was a priest, prior to his transgression. Those in Christ, “like living stones… being built up as a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.”

Application

Brothers and sisters, do you see that God’s original design for humanity was that all would function as priests before God?

I wonder if you would consider how far we have fallen. How many from amongst the children of man are interested in coming before God to worship and serve him faithfully according to his revealed will? How many are interested in living holy before him to and to promote his worship amongst others? The answer is that none are interested, unless God intervenes. In our natural and fallen state we happily serve as false priests to false gods. We serve ourselves. We worship the things of this world, and we encourage others to do likewise. Oh, how distorted we are in our sin!

But God is merciful. He has provided a Savior, Christ Jesus our Lord. He is our faithful high priest. He served God faithfully all his life. And in the end he offered himself of for our sins. Are you trusting in him? He is indeed the only mediator between God and man. He is the only priest who can led us to God. Any others who claim to be priests or mediator are liars and should not be trusted. Faith alone in Christ alone can effetely bring us into a right relationship with God. 

If you are in Christ then you have been renewed in the image of God, and you are to walk as a priest before him. Are you?

Are you drawing near to God so as to enjoy his presence?

Are you living holy before him, or are you content with your sin?

Are you faithful in prayer? Prayers for yourself and on behalf of others? 

Are you eager to worship God and to promote the worship of God amongst others?

Are you concerned to bring others to God through faith in Christ, or have you grown complacent?

If you are a husband, father or head of house, are you functioning as a priest in your home? Are you faithfully leading your wife and kids to God through Christ? Are you promoting the worship of God there? Are you interceding for those who God has entrusted to your care? Are you preaching the gospel to your family so that the kingdom of God might be expanded realm over which God had given you dominion?

This is the kind of work that a priest is to do, and you are a kingdom of priests. “You yourselves like living stones are being built up as a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ” (1 Peter 2:4–5, ESV).